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11-01-2012 at 2:38 PM
MBush4
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What to give at second baby shower?

A friend of mine is expecting her second at the end of the month. Another set of friends are throwing her a shower this weekend and I am honestly at a loss for what to get her. She had a gender neutral shower last April (2011) and I spent a decent amount of money on getting her good, gender neutral essentials.

I'm begrudgingly going to the shower because I feel guilted into (she sent me an invitation via Facebook... Indifferent) and while the invitation says "presents aren't necessary, but would be appreciated since this time she's having a boy."

In my defense, the only reason we're friends is because her husband and his family are very close friends with my family so we've been kind of "forced" into being friends... So what should I get? I was going to get a simple outfit once the baby was here, but.... For some reason I just feel forced into giving her something before I wanted to and I don't like that feeling. It makes me resent giving her anything at all...
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11-01-2012 at 3:23 PM
MySallyGir...
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Honestly I would probably have something going on that day or like you said get something simple and inexpensive like a little outfit and some baby wash or something.
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11-01-2012 at 3:26 PM
discobelle
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MySallyGirl:
Honestly I would probably have something going on that day or like you said get something simple and inexpensive like a little outfit and some baby wash or something.

This exactly.  I would probably skip it, but if you feel obligated, just get something small. 
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11-01-2012 at 3:27 PM
MBush4
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Thanks! Yeah, DH has told me I am under no obligation to go and that he'll help me create an alibi if necessary. I just felt bad because last night a bunch of us were at my parents' for a Halloween party and when she left and we (my mom, SIL and I) said see you later she said, "No! We'll see each other Saturday at the party!"

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11-01-2012 at 3:31 PM
aeh72
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If you feel obligated or guilted into go, I would get her a small gift (an outfit is good) and then not get her anything when the baby is born. Just send her a card then.
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11-01-2012 at 4:36 PM
1026pumpki...
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I agree that you shouldn't feel obligated to attend or bring a gift- just send a card when baby arrives.

If you end up deciding to go, I'd either get an inexpensive boy's outfit or a small basket with some bath or diaper stuff and maybe some boy wash cloths or towels. 
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11-01-2012 at 5:15 PM
EastCoastB...
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I'd just give a small outfit. I'd spend no more than 10, maybe 15, bucks.
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11-01-2012 at 6:06 PM
tcu_2003
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I probably wouldn't go, but if I did, I'd either give an outfit, or a small pack of diapers or some diaper wipes.
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11-01-2012 at 7:30 PM
JenniD2
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I agree with the PPs. If you feel obligated to go, then get the baby a small gift like a onesie. I would not spend more than $15 on a gift.
 
11-01-2012 at 7:51 PM
BallSox
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A dollar store book with a personal inscription in it.  I mean, those are so special, how could she want anything else?
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11-01-2012 at 9:11 PM
rhubarb123
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EastCoastBride:
I'd just give a small outfit. I'd spend no more than 10, maybe 15, bucks.

This.  You kind of missed your opportunity to back out when she said she'd see you all on Saturday.  Once the baby is born you could always give a small baby photo album.  I always give a gift when I visit the baby for the first time, too.
 
11-02-2012 at 10:56 AM
Liz4444
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I would like for everyone who says, but xyz is acceptable in my social circle, to please reread the OP. this is what your "social circle" is saying behind your back.

OP, I would get her whatever you were planning on giving her once the baby is born.
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11-02-2012 at 11:06 AM
Cranang
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Liz, that's just crazy talk.  THOSE people know their social really well.  They're SURE.  This girl obviously is very different...she's just not as aware of her social circle as some people are.
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11-02-2012 at 12:31 PM
PrimRoseMa...
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I would give a gift card and a little bath set. Shampoo, soap and washcloths are always a need no matter how many kids you've got.
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11-02-2012 at 12:59 PM
Liz4444
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THOSE people would NEVER be friends with anyone who would say something like that anyway.
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11-02-2012 at 6:50 PM
MCRM22011
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You honestly don't have to get her anything. You don't have to even go to the shower. If you truly feel bad to go empty handed, get her a onesie or sleeper for $8-$10 at Walmart/ Target/ Carter's, etc. 
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11-03-2012 at 11:01 PM
danatdana
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(I wouldn't go but...) She should have all the big things. All she needs is diapers and wipes.
 
11-05-2012 at 10:19 AM
rpalen29
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just get a cheap outfit from target or walmart or something. maybe check online to see if she has a registry, and get something small from that. 
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