Hi, I know how you feel. I got Post Partum OCD after my first and raising my 2 kids was very hard with OCD. But I must say if you can hang in there it is so worth it.
Get some help to come in once in awhile and take some much needed time for yourself. The thing that may help you the most right now is something I use. They are MP3 downloads from this company Journeys Inward Hypnotherapy. They are extremely relaxing and you can listen to them with headphones while your babies are sleeping. I know you will enjoy the angelic nurturing voice as well as the extra effects that make you feel like you are at the beach or somewhere in nature.
Besides this one on post partum depression they have some good ones on stress and anxiety and a bunch of relaxation ones. Good luck!