My old boss, who is like a second mom to me called last week to offer, so she will be throwing it and mine will be in January, I'm due in March.  I don't want to be to big at my shower!

I just caught word from SO that his mother told him not to let me buy alot of stuff because I will be getting a baby shower. When, I don't know. I am not asking her...

My SIL and friend offered to host a shower as soon as I found out I was pregnant - they were really excited!  If your cousin and sister are offering/want to host I don't see any reason why you should decline.  You could just explain to your MIL that she will be able to enjoy being the grandma to be at the shower instead of the host.  GL!

My sister is throwing my shower and it's January 30th (I'm due March 21st).  Two weeks before sounds awfully last minute!  I would say let your cousin and sis do it!  It sounds like they have a better idea of what you want and will listen to your guest list suggestions!

I would take your cousin and sister up on their offer to throw a shower.  If you MIL wants to throw you another later she can do that, but two weeks before your due date is a little late.  I would be worried I might already have a baby by then!

My mom, step-mom and SIL are throwing mine.  It's 2 1/2 months before I'm due.

I'd let the cousin and sister go ahead and do it.  If your MIL wants to have one for you 2 weeks before your due date, let her, but you'll have already had one.  Could you invite your fam to the one that cousin and sister throw and have your MIL throw the one for DH's family?
Mine is being hosted by my bff at my Mom's house (bff lives about two hours away from where I grew up and know people.)

My aunt is throwing my shower, which she asked if she could do pretty much right after finding out I'm pregnant. It will be in January or February (I'm due April 4), and we're just trying to find a date that works best with my closest family members right now.

I don't know what to tell you about your situation. Since your cousin and sister are the only ones who have actually offered to throw your shower (sounds like MIL is hedging, maybe hoping someone else steps up?), and if you think that will make everything a little smoother with family relations (for cripes sake, your own mom and sister should get to be at your shower!) then by all means let them throw it. If your MIL then wants to get upset about it, let her throw a separate shower for you with her side of the family, and if you have the baby early before her late, late shower, well, as the saying goes: that will learn her.

My step mom is hosting along with my mother and mother in law. 

The issues you are worried about:  MIL is crazy, your shower does not have to be 2 weeks before your due date.  You want to be comfortable and enjoy your shower.  I'd tell your cousin and sis to throw your shower.  

Definitely let your sis and cousin plan a shower.  They can still invite your MIL and her side of the family if they want to and then you can be sure it's when you want it!!  If MIL says anything to you, just say that your family is flying to be here for your shower so your sis and cousin needed to plan well in advance.  I think that's totally acceptable!  GL!

I would definitely take your sister and cousin up on their offer to throw you one. I'm due in early March and my two SILs are throwing me a shower in January. Two weeks beforehand is cutting it pretty close, if you ask me...

adri823:

I don't know what to tell you about your situation. Since your cousin and sister are the only ones who have actually offered to throw your shower (sounds like MIL is hedging, maybe hoping someone else steps up?), and if you think that will make everything a little smoother with family relations (for cripes sake, your own mom and sister should get to be at your shower!) then by all means let them throw it. If your MIL then wants to get upset about it, let her throw a separate shower for you with her side of the family, and if you have the baby early before her late, late shower, well, as the saying goes: that will learn her.

this!!! enjoy it!!

My sister offered to throw me a shower... probably co-hosting with my mom.. I don't even know which are the plans of my MIL... but I don't mind... she would probably be joining us as a guest...

I would have your sis and cousin do it, help with it if you want/can but don't tell the guests. Then if MIL wants to do something she can in addition to this shower and it'll be convient for her and her family (b/c that's what matters right?) and you will have the shower will all your family and it'll be perfect!

My sisters are throwing my RI shower and my MILs and an aunt are throwing my CT shower.

i would let your cousin and sis do it.  in my book, it's whoever gives you a true commitment to do it first, gets to do it. 3 of my friends are co-hosting together (one doesn't know the other 2, but they all asked if they could do it so i put them in touch with each other). i guess you could do that too, if your mil wants to be involved, tell her to contact your sis and cousin and she can partake.  or maybe to avoid a shower too close, you could ask her if she'd rather host a post baby meet and greet.  sounds like she may be more comfortable with that since she's a bit superstitious. hope it works out for you.

I agree with PP - let your cousin and sis do it.  Clearly they want to do it for you. 

I on the other hand have not had a single person offer to throw me a shower .  When I was married 4 years ago, all of my aunts who live nearby got together and threw me a shower.  I am hoping the same thing happens for a baby shower - but who knows??  I am really hoping that someone hosts a shower for us.  Do I ask if no one says anything to me??  And how long do I wait???? 

My friends offered to throw me a shower, I'm waiting until they are ready to discuss it further before saying anything about it.  My mom is old fashioned and doesn't believe in showers before the baby is born (she is especially sticking to her guns on this one because of the few minor problems I have had).  I do know that my MIL is planning on throwing one for us, but I have no clue when or even if she will invite my mother.

My mom is throwing me my shower next Saturday and I have no idea who will be there. I know some people were invited because I made sure my mom knew to invite them but other than my sister and aunt I have no idea.

Unfortunately a shower is a gift and unless you are asked you cannot dictate the terms. They have every right to give you a shower whenever they want and to invite whoever they want. They should be polite and make sure that at least people you want to be there will be invited but that in the end it is their decision as a hostess.

I would tell your mom and sis that you cannot guarantee that they will be invited to any shower thrown by the ILs and that although you can suggest that they be invited they don't  have to take the hint. Maybe your mom and sister can throw you one for that side of the family.   

I would definitely have your cousin and sister throw your shower! 

