Meegs10.13.06's TTC Story

Posted Wednesday, May 20, 2009 5:38 PM

"We know it will all be worthwhile when we finally get to hold a baby in our arms..."

How we met

Travis and I met my freshman (his junior) year at Lehigh University. A friend of mine dragged me to a party at his fraternity house, and one of the first people we met there was Travis. We spent the whole night talking and at the end of the night as I went to leave, he gave me a quick kiss and asked me to come back tomorrow. I did (Oct. 13, 2000), and we've been together ever since.

Engaged!

December 23rd, 2004... we had plans to head to my parents place for Christmas. Travis arrived home from work and I had already packed up the car to go but he asked if we could hang out for a bit before we left. I agreed, and we relaxed together, but Travis soon headed into the bedroom. I decided to make some dinner and preceded to cut myself on a can. As I go into the bedroom to get to the bathroom (to get a band-aid) I hear Christmas music playing on the radio, and see Travis looking at me expectantly. I blurt out that I cut my thumb, and he helped me clean it up. As I headed back to the kitchen, he mentioned that he was hoping to lure me to the bedroom with the music. I turned to him and he kissed me, then dropped to one knee. At that point he said all sorts of sweet things, and asked me to be his wife. After I said "Yes" he pulled out the champagne that he had opened for the occasion. Afterward, he explained that he wanted the proposal to be something simple and beautiful to fit us, which I think he did perfectly.

Our first home

We bought our first home in April of 2005, a three-bedroom twin in the suburbs of Philadelphia. It definitely needed some work, (every room except for the kitchen was a shade of pink!) but it was a great deal and in good shape. We immediately fixed up the master bedroom before moving in. I told Travis I needed a relaxing room to fall asleep in, not something that looked like cotton candy.

Getting married

Travis and I were married on October 13, 2006, our sixth anniversary, at an outdoor wedding ceremony in West Chester, PA. It was a perfect autumn day, everything we could have hoped for! We had a weather scare the night before when it was looking pretty dreary at the rehearsal and the wind was blowing hard, but the next morning we had a beautiful day! Bright sunny skies, and crisp, but not too cold, air. It was such an amazing day, surrounded by all of our family and friends.

Pre-TTC

I definitely had the baby yearn from our wedding on, but we both wanted to wait around 2 years before starting to try for kids. We wanted to do some work on our house, pay down some debts, and do some traveling. For our first anniversary, we took a trip to Ireland; and a few months later we traveled with some friends to Cabo San Lucas. We also fixed up our bathroom some, completely redid our guest bedroom, and paid off all debts except for our mortgage and my student loans.

Our first pregnancy

Early 2008 I was very ready for a baby and approached Travis about when he would like to start. At first he was not ready at all, but after a few months we made the decision to start trying in the fall. In August I got my IUD removed, and in September we started trying. We took the "see what happens approach" and didn't chart, only keeping track of my cycles and watching for other signs of ovulation. We were very excited and blessed to get our BFP on January 4th, and another darker one on January 5th (approx. 14 & 15 dpo, our third month of trying)... for a due date of September 13, 2009. I had my first appointment at 8 weeks on the 3rd of February.

On March 5 we were scheduled for our 12 week ultrasound, which would be our first look at the baby. Unfortunately, it was during that ultrasound that we discovered that we had lost our little one. The baby was measuring about a month behind and had no heartbeat. We were devastated. We saw the doctor the next day and scheduled a D&E for the following Wednesday (March 11). The procedure itself was easy, as I elected to be put under. The emotional aspect was much harder to deal with as we tried to adjust to the fact that we were no longer pregnant. I was so lucky to have Travis during that time. He grieved with me and yet was so strong for me at the same time.

Trying again

I went for my follow-up appointment 2 weeks later and was told that everything looked as it should, and we were clear to start trying again once I got one regular period. So that's where we are now, again TTC and hoping for a successful pregnancy next time. It's very surreal to be dealing with 2 ww and phantom symptoms when just a few months ago I was dealing with morning sickness, but we are just trying to enjoy the process. We know it will all be worthwhile when we finally get to hold a baby in our arms.

