Attachment Parenting

I don't think she enjoys bed sharing

chizekgeena — Thu, 16 May 2013 14:04:18 GMT

I need help! Our daughter is almost 9 months and we have bed shared since day 1. She starts off the night in her pack n play and then when we go to bed around 10 she will start wiggling and wanting to come in with us. After this she will usually fall asleep by nursing. During the night she will literally toss and turn and whimper even though it appears she is still sleeping. She was teething a few weeks ago but this has been going on for the last 2 months and now that her teeth have broken through she continues to toss and turn. The only way I can get her to stop is by nursing her which means she is on my boob pretty much the entire night. Is this a sign that she doesn't sleep well with us? How do I even go about with getting her into her crib in another room? Will I need to night wean also if she nurses for comfort. I am so confused! I initially wanted to have a huge family bed with all of our (future) babies all sleeping together but this goes against all those plans. I slept with my parents till I was 7 years old and then I was moved to a sibling bed so having my daughter in her own bed all night is such a foreign idea to me. Help ladies!

Study linking SIDS risk to bedsharing

mb314 — Tue, 21 May 2013 13:44:38 GMT

I'm sure some of you follow different studies more than I do. I'm curious as to what people have to say about this, and how it could be countered.

http://news.yahoo.com/co-sleeping-baby-raises-sids-risk-111943047.html

High chair

Danni7535 — Mon, 20 May 2013 23:56:45 GMT

Hi everyone,

I need more advice from this board. I just read the BLW book in preparation for introducing solids. My baby will be 6 months old June 4th. Anyway, I know that according to the book you can begin solids by having the baby sit on your lap at the table, but I'd also like to have a high chair ready to go. I would love to hear your recommendations for high chairs. So, what high chair do you have and do you like it? Keep in mind we have a small space. I want something easy to clean too. Also, do any of you have the Fisher Price Space Saver chair? Is it true that it doesn't adjust completely vertically? I want something vertical for BLW, right? TIA!

Sorry - I'm sure you get this a lot - Ring Slings

opaque1997 — Fri, 24 May 2013 16:00:22 GMT

I tried looking through the board..

I have an 8 month old - and I use the ergo a lot, and we have a pouch sling that I used a lot when she was younger and I've used here and there lately - but I'm starting to see the benifits of an adjustable sling - for hip carry, snuggle in close.. adjust as I lose weight, etc.

Obviously there is the Maya wrap - are there different styles - or are they all different brands / fabric / rings - but the same basic styles. Are there pros / cons? I know to get one that is made by a 'reputable' source - especially since I'm likely to use it with our next baby as an infant and worry about the suffocation, etc

XP: Dec 2013 Need advice. Circumcision related.

EmmaBoBemma — Fri, 24 May 2013 17:40:22 GMT

This is a hot hopic, I know. I don't want to cause problems, I am just looking for advice from ladies who are currently researching circumcision. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I did a ton of research (before we found out it was a girl, of course) on circumcision. In my mind and heart, I don't feel like it is something that I could put a future son through. When I try to talk about it with DH, he says he wants to wait and research it himself before we have a conversation about it. I understand this, because I am much more informed on the topic than he is, so I am giving him his space to research it himself. The problem is, he doesn't have time to research it. If I find articles, or websites about it, they're typically biased. I was wondering if anyone knew of an article(or more) that isn't biased on this topic?

Another issue I have, is if he decides that it's still something that he wants to do for our future son, what am I going to do?! haha I am nervous that it's going to be something he feels strong about. I feel very strong about NOT circ'ing. I don't hate on anyone who does it, it's just that I know I won't be able to send my newborn son to an operating room to be circ'd. I just can't. So my other question is, Is there anyone who has a son, who went through the same thing with their SO? You both had different opinions on the topic, and you obviously had to make a choice...so what did you do?! help!!

I don't want to be controlling, and say "this is what is going to happen no matter what", but I don't want to just roll over on this, either.

Also, I am going to be really busy within the hour and I may not make it back to this post today. But if anyone responds, I promise I am not ignoring the responses, I will be back.

TIA. !!