1. they are ready, willing, and able and your MIL is obviously not that into it right now.

2. there is absolutely nothing wrong with a cousin and sister hosting the shower, in fact, to be very Miss Manners-traditional, I believe in the past it would have been considered rude for mothers/MILs to throw showers (this is not really an issue nowadays)

3. just mention to your MIL that your cousin is now giving you a party and you can have everyone at that one event.  if your MIL really wants to do a separate event for her friends/family, then let her. 

My mom is and it's going to be on March 13th and I'm due March 26th......my mom wants a big shower for me, but to me it doesn't really matter, I just want to have my family and friends there to celebrate the day with me!

My mom and her friend, a close family friend who hosted my wedding rehearsal dinner, are throwing the shower for me. I'm due May 2nd and they've set a date of April 3rd for the shower.

My aunt sent me an email about a week ago offering to throw me a shower.  It will be in March.  I think she jumped on it so early because DH's family is in CT (we're in NC) and I'd like for them to come.

I APOLOGIZE FOR THE CAPS ITSIT'S MY IPHONE IT WON'T DO NORMAL SIZED FONT...RIGHT NOW IMI'M NOT GETTING A SHOWER BECAUSE MY MOM SAID SHE HAS TO THROW A GRADUATION PARTY FOR MY BROTHER BECAUSE HE GRADUATES SYRACUSE LAW IN MAY SO SINE SHE THREW MY BRIDAL SHOWER AND WEDDING AND THEY DONTDON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR A WEDDING FOR HIM THEN I DONTDON'T GET ONE. HOPEFULLY THAT WILL CHANGE.

From what I've been able to gather, 4 of my friends + my mom are working on my shower.

 

Bashert628:

I APOLOGIZE FOR THE CAPS ITSIT'S MY IPHONE IT WON'T DO NORMAL SIZED FONT...RIGHT NOW IMI'M NOT GETTING A SHOWER BECAUSE MY MOM SAID SHE HAS TO THROW A GRADUATION PARTY FOR MY BROTHER BECAUSE HE GRADUATES SYRACUSE LAW IN MAY SO SINE SHE THREW MY BRIDAL SHOWER AND WEDDING AND THEY DONTDON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR A WEDDING FOR HIM THEN I DONTDON'T GET ONE. HOPEFULLY THAT WILL CHANGE.

Go to General -->  Keyboard  -->  disable capslock

See if that helps any?

My SIL, who is also my roomate and BFF, is throwing mine with the help of my MIL and a couple friends.

If your cousin and sis have offered, than I would let them go ahead and plan it.  Because they are younger (I'm presuming) than your MIL than they will be more gung ho planning the shower.

i'm pretty sure that my mother will be throwing my shower.  as far as i know, my MIL and SILs havent offered so it will all fall on my mom (i'm an only child).  if your cousin and sister want to throw you a shower, i would tell them to go ahead with it.  that way, you know it will be planned in advance and everyone will be invited.  i wouldnt be comfortable with waiting until 2 weeks before the due date either.

My Aunt and cousins are throwing me a shower in Jan sometime (I'm due March 7th.)  Honestly, there's been very little mention of any actual plans for it, but I trust my aunt when she says she do it.  You might be surprised how quickly your MIL will get things going, especially once it gets closer to the end of the year. 

If she wants to wait that late (for whatever reason) have you considered doing a post-baby shower?  I wouldn't do one two weeks ahead of time, because if you go into labor early - you'd have a fresh newborn that you won't want to expose to germs that early.  A post-baby shower (like between 1-2 months after) might solve both of your problems (she knows the baby is okay and you know the shower date won't be an issue.)

Make a list of everyone you want to invite, that way, if your MIL throws you a shower, make it a point to say "please invite these ppl as well as they are very close to me and would appreciate their presence at the event". This is YOUR shower, and DH  paternal side of the family should be invited- whether they get along or not. Also- . She is right- a lot can happen during a pregnancy, but you must do it at a time of your convinience, not hers.

 Should she reject it or give an excuse, I guess its open season to have either your Mother or sister throw one just for your family. Your MIL has no recourse and will understand the reason why a second pary was held.

  As for your own family throwing a shower, nothing is more comforting that being with people you have grown up with or people you have know all your life. Perhaps their shower will be very different than the one your DH's side of the family will throw. I would say yes. Twice the gifts and twice the fun and twice the advice the way i see it!,

 

" my family doesn't understand the tradition of showers (we are not American)"

 My room mate in college had a similar situation- her in laws (also originally from india) did not underdstand what a baby shower was or its real significance. She did some research with her DH and found the equivalent was called a "godh bharai", and the moment she uttered those words, it was like an "a-ha!" moment for her extended family, and they understood!.

 

My sister is throwing my shower, and my mom is paying.

Luv-a-Bug:

Bashert628:

I APOLOGIZE FOR THE CAPS ITSIT'S MY IPHONE IT WON'T DO NORMAL SIZED FONT...RIGHT NOW IMI'M NOT GETTING A SHOWER BECAUSE MY MOM SAID SHE HAS TO THROW A GRADUATION PARTY FOR MY BROTHER BECAUSE HE GRADUATES SYRACUSE LAW IN MAY SO SINE SHE THREW MY BRIDAL SHOWER AND WEDDING AND THEY DONTDON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR A WEDDING FOR HIM THEN I DONTDON'T GET ONE. HOPEFULLY THAT WILL CHANGE.

Go to General -->  Keyboard  -->  disable capslock

See if that helps any?

I tried this...it only happens when I try to post on the bump/nest/knot...nowhere else. Thanks for trying though lol. :)