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sarai0316's TTC Story

Posted Wednesday, May 13, 2009 6:09 PM

"We have been blessed with several godchildren whom I love dearly, but there is nothing like having your own child..."

How we met

DH and I met back in high school. We were both dancers and involved in musical theatre. I had actually met him in the 10th grade during a rehearsal and thought to myself, “He would never talk to me.” Two years later we met at a party and that’s when the love affair began. We went through a lot of ups and downs, just as young love brings, but always knew that we would end up together. We just couldn’t get enough of each other. He went off to Pepperdine University and I headed to Arizona State University and we kind of stopped talking during that first year of college, but during the summer of 2005 we decided to start our relationship over as friends and started going to church together. After getting our lives right with God, we were able to truly understand and learn how to love one another and knew we were going to be together forever and had thoughts of getting married.

Getting hitched

Once in church, we got back together with God heading our life and decided to get married. He proposed to me on Labor Day in 2005 (down on one knee) and of course I said yes! We ended up getting married October 1, 2006. I was 20 and DH was 19. We got our first apartment together about a month before the wedding, but did not actually move in and live together until our wedding night. DH is now a 6th grade Math/Science teacher and I am working as a Purchase Order Coordinator for Karl Storz Endoscopy, America.

Patiently waiting for baby

We have always wanted children. We actually took in a cousin's daughter for a couple months and then her mother took her back. This situation really took a toll on me and the experience made me want a child even more. We have never used any form of birth control but have never gotten PG. Back in 2006 I started to have really bad AF (Dysmanuria). I was in the ER almost every month. In February 2007 I had a Laparoscopy in which my OB/GYN discovered that I had polyps and he removed them. For a couple of months I was fine until the pain came back along with the polyps and fibroid tumors.  I had to have another surgery in November of 2007 to have them removed again.  During this time I was also developing symptoms of Systemic Lupus Erythematosus as well. By March of 2008 my health was heading downhill and still no child. I was beginning to get discouraged. Then my doctor’s informed me that I should not TTC until my health was stable. This was hard because I did not know how long this would take. It seemed like every time I went to the doctor something else was wrong.  In April 2008, after being hospitalized, I was officially diagnosed with SLE and was continuing to suffer from Dysmanuria. By November 2008 I had another LAP to remove polyps again. This year, my health has been much better and things are starting to look up. DH and I have being actively TTC and waiting on a BFP to show up one day even though my OB/GYN thinks the polyps are growing back.

Keeping the faith

I can’t wait to be a mother. We have been blessed with several godchildren whom I love dearly, but there is nothing like having your own child. I know that our dreams of having children will come true one day. What keeps us on this TTC journey is our faith in God and the strong love and understanding we have for each other, knowing that we will be blessed one day. Children are a gift and we are waiting on our special gift to arrive any day...

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hgriffith's TTC Story

Posted Tuesday, May 05, 2009 5:28 PM

"All I can do at this point is pray and enjoy spending time talking with other women in the same situation..."

How we met 

My husband Daniel and I actually grew up in the same area and even went to the same church, but didn’t meet until after college. I think it goes back to the saying “timing is everything,” because we could have met in a number of ways over the years, considering we both attended the same university and our moms even worked together. I can even remember my mom saying, “Terrie’s son is going to OSU”, and my reply was "…So?" At the time, I was thinking, "There's 20,000 students there and I’m just going to happen to run into him? Not likely."

The first time I saw Daniel I remember thinking he was cute and asking another girl who he was. When she told me, I was surprised. We didn’t start dating right away, but after we did I knew he was different. We dated for just under a year before we became engaged.

Popping the question

Daniel surprised me by crashing my girls' shopping trip with my mom and sisters. I drove up to Dallas by myself on Thursday night and they were to meet me the next day. But what I didn’t know was that Daniel actually came with them. I didn’t even see him until Saturday, when he just showed up at the mall we went to. Of course he had to leave me in suspense and just told me he came just because he was bored. But after shopping, catching a movie, and grabbing dinner, he finally got to it: the real reason he came. When he proposed, I was blown away. While I knew he was the one for me, we hadn’t talked at all about getting married. (Except that just the weekend before, he said his aunt had asked if we were getting married and he told her no.)

