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12-23-2012 at 12:52 PM
gbaby26
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gbaby26 is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 6:52 PMNewbie

announcing pregnancy/ family member passing

Hi everyone, I am almost 16 weeks and only our immediate family is aware. I wanted to announce this week on facebook with it being Christmas and all. However my cousin passed away Friday night with a long struggle of fighting cancer. I know he would be so happy for me but I feel guilty being happy about sharing the news at this time. Should I wait, or should I post my announcement. I was really close to him if that matters, and his services are this week....just looking for advice on this situation. I feel stupid even contemplating such a thing when my cousin has lost his life, but I just dont know how I should feel at this time...
 
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12-23-2012 at 1:00 PM
MeghanKG
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I'm sorry about your cousin. I would announce it, but include something about your cousin while doing so. Make it a point to tell people that you wish he could have met the baby, and how you know he would have been so great with the baby, etc. Maybe even honor him by using his name or a similar name as a middle name if you were close to him? I think it's important to remember that although your family is going through a terrible time dealing with this loss, your baby is a new life that deserves to be celebrated too. I don't think any family would think you are trying to downplay their loss.
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12-23-2012 at 1:02 PM
MeghanKG
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Edited...

I just noticed he passed away only a couple days ago. I would probably wait until after the services to respect people's time to grieve.
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12-23-2012 at 1:19 PM
ariaforte8
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I would wait until all of the services are over and people have had some time to greive. Even if people want to be happy for you, it's hard to overcome the grief.

I'm sorry for your loss.

^ The Doctor Explains My Pregnancy Cravings ^
My son is due June 13, 2013! -ariaforte8 
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12-23-2012 at 1:25 PM
BC&LM
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I would wait a week or so.
 
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12-23-2012 at 1:49 PM
WifeofaCom...
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That's a tough call. I think I agree with the other comments that you should maybe wait until the services are done. It's such a difficult thing for any family to go through, and it's especially painful during the Holidays. I'm sorry for your loss. I'm sure your family will find happiness and excitement for you after they've had closure with your cousin's passing.
~*~TTCAL May Siggy Challenge: Favorite Flower - Irises~*~ photo images_zps9870d123.jpg Lilypie Trying to Conceive 15 to 80 day cycle tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers photo dzcq2p_zps234f696a.gif Natural miscarriage @ 8 weeks - 3/8/2005; Big Brother "Skippy" born - 2/28/2007; Chemical pregnancy @ 4 weeks - 5/1/2012; Missed miscarriage - Clarice Bird Higgins C. - D&E @ 11 weeks - 8/8/2012; Henrietta June Iris C. - born sleeping @ 19 weeks - 1/15/2013  
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12-23-2012 at 2:16 PM
Kelli3
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MeghanKG:
Edited... I just noticed he passed away only a couple days ago. I would probably wait until after the services to respect people's time to grieve.
I agree with this.
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12-23-2012 at 2:23 PM
mjune3881
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I would wait and announce around New Years. 
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12-23-2012 at 4:07 PM
MegStory17
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ariaforte8:
I would wait until all of the services are over and people have had some time to greive. Even if people want to be happy for you, it's hard to overcome the grief. I'm sorry for your loss.

This.

 I am also so sorry for your loss.  
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12-23-2012 at 4:23 PM
QueSyrah
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I would wait until after the service. I also don't think you need to include anything about your cousin in your announcement.
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12-23-2012 at 6:47 PM
Aim&Rich
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I'm sorry for your loss. I also think New Year's might be a better time to announce. It gives people some time to start grieving, and the new year brings new life idea might be comforting.

MIL passed away in April, and we are lucky to have had this much time before announcing. We are going to a family party for that side of the family and I think it will be welcomed. But I couldn't imagine doing it only a few days after, if we had been in that situation.

 
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12-23-2012 at 9:12 PM
lindsayand...
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mjune3881:
I would wait and announce around New Years. 

 I agree... then you could do some kind of "new year, new beginnings" thing about the new journey or something... might be best to wait a little while. 
 
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12-23-2012 at 10:30 PM
QueSyrah
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lindsayandwillis:

mjune3881:
I would wait and announce around New Years. 

 I agree... then you could do some kind of "new year, new beginnings" thing about the new journey or something... might be best to wait a little while. 

I like this idea. 

If you're worried about showing and family members finding out at the funeral, I wouldn't stress over it.

DH's dad died days after we got engaged and we hadn't had a chance to really tell anyone yet. At his funeral several people noticed my ring and started asking about it. I hadn't even met anyone yet so I thought it would be really awkward, but it gave people a chance to smile on what was otherwise a really difficult day.
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12-25-2012 at 10:19 AM
jmcgra06
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Can you talk to your immediate family who already knows about the pregnancy and get some advice? I thought it would be so strange for this to come up after my grandmother's funeral, but my mom told my aunts who rapidly spread it around and they all said they would have been hurt if we had withheld happy news on that kind of day. So, I guess every family is different!
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