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12-22-2012 at 8:01 PM
Strawberry...
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Joined on 02-17-2008
New Jersey
1,704 Posts
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Strawberryglobug is not online. Last active: 06-18-2013, 5:52 PMBronze

I was actually at peace

My cousin/best friend gave birth to a beautiful little boy last night. Being that we were pregnant and due with our son in March I was a nervous about visiting the hospital because.. well our loss was in September at 17 weeks but some days it still feels so fresh. I was afraid holding her son would make my heart break again.

Surprisingly it was okay and I actually felt at peace. I think it is largely in part to the positive route our adoption path is currently on. As I held him and looked down at his little sleepy face I knew for the first time in a long time that someday I will be holding a son or daughter of our own and I will get this experience even if it's in the 'non-traditional' way as my MIL has come to refer to it.  ::eye roll::



TTC since June 2010
#1 MMC 9/7/10 @8w1d)D&C
#2 Loss 3/5/11 @14w5d (cystic hygroma and hydrops) D&E
#3 Loss 7/21/11 @10w2d (cystic hygroma and hydrops)D&C
#4 MMC 11/28/11 @9w6d D&C x2
#5 Loss 9/25/12 @17w (21 mm cystic hygroma and hydroma)D&E
Repeat D&E due to excessive left over POC = torn cervix
DX: MTHFR & APS (anticardiolipin IgA)
All genetics clear on DH & I
Cannot determine genetic link so IVF with PGD is out
Moving on to Adoption!!! 
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12-22-2012 at 8:11 PM
dholsapp
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Joined on 09-22-2007
Indiana
593 Posts
11,361 Points
dholsapp is not online. Last active: 06-19-2013, 9:54 AMBronze
Totally understand reaching that point where you become okay again with being around other people's babies! It's such a relief in a way to lose all the negative feelings and know that you are on the right path for you now! And I am rolling my eyes at you MIL also! Lol
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker TTC since June 2009 01/10- Femara 03/10- Femara 07/2010- Clomid with injectables and IUI #1 08/2010- IUI #2 06/2011- IVF #1 BFP! 09/2011- Miscarriage at 10 1/2 weeks 11/2011- FET 01/2012- Start Home Study process 03/2012- Home Study approved and now waiting on our child to find us! 07/2012- matched with a BM who is due in October! 11/10/12- our son is born! 11/13/12- court grants us custody! 12/28/12- finalization! Always ours in our hearts, but.now also ours forever! http://keepingupwiththejoneses-dana.blogspot.com/ 
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12-22-2012 at 9:26 PM
DaisyZH
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Joined on 05-08-2012
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DaisyZH is not online. Last active: 06-19-2013, 10:58 AMSilver
(( Hugs )) I'm glad it went well for you, that is not an easy thing to handle.  Peace is an amazing feeling.  Also majorly eye-rolling and shaking my head at your MIL.
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFruit Ticker  
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12-23-2012 at 8:38 AM
lizlemon2
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Joined on 10-20-2012
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lizlemon2 is not online. Last active: 06-18-2013, 5:16 PMNewbie
Glad you are in that place.  Best of luck in the waiting.
Adoption Blog Updated 2/15 
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