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11-30-2012 at 3:32 PM
GnomeSweet...
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GnomeSweetGnome is not online. Last active: 05-23-2013, 6:52 PMSilver

If you had an adoption shower

when was it in relation to your journey?  People are already asking me if we're going to be having a shower, and I'm sure at least one person will offer to host one for me, but I don't know what the best time would be.

I'm feeling very at peace with our IF journey at this point and am starting to accumulate a few little baby things on my own, so I was thinking of having a shower as soon as we're home study approved/on the wait list.  Does that seem appropriate?
 
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11-30-2012 at 3:36 PM
Hav=Fath
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We had 3 given for us when Hadley was about 1 month old, I for sure wanted to make sure that she was actually going to be placed with us (I was so afraid that her bmom would choose to parent) and it took a few weeks to get it organized and planned.
photo DSC06446_zps6e2b2173.jpg Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
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11-30-2012 at 3:45 PM
raechelebl...
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raecheleblue1 is not online. Last active: 05-22-2013, 8:43 PMBronze

We waited until after DD was placed with us.  Actually planning them now for Jan.  

 So excited for you getting so close.  I remember when you first started posting, I think it was around the same time I did...way earlier this year.  Yay!!! 
TTC since March 2010, BFP #1 11.09.10, possible ectopic, m/c 12.14.10 (10w)
Clomid + TI=BFN, IUIs 1-3= BFN
Application for domestic adoption submitted 4/18/12, matched 8/12/12, DD born 10/31/12
“Dum Spiro Spero", "While I breathe, I hope".

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11-30-2012 at 3:48 PM
GnomeSweet...
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raecheleblue1:

 So excited for you getting so close.  I remember when you first started posting, I think it was around the same time I did...way earlier this year.  Yay!!! 

I'm so excited, too! :)  Congrats on your baby - just precious. :)

 
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11-30-2012 at 3:54 PM
kgs0505
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Ours were after M came home.  I didn't want one before because I felt uncertain.  It's good we did it that way because the first match fell through, and M was last minute anyway.  We had purchased while we were going thru the homestudy the crib, mattress, dresser, carseat, and stroller.  And I had a "go pack" of stuff, like 3 bottles, a couple blankets, and some newborn and 0-3 month gender neutral clothes.  Everything else i figured we could buy wherever we ended up.  It really was plenty of stuff.  newborns in a hotel room don't need much.
TTC since May 2006. After 3 failed Clomid cycles, 2 failed Injectibles/IUIs, 2 failed IVFs and 1 failed FET, we movied on to adoption!
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Last ditch FET resulted in BFP! And identical twin girls! Lilypie First Birthday tickers 
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11-30-2012 at 3:54 PM
lafayetteg...
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We have had several offers from people to host a shower, but I am glad that we waited. We thought we would have been matched by now and, sadly, we have not. I've accumulated some items here and there, but what I have really focused on is creating a wish list at Amazon.com. That list is marked private and is an assortment of everything I may want or need. When we do finally get a match, I will have the registry list all ready to go because I've been working on it.

 Everyone is different in terms of what makes them comfortable, but the adoption journey is also different for everyone. It is already a little hard to walk past the nursery (which is not totally complete) and see the small collection of items we have. I dread to think how I would feel if a shower had already occurred and we had a nursery full of stuff that has yet to be used.

Like I said, everyone is different. I like going to my private Amazon.com baby registry and adding items and doing research on them. 

Good luck!

 
Cervical Cancer Survivor since 2007 TTC Since 2008 IUI#1 = BFN IUI#2 = BFN IUI#3 = BFN IUI#4 = BFN IVF #1 = BFN FET #1 = BFN FET #2 = BFN FET #3 = BFN IVF #2 = BFN IVF #3 = BFN FET #4 = BFN FET #5 = BFP!!! 06/10/2011 Miscarriage 06/21/2011 Adoption Application Submitted 09/2011, Personal Documents Submitted 11/18/2011, Home Visit 12/16/2011, Officially Waiting!!! 01/21/2013 MATCHED!!!! 01/24/2013 Baby Boy Born! Lilypie First Birthday tickers 
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11-30-2012 at 3:58 PM
lafayetteg...
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Oh - here is what we do have so far:

Crib, mattress, changing table/dresser, car seat, stroller frame, and a "go bag" that contains a couple of diapers, wipes, 3 dressing gowns, 3 swaddle blankets, 2-3 burp clothes, and a couple of starter bottles.

If you want a list of what was suggested to go into our "go bag", PM me and I'll send it to you.

Cervical Cancer Survivor since 2007 TTC Since 2008 IUI#1 = BFN IUI#2 = BFN IUI#3 = BFN IUI#4 = BFN IVF #1 = BFN FET #1 = BFN FET #2 = BFN FET #3 = BFN IVF #2 = BFN IVF #3 = BFN FET #4 = BFN FET #5 = BFP!!! 06/10/2011 Miscarriage 06/21/2011 Adoption Application Submitted 09/2011, Personal Documents Submitted 11/18/2011, Home Visit 12/16/2011, Officially Waiting!!! 01/21/2013 MATCHED!!!! 01/24/2013 Baby Boy Born! Lilypie First Birthday tickers 
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11-30-2012 at 4:13 PM
dholsapp
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We had a shower a month before BM was due...but I was very confident that she was going to place and not change her mind. At first I was against any type of shower before like most other people due to fear, but once I was comfortable with BM I went ahead and gave in! 
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker TTC since June 2009 01/10- Femara 03/10- Femara 07/2010- Clomid with injectables and IUI #1 08/2010- IUI #2 06/2011- IVF #1 BFP! 09/2011- Miscarriage at 10 1/2 weeks 11/2011- FET 01/2012- Start Home Study process 03/2012- Home Study approved and now waiting on our child to find us! 07/2012- matched with a BM who is due in October! 11/10/12- our son is born! 11/13/12- court grants us custody! 12/28/12- finalization! Always ours in our hearts, but.now also ours forever! http://keepingupwiththejoneses-dana.blogspot.com/ 
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11-30-2012 at 4:33 PM
Julie721
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dholsapp:
We had a shower a month before BM was due...but I was very confident that she was going to place and not change her mind. At first I was against any type of shower before like most other people due to fear, but once I was comfortable with BM I went ahead and gave in! 