Just after we got engaged, Daniel got an interview for a job, in another city, about two hours away.  After a month of waiting, they finally called back and said they wanted him to start in two weeks. So we scrambled to find him an apartment and I stayed back at my job until we were married in February 2006. It was definitely a little stressful, being apart during our entire engagement, but some how we managed it.

Baby talk

I always knew I wanted to have children; I baby-sat for lots of families and worked in the church nursery for years. Daniel, on the other hand, really wanted to have some time to just be married and wasn’t in any hurry to start a family.   So we used the time to get our finances in order and prepare. I remember a year ago in January, Daniel said to me, "Let's get these two things paid off and then we can start having kids." Well that’s all I needed to hear and I was off and determined to get them paid off as fast as possible! What Daniel didn’t anticipate was how driven I am. I had one item checked off by July and the other close behind. I stopped taking my birth control in July with thoughts of TTC in October. 

As it turned out, Daniel wasn’t ready yet, unfortunately. I was really upset and reminded him about what he said. He denied it and I waited a few more months until finally in December, he said okay. So we have been trying now since December of 2008 to have our first child. It has been very emotional for me, I had no idea I wouldn’t be pregnant after five months of trying. I guess it’s hard because I feel I’ve been ready for almost two years now. All I can do at this point is pray and enjoy spending time talking with other women in the same situation. Whenever we do have our first baby, I hope to stay home for a while.  

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uvalori85's TTC Story

Posted Thursday, April 16, 2009 5:38 PM

"We are both realistic and know that TTC can be a long and stressful journey, but are thankful that our relationship and love has brought us this far together..."

A fateful meeting

Sean and I met online via Myspace. One night I was online commenting friends when I got a message from a stranger. I typically deleted messages from people I didn't know, but something told me to open it up and read it. It was a simple little message saying hi. I clicked his page and found that we had a lot in common and he was very attractive so I messaged him back. We talked for a few hours online and then exchanged phone numbers and decided to meet up.

After getting to know each other better with each passing day, we discovered that we both grew up two streets away from each other when we were children. We most likely even rode the same school bus. Who knew that we would eventually meet and fall in love!

On our first date, he got lost on the way to my house. It was really cute. Once he finally got there, we drove to the beach at the lake for a moonlight swim. We had our very first kiss under the picnic shelter. It was very romantic. And we've been inseparable ever since.

Tying the knot

Sean proposed on my mother's front porch on July 7, 2007. When he asked, I didn't believe him. I made him swear that he was serious. The thing that made me believe him was when he said that we could tell our friends and family about the engagement. I had never been more excited in my life. I knew he was excited too when he was the one who called and told my parents.We got married on the beach at the lake where I grew up on June 7, 2008. I guess we have a way with dates!

It was very sentimental to us to get married in a similar setting as our first date. We had a small wedding with an Irish theme. We had the claddagh as the main symbol in our wedding and used traditional Irish vows and a blessing. So much went wrong that day -- from it being the hottest day of the year at 108 degrees, to forgetting to bring the toasting flutes, to forgetting to bring the marriage license, to me falling and scraping my leg... but I have to say it was the most perfect day of my life.

Our TTC journey

We decided to start TTC in January. I had my annual appointment in January and by that time I was already a week late for my period. The blood work from the doctor came back negative and I was upset. But even more upsetting was the news about my pap results. We found out that I had low-grade abnormal cells. I was then scheduled for a colposcopy which showed high grade abnormal. We were crushed. Everything we had read said it wasn't a good idea to get pregnant until after procedures had been done to remove the cells. We didn't want to wait any longer than necessary to starting trying for a baby. Finally in March, after another pap test, we found out that the cells had completely regressed. And now here we are. We're very excited and rip roarin' and ready to go to start building our family.

Being thankful

We are both realistic and know that TTC can be a long and stressful journey. But we are both thankful that our relationship and love has brought us this far together. We can face anything together. And I'm personally thankful for all the wonderful and inspiring women whom I've met on The Bump boards. I have learned so much from them about how to read my body's signals. They are all so encouraging.

> Read more about uvalori85!

> Want to share your TTC story? Email it to kstanford@theknot.com.