Making time for your spouse

LibraryChica — Wed, 22 May 2013 13:34:31 GMT

DH and I both work fulltime. Well, he works way more than fulltime. Last night we got in a huge fight about his hours. I know he is trying. Maybe it will get better, but he is self employed so it isn't like he can just take off. My point is, how do you balance the needs of your marriage with the needs of your LO or LOs? My mother has offered to take DD one night a week overnight so we can have a date night, but I feel so guilty as I see her so rarely as it is. Woud you do it or would you ride these early years out? FWIW, she is almost 1.5 years.

ETA: DH and I stagger our schedules to maximize time with DD, which is part of the reason we have so little time together.

WIC Office

rainbwbby1 — Tue, 21 May 2013 22:58:52 GMT

Lurker: I took a friend of mine to the WIC office today. While I was waiting, I read the posters on the wall. One of the posters said that cosleeeping increases SIDS by 40 times. It went on to liken cosleeping to child abuse and said that you should call the child abuse hotline to report these activities. Needless to say I was upset at reading this. My friend cosleeps with her 11 month old and I plan to cosleep with my baby.

?s for co sleepers with toddler

mpstochlinski8 — Fri, 24 May 2013 01:42:41 GMT

I have almost 19mth old twins and we share a queen mattress on the floor of their room. We started out with cribs and me on a futon next to them but they were up constantly and I just kept taking turns bringing them to bed with me to I finally bought a bigger mattress for us to share. We all sleep better now and I LOVE co sleeping full time with them.

My question is to those of you who co sleep, do you use sleepsacks/wearable blankets for LO or a blanket or are they under the same blanket as you? I sleep between them since they usually want to nurse at some point here and there thru the night and I"m also thinking its fair that I sleep next to each of them. Right now they are in sleepsacks and I keep a small blanket for myself but with the warmer weather coming its sometimes hot when I lay them down and gets colder later on in the night so I'd like to skip the sleepsack and start using a light blanket or sheet so it can easily be placed on them if needed etc...I tried one night and every time they moved so did the blanket. Wondering how you all handle this? TIA :)

Diaper Bags and Baby Wearing

Hail123 — Thu, 23 May 2013 15:37:28 GMT

I'm pregnant with my first and I really love the idea of baby wearing. I already have a few slings/wraps/carriers picked out.

My question to you lovely ladies is this - What kind of diaper bag works best when you're using a baby carrier?

What have your experiences been?

Thanks!

Do you homeschool?

mpstochlinski8 — Thu, 23 May 2013 02:02:58 GMT

We are thinking that we may want to homeschool our twins, curious if you do what sort of schedule if any you have, do you use some sort of program? I have done some research on it but still feel confused on how it actually works

TIA

Potty Training

chrismo1013 — Thu, 23 May 2013 03:33:23 GMT

Can anyone recommend a book to start with? My almost 2 year seems ready in that she understands what the potty is for and she hates being changed. The only issue is that she seems to be fearful of going on the potty (she can sit on it just fine). Anyway, I've heard about a three day training thing, but I'm not sure if that's legit. Any input is appreciated.

Weaning....

Elbug — Thu, 23 May 2013 02:49:45 GMT

My daughter is 18 months. She's entirely dropped all nursing sessions except the before bedtime one on her own (plus a tiny bit of mother led weaning by not offering throughtout the day). Anyone with experience have any recs for helping her wean that last feed? Its really bittersweet and I'm not even sure I'll end up pushing for her to wean since allowing her to wean on her own has been so easy. Its just hard when I work swing shifts and my husband has to put her to sleep. It ends up being a battle even if he offers a bottle (which I sort of want to avoid). Thoughts? I know some toddlers don't wean naturally until they're well over 2. I'm not sure I'm up for waiting until then. Sadly I feel that way somewhat because of pressure..... hate to admit that but its certainly a thought on my mind. Other reason is sometimes I just feel done. That sounds selfish but its true. I love my nursing relationship though.... gosh I sound crazy don't I (I love, I'm done, I'm not done, time to wean, don't wean, aahhhh....)

We're also looking to hopefully get pregant soon and am considering just waiting until my supply drops naturally and changes flavor. She might just wean on her own then and I won't have to worry about it.