This almost exactly, and it was with only intimate friends. We had a bigger "meet the baby" bbq a few weeks after bringing him home. 


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November 2011: after nearly two years of infertility, we are moving on to domestic infant adoption.
February 2012: Matched!
May 2012: Placed with our son!
 
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11-30-2012 at 4:47 PM
jillianmb
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We had one after we met our son but before our court approval. It was a bit "risky" because of the chance we would not be approved to adopt him, but I wanted to enjoy the season of anticipation like an expectant mom would so to me it was worth the risk.

TTC September 2010 thru October 2011
SA February 2011: Normal
RE App. October 2011 - Recc. Clomid and IUI

Taking a break from TTC to pursue adoption

Met our 2 year old son in Russia July 2012!
Court trip October 2012
Home November 24 2012!

adoption blog: addingaburden.com

Adding a Burden
 
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11-30-2012 at 6:14 PM
crene84
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We had a "meet the baby" shower just recently, when DD was 8 weeks old.  We focused on toddler gifts (clothing, learning toys, etc).  It was a lot of fun, having DD there!

Having said that, we did consider a pre-baby shower, but everything happened so quickly for us.  If you can handle it emotionally, I say go for it! 

Married Since 09/2006, TTC Since 09/2010
DX: Unexplained infertility, DH normal
3 Femara cycles - Oct, Nov, Dec 2011, all BFNs
IVF #1, ER 2/15 (5R, 4M, 4F), ET 2/18, Beta 2/29 = BFN :(
Follistim + IUI on 6/25 = BFN
Home Study Finalized 8/14/12! Profile Active - 8/17/12!
Officially Matched 8/29/12, Our perfect angel born 9/25/12!
Biggest surprise ever, unexpected BFP on 4/12/13!

Our Angel through Adoption
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11-30-2012 at 8:20 PM
silliestbu...
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In my opinion, you have two choices...

1-  Either wait and have a meet and greet w/a new baby which can be special and wonderful

 or

2-  Schedule one early before you are matched.

 

I'd shy away from doing one for a specific baby you are matched with because of all the risks... and having lived through failed matches, it would have been tough to have presents specifically for a baby if it didn't work out.  KWIM?
Best friends and sisters... 24 months and 16 months 
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11-30-2012 at 9:46 PM
lizlemon2
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We are having our shower tomorrow.  We waited until someone asked us, and were homestudy approved and matched.
Adoption Blog Updated 2/15 
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11-30-2012 at 10:39 PM
Dr.Loretta
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It's really up to you.

Someone at my work wanted to throw me one when we were matched. Unfortunately (for her) we were matched with a baby already born, so no shower until after she came home. MIL threw one for us when DD was 7 weeks old. It was a blast.

If you're OK with doing one pre-TPR, go for it.
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Our little Irish rose came to us on March 5, 2010
Don't drink the water.
Disclaimer: I am not an MD. Please don't PM me with pregnancy-related questions. Ask your doctor. 
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11-30-2012 at 11:06 PM
steph196
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We waited to have a shower until after Sydney was home. They ended up being when she was about 3-4 weeks old. I didn't feel comfortable having a shower before her BM signed. 
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She's Forever Ours! Finaliaztion-12.26.12Image and video hosting by TinyPic http://hehasaplanforus.blogspot.com/ 
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12-01-2012 at 11:03 AM
sarahtoled...
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We are hoping to have a big, celebratory shower after we're home study approved and before matching.  Like Jillian, we would like to enjoy the expecting part.  We've tried for so long and had so many disappointments...  I really want the happy expectation.  :)
My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

TTC #1 @ 38, Dx: ovulation issues
15 treatment cycles: c/p 4/11, m/c 12/11 (6w), possible ectopic + MTX 4/12 (7w)
Another c/p in 12/12

Moving forward with domestic infant adoption! 
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12-01-2012 at 6:32 PM
orangecupc...
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orangecupcake is not online. Last active: 05-23-2013, 6:48 PMNewbie
I had one with friends/family after DD was home, about 3 weeks old. I had one at work when DD was about 1.5 months, just before returning to work.
I became a mother because of adoption. She is the absolute love of my life. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker formerly known as sw_in_kc 
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12-01-2012 at 10:47 PM
summergirl...
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summergirl79 is not online. Last active: 05-23-2013, 7:16 PMNewbie
We had 2 showers after we came home with DS- also wanted to wait since it was such an unknown time period, but started our registry early- everyone is different though so if it feels right to you, then go for it!
 
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12-03-2012 at 4:43 PM
maryoosa
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As a superstitious italian-American girl we won't be having a show until the baby is born, placed, and the tpr is signed...so probably will do it about two months after baby is born. 

 

 
 
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