I'm really sorry. That's the worst, and I agree that holidays are the hardest time. I've been trying this year to do things just because I like doing them, not because we have kids to do this stuff for.
This is going to sound really weird, and please don't think I'm telling you to do this, but another thing I've been doing is thinking about all the ways my life is better than people who have kids right now. My SIL is a particularly annoying person (she drunkenly slurred "you guys are going to have babies soon I know it" during Thanksgiving) and I picture her holidays. She's running around all the time, not getting to relax and cook or watch a bunch of cheesy movies like I've been doing and cuddling with the DH.
Now, I'd trade my relaxing holidays for a hectic one with kids any day (in fact, I'm actively trying to do that right now), but it makes me feel a little better to picture this not as a "childless infertile depressing holiday season" but as my last days of freedom.
Also, I don't think there's anything wrong with setting up an IVF fund for Christmas so that people who ask what you'd like can donate to the fund instead of buying you presents you don't need or want. I like the idea!