Attachment parenting?

doodlebuggmommy — Thu, 23 May 2013 21:01:52 GMT

Hi, I am not sure I understand what attachment is. What does it mean? What does it entail? Just curious

interested in attachment parenting

mga1015 — Thu, 16 May 2013 01:30:19 GMT

hello everyone!

i am 20 weeks pregnant with my first child (a baby boy) and i am very interested in attachment parenting from what i have heard about about it so far. but, i would love to know about attachment parenting from a mother who has experienced it herself. so, what is attachment parenting to you? what different things do you do to be considered attachment parenting? also, what are the greatest benefits? would you recommend it? and lastly, even if i don't co sleep with my baby past 3 or 4 months, can i still attachment parent effectively? thanks ladies!

Does she cry too much?

starshineamator — Thu, 16 May 2013 23:28:46 GMT

So my baby was born 10 days ago (haven't updated my ticker yet, this is the first time I've been on!) and I'm still adjusting to being a new mom. I'm concerned constantly that I'm doing it wrong and that I'm not very good at this. One thing that I'm really struggling with is her crying. I don't want her to cry, and I try to respond to her needs immediately, but it can be really difficult. For instance, she'll start crying to be fed while I'm in the bathroom, or in the middle of changing her diaper. And since we've been struggling with breastfeeding, I have to unlatch her to try again pretty frequently, and she gets impatient and frustrated very easily and will cry while she's right there and I'm trying to feed her. Or when I have to interrupt her eating to burp her. I feel like she cries too often and she isn't learning to trust, and I'm terrified that she is feeling like nobody is coming or nobody cares.

I also don't feel like she's particularly cuddly. Maybe I'm just doing it wrong, but she seems pretty satisfied on her tummy or propped up in the breastfeeding pillow. She also loves car rides, and will stay in the car seat forever, perfectly happy, if we leave her in there. My mom (who is here helping us out) keeps saying that she wants to eat all the time to be soothed/cuddled, but if that were the case, wouldn't me (or someone) just holding her be enough? I have a Baby K'tan wrap but I haven't really had the time to figure out how it works and use it to wear her yet, and my mom has put this crazy fear in me that the baby will be too cold and get sick if she isn't bundled up in clothes and blankets at all times, so I haven't really been doing skin-to-skin with her as much as I'd like.

Spouse keeps telling me that its ok and babies just cry to communicate, but i know crying is a late sign of hunger so i really feel like i'm doing it wrong. Sometimes she makes what i think are hunger signals but it ends up being something else (like she needs to burp or poop). maybe i'm just being silly but this is all really important to me and i could use some encouragement and support/advice.

sorry for the bad grammar/spelling- typing with one hand!

Should I worry about baby becoming overheated in carrier

KMEss86 — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:02:28 GMT

My dd is due in July and it can get very hot here. I take walks with my son (in the stroller) everyday and plant to continue when the baby is born. I have a Moby and an Ergo. I know both can get hot. I'm just thinking about if it may be unsafe to wrap a baby up close to me like that when it is really hot out. Should I opt for the double stroller, or maybe look into a cooler wrap/ sling? I'm not really concerned about me being hot, just the baby. Thanks for your input.

Carrier for hot weather?

jcar2 — Mon, 20 May 2013 18:11:02 GMT

Now that its getting into warmer weather, what kind of carrier is cool enough to wear your LO around? DS is 3 months old about 15 weeks I think and we're thinking of going to the zoo sometime as DH wants to see an exhibit there that just opened. DS hates his carseat so there's no way to put him in a stroller that whole time. I use a moby around the house and for walks, usually near or during nap time. However the money's fabric seems like it would get extremely hot if we were outside for a period of time. Any recommendations? Does the moby work well in summer?

new to attachment parenting

LBF DPT — Wed, 22 May 2013 00:10:07 GMT

Before my, now almost 10 month old son was born, I swore in the crib in his room from day one. Well do to health and feeding issues, we turned to the rock and play. Once he was too big for the rock and play we tried the crib.
Long story short we have tried crib, reclined chair, floor, crib again and now appear to bed share.
Everyone I talk to talks about SIDS and bed sharing especially since he is a belly sleeper.
What to believe? Do you ladies think we need to push the crib for my son who sleeps a h all of alloy better with us in bed on his belly?
Also been bottle / formula fed since 4 months.
Sorry for the format...on my phone