Jennifer*L*923's TTC Story

Posted Wednesday, April 08, 2009 3:59 PM

"This summer, it will have been two years and probably almost 30 cycles since we started this adventure. I did not see that one coming..."

How we met

Justin and I met in early December of 2001. We were unknowingly set up by his roommate’s girlfriend, whom I was in a business class work group with. We both were unimpressed upon the first meeting, so I definitely can’t claim it was love at first sight! We actually ended up giving each other another chance and going out on a date a week or two later, it was after that date that we became virtually inseparable. We moved in together after I graduated in 2003. That was rough and a little rocky, as combining two forces isn’t always easy, but we ended up adopting a little pit bull lab mix named Fudge who became the center of our lives and our little angel.

Six months after Fudge came along, we adopted another little ball of joy—another pit bull mix named Memphis. Justin bought our first house in the summer of 2004 and with that came, you guessed it, another little one, our pit bull mix Peyton. Our dogs are the light of our world; they are our babies. We are well aware of the stereotypes pit bulls have in our society and it has become a passion of ours to educate people and prove them wrong. I think we’ve done well so far!

Getting married

We were engaged in August of 2005, Justin actually proposed with the key to the safe deposit box that the ring was in. We were planning a trip to Las Vegas and Justin had all kinds of elaborate plans to do it there on our trip; but then the ring came in a bit earlier than expected and he just couldn’t wait. We went out to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants and the entire evening, he seemed anxious and distracted. We went home and as I was looking for something in the bedroom, he got down on his knee and proposed. I thought he was kidding, but he wasn’t! We were married the following September at the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center in Austin. Unfortunately our ceremony was rained out and we had to move it indoors, but that means good luck, right? It turned out to be a wonderful evening, despite the weather, and I couldn’t have imagined it turning out to be a better celebration with our families and our friends than it did.  Everyone, including us, had a fantastic time.  

Trying for a baby

I went off birth control in May 2007. I don’t know that either of us were completely ready, but we knew that if we waited until we were both “ready”, we’d always find other excuses as to why we weren’t. There would always be more money to make, more vacations we want to take, more time we’d want to spend alone. We had a home with plenty of room to grow, our dogs are well-behaved adult dogs, our parents are all more than ready for grandkids, and we both have solid careers. All signs pointed to “go”.  

When we made the decision to TTC, the images that played through our heads were those of jumping for joy in the kitchen after seeing those two pink lines, the tears of joy our parents would inevitably cry when we announced the news, the painting of the nursery and the subsequent pink or blue paint we’d certainly get all over each other; we thought about the tears of joy we’d cry at the first sight of our new son or daughter and the sleepless nights we’d endure for the first few weeks. I never dreamed of what became the reality we’d face; the tears of sadness and hurt at another failed cycle, the painful periods I’d experience, the sleepless nights wondering what was wrong and then the “Why me?” and “Why us?” questions; just as I never imagined the guilt that would swallow me because I’m the one with the problem, or that the jumping for joy would simply be because our insurance would cover yet another surgery to attempt to fix the problem.

Doing everything it takes

In March of 2008, I was diagnosed with moderate endometriosis and a blocked fallopian tube due to the endometriosis. I’ll be having a laparoscopic surgery this summer to fix or remove the tube and hopefully this will do the trick. By then, it will have been two years and probably almost 30 cycles since we started this adventure. I did not see that one coming.

This process, despite the results so far, has brought Justin and me closer together. He’s my rock, my best friend, and someone that I don’t want to have to be without. It’s strengthened our relationship in ways that I can’t describe. It has challenged us and it has challenged our faith, but we’re better together and as individuals because we’ve gone through something that’s broken us down, something that’s pushed us. I know that when we finally have the baby we are meant to have, it is going to be that much sweeter and happier because we know what we went through to get there. We’re going to have a different perspective than we would have had if we had gotten pregnant right away.

I’m looking forward to being a mother for a few different reasons. I love to watch my dogs play, learn, and figure out new things. That “Ah ha!” moment is priceless. I know that I’ll love to watch our children learn and discover new things, and I can’t wait to teach them about the world. I think I’m going to also love watching Justin be a father. It’s something that he has always wanted and he’s such a great “dad” to our pups, so I know he’s going to be a natural. After wanting this for so long, I’m actually also looking forward to some of the not-so-great moments, like middle of the night feedings, or cleaning up messes.  It will just mean that I’m finally someone’s mother and it will have been worth it.

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skinnursemandee's TTC Story

Posted Wednesday, April 01, 2009 5:46 PM

"The day we have our child together in our arms is the day that the whole world will stop in our eyes and nothing else will ever matter..."

Fated meeting

My husband and I met back when we were freshmen in high school, almost 20 years ago. Tim used to put letters in my locker asking me for a date with the then-traditional "Check the box yes or no" option. Well sadly, I always said no. I was his older brother's friend (his girlfriend's best friend) and thought it would be awkward to date Tim; if things didn't work out, then I would be in an odd position with his brother. Well fast-forward a few years, I got an email from Tim's brother saying that Tim was about to deploy to Kuwait and wanted everyone he knew to write him. I decided to write to Tim while he was deployed with the United States Army. Our letters resembled something out of a World War II romance novel. We began to share everything about our lives with each other through our letters and we developed this "love" and respect for each other because we could be completely open and honest through our writing. It was magical!
  
After about 9 months of letter writing (mind you we had not seen each other since high school graduation), Tim came home from the Middle East. He called me, on a sunny day in July and I still remember his words as if he spoke them just a moment ago. He was home and wanted to see me. I was so nervous but so excited. The moment we saw each other we knew it was meant to be. All those months writing and worrying about his safety had all come to the precious moment that we realized how much we had fallen in love. It was an old fashioned kind of romance. We could found it so hard to be away from each other when it was time for him to go back to his new home in Georgia (1000 miles away).
  
During one of my trips to visit him, we realized that we were soul mates and wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. A short 10 months from when he came home to visit for the first time, I was leaving my career, my family and friends. I loaded up what I could fit into my jeep and I moved to Georgia to be with him and we were married only three short weeks after I moved there. That was almost a decade ago.
  
The baby journey
  
We knew we wanted to have a child together immediately and wasted no time in trying to conceive.  At first it was so much fun and exciting to know that we could be creating a life together. We got pregnant very quickly and were so excited to start our family but sadly it was not our time, as my pregnancy ended in miscarriage. This sadly seemed to be the trend for a few years. After a few years, I was diagnosed with breast cancer for which I had to undergo chemotherapy and radiation, and I chose to have a bilateral mastectomy. I was so young that I didn't want to have to worry about this for the rest of my life and chose to take the most drastic of treatments to increase my survival rate. I knew however that this could lessen my chances of ever having a biological child with my husband but I knew that I owed it to my family and importantly myself to fight as hard as I could to survive, even if that meant we could not have a family together.
  
After I was in remission from my cancer and all of my treatment was done, we got the green light from my doctors to start trying to have a baby again. Through many attempts of IVF and IUI and one FET, it just never happened for us. We decided that it was time to look into adoption. I was determined to have my family. I figured that cancer may have taken away my chances of ever becoming pregnant, but cancer will never rob me of my chance to become a mother. However, we hit a road block when we soon learned that many adoption agencies required that I be in full remission for a approximately five years prior to approving any adoption to take place.
  
Where we are today
  
Right now, we have decided to give TTC another chance. We met with a new team of OB/GYN's and RE's who through thorough testing have determined that I may be able to have a child with my husband. So right now we are on a whole new cocktail of medications and supplements that should allow me to ovulate as well as increase my chances of implantation. It has only been less than two months on this new "cocktail" but I have already seen so many changes that makes me feel so optimistic about being able to become pregnant. Our dreams of becoming parents and sharing our love and our home with a child is within our grasp! We are so excited about midnight feedings and diaper changes... even the late nights up with our baby crying are all going to be music to our ears. All we have been through with my health and my husbands frequent deployments, has truly made us stronger as a couple and as people. We truly value family and everything that embodies it. The day we have our child together in our arms is the day that the whole world stops in our eyes and nothing else will ever matter!
  