Bed sharing

99frontier — Sun, 19 May 2013 13:32:31 GMT

K has been a terrible sleeper all along. I tried the No Cry Sleep Solution a while back. Last week I started the Sleep Lady Shuffle...no go. K cried for an hour and a half and ended up passing out on my cheek when I leaned in to hug him. Broke my heart!! The next few nights weren't much better. Now, DH and I discussed CIO but still aren't comfortable with it. So we are going to look into bed sharing. So my questions...
What is a good resource for bed sharing info?
How do you bed share safely with a crawler and baby that can pull to standing? [he is 9 months]
Do I need bed rails and any recommendations?
Anything else I need to consider?
TIA!!

Bedtime help needed!

AmyNicole622 — Wed, 22 May 2013 12:16:21 GMT

I mostly lurk around SAHM and AP boards since I feel I relate to both. I need some advice or experience on our bedtime "problem"
Our 2 year old has a current bedtime routine of milk, stories, singing and then sleep. Either my H or I lay with him until he falls asleep. We tried a few times to break this habit but he would literally freak out and say "scared." I'm saying big tears and that petrified look and cry. We tried the "be right back" and he melts down. I have no trouble keeping up our normal routine but with a newborn now, it's going to get very hard when I do bedtime by myself. What would be the AP stance on this? I want him to feel safe and secure but independent enough to sleep on his own. I know they aren't little for long and willing I tough it out if need be.

K'tan wrong size?

kballou — Sat, 11 May 2013 23:04:11 GMT

I just got my k'tan and ordered it based on my pre-pregnancy size, but feel like it might be too big. DS seems to be sitting too low, what do you think?

Please ignore how terrible this picture is

Making your own woven

Nana_Osaki06 — Wed, 22 May 2013 20:42:22 GMT

What fabric do I need? I was thinking linen, but an not sure. Also, how long should I make it? I'm kind of fluffy right now at 250lbs (I need to lose the baby weight). Lastly, what about this fabric??

http://www.joann.com/specialty-linen-watercolor-purple-blue-/zprd_12038188a/

Talk to me about gauze wraps (PIP)

Runaway22 — Mon, 20 May 2013 21:27:17 GMT

Ever used one? Have any pros/cons to share?

I recently got 5 1/2 yards of 100% cotton gauze fabric to use as a DIY wrap. The length is great, and I love how light and breathable it is, esp. compared to the Moby. However, I'm wondering if it's maybe too thin? I have to adjust the fabric over my shoulders a bit, and tie it pretty tight (which I think is normal), so it's not crazy comfortable, but it works fine. My concern is mainly for LO's comfort. Can a too-thin wrap hurt him? He's used to being worn in the Moby, and doesn't really fuss when he's in the gauze wrap, but he's also really laid back and isn't one to fuss much anyway. Also, his little fat rolls on his legs have crease marks from the fabric when I take him out. I'm just a newb and don't know what's normal and ok vs. what's not

Right now I'm using the full width of the fabric folded over on itself (like a Moby) for extra support. You can see my fingers through a single layer here:

WDYT? Too thin or ok?

Crying baby?

MBush4 — Mon, 20 May 2013 18:06:06 GMT

Recently a few people have lectured me for being a "wimp" and not letting my 3 month old cry. Their reasoning is that I pick him up too soon which will make him unable to self-sooth and dependent. But in my mind, at 14 weeks he's still learning who he can trust and not trust. But now I worry that I may be too quick to respond. Of course there are times I let him cry a little (3-5 minutes max) but should I let him go longer? I like attachment parenting ideas because I think it is vital for children to know their needs will be met and that they are loved. But I don't want to coddle my baby. Please tell me I'm not messing stuff up...

DH cute!

Nana_Osaki06 — Wed, 22 May 2013 03:22:43 GMT

So, the original arrangement was to have DS sleep in our bed or the cosleeper till 6-7 months like his sister did (I was single then). I told DH we should probably start thinking of setting up the nursery soon. He then told me he doesn't want to switch DS into his own bed or room till a year now. He likes having him in bed with us! I love hearing my skeptical DH say these things!