Finding support online
  
I would have given up a long time ago, especially since our adoption was denied, if it had not been for the women on The Bump. There is a special group of women out there who know who they are (GP) who have opened their arms to me. They all are struggling the same way I am. All of our journeys may be different but yet we are all striving for the same thing...Life!  The love and companionship that they offer can not be duplicated anywhere. They are the most amazing selfless group of women that I am so glad to have found. They have renewed my faith. I will always thank them and hold them dear to my heart for helping me in this journey.
 

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Katers1279: Our TTC Story

Posted Thursday, March 26, 2009 5:27 PM

"We both agree that all of our obstacles happened for a reason and that we are going to be even better parents now that we've seen life isn't as easy as we'd all like it to be..."

How we met

Brett and I first met at work in June of 2003. We became friends quite quickly and started hanging out in group social settings. For the first few months, we had no idea we'd ever be anything more than buddies. However, the group outings started turning into "Katy and Brett go off in a corner to talk and are oblivious to everyone and everything else around them." A short three months later, we went on our first date. Sitting across the table from Brett at dinner, I knew there was something different about this date. I had no idea this it would be the beginning of a lifetime together, but, I knew something was different.

A "short" four years later, Brett proposed in Maui, Hawaii. Never one to make a scene, he pulled off the biggest surprise ever when he proposed on stage at a Hawaiian Luau. Less than a year later, we were married in Jamaica at a beautiful sunset ceremony on the beach. We brought along 30 of our nearest and dearest friends and family and had the week of our lives. 

We planned on trying to conceive immediately after the wedding. I've been dreaming of becoming a mom for as long as I can remember. I've been looking forward to the magical feeling of a baby sleeping on my chest, the sound of our baby laughing, the Christmas mornings with our children... The minute we were married, I was ready to move from "wife" to "mommy." 

A bump in the road

Unfortunately, that hasn't been the case. The day after our wedding, Brett became horribly sick. We flew home from Jamaica and went directly to the hospital. After three hospital visits, a week long hospital stay and examinations by five different specialties in medicine, Brett was diagnosed with Reactionary Rheumatoid Arthritis. 

For two months, he was barely able to move. He couldn't walk alone, couldn't shower by himself, couldn't even make himself a sandwich. It was never a question that I'd do everything I could to care for my husband. To see him so weak, so frail and so ill made me love him even more than I ever thought possible. You go through your early life thinking your husband will be the one to take care of you...and when it's turned around, it's a life changing experience. I'd go to work each morning after making sure he was safely out of bed, fed and moved to the living room for the day.  I'd come home for lunch to make sure he was okay. I'd come home at night, we'd watch TV and we'd head to bed. It took him two months, several very strong pain and steroid medications, and a trip to our local research hospital for him to finally recover. Those two moths were probably the worst of our entire lives. 

Brett was finally symptom-free on December 22, 2008. We were over the moon and ready to try to conceive again. And then, on December 26th, the office we both worked in closed its doors. The economy had gotten the best of our small mortgage company and we were both unemployed. I was devastated. Trying to conceive has been my dream for 25 years and we'd just been hit with another huge road block. With both of us out of work, there was no way we could justify having a baby right away. We both knew it was the most logical decision, but, that didn't make it hurt any less. 

Making the best of things

There were days it took every ounce of effort just to get out of bed. We couldn't understand why we had just recovered from one tragedy, only to be faced with another one four days later. Brett and I wanted to become parents so badly. We'd faced such stress and all we wanted was to be able to celebrate overcoming his sickness by becoming pregnant. We weren't even bothered by not having jobs, we were heartbroken that it meant we'd have to continue with not trying to conceive. 

Fast-forward three months....Brett and I are finally on the road to trying to conceive again. We're hoping, trying and planning for a 2010 baby. And we both agree that all of our obstacles happened for a reason. As a couple, we're even stronger than we ever thought we could be. And we're going to be able to teach our future child that any problem can be fixed with strength and perseverance.  We're going to be able to show him or her that through the toughest of times, Mommy and Daddy never faltered. We are going to be even better parents now that we've seen that life isn't as easy as we'd all like it to be. We know there's nothing we can't handle together, as a family. And those are the things we've wanted to teach our children all along. Now we have the true life examples to prove it.  

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