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11-04-2012 at 6:20 PM
stephrodge...
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Breastfeeding...how difficult?

I am really wanting to breastfeed, but after reading so many things about it, I'm really worried that I'm not going to be able to. Is it really as hard as what I'm reading/seeing? It seems like a small portion of women can actually do it successfully....

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11-04-2012 at 6:36 PM
FrecklesIn...
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I'm a FTM so I can't really answer this question - but I had to chime in. I've been reading A LOT about this (books that were recommended to me or that I researched and thought would be helpful). From what I can tell, being afraid you can't do it is probably your worst enemy. When women struggle, they probably need a lactation consultant - it is probably about the latch. I've read so many success stories following women reading and doing research and then having a consultant. The other enemy is if you ARE struggling, to listen to those saying maybe you have a low milk supply - the only way you will end up with a low supply is by listening to this, weaning LO a bit because of your fears and thus lowering your production. Basically, it seems Mom's fears or hesitations are the biggest barrier in successful breastfeeding. Of course it is a challenge in the beginning, but from what I've read, sticking to it, getting help early, and remaining positive are the keys to success. 

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11-04-2012 at 6:39 PM
Angela814
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I don't think it's hard per say. It can be painful, especially in the beginning, and there's a lot of bad information out there. I'd take a breastfeeding class at your hospital if they offer one and bookmark kellymom.com for any questions you might have. Also, bring soothies gel pads with you to the hospital. They are amazing for sore cracked nipples. Really, you just need to put baby to the breast often and follow their cues, even if that means they want to feed every hour or less.


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11-04-2012 at 6:43 PM
Lariah14
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For some it's easy as pie, the baby "gets it" right away, great latch, no soreness, etc. For a few (really very few, or our species would have died out) it is impossible.  For most it's just a matter of an adjustment period. Most women *can* breastfeed successfully.

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11-04-2012 at 6:46 PM
watermelle...
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For us, it was emotionally more difficult than actually figuring it out. I was a wreck, hoping he was getting enough, making sure he was eating at the "right times", etc. He was fine...it took me a while to realize that. We BFed successfully for 9 months.

One of my mom friends wrote a great article about getting through the beginning parts of BFing. 

http://mamasaywhat.com/breastfeeding-in-the-beginning/


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11-04-2012 at 6:46 PM
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I feel like my biggest barrier to Breastfeeding my DD was lack of research. By the time I did the research, DD was hooked on the bottle, so I became a pumper. I feel much more confident for this pregnancy.
11-04-2012 at 6:47 PM
watermelle...
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stephrodgers07:
I am really wanting to breastfeed, but after reading so many things about it, I'm really worried that I'm not going to be able to. Is it really as hard as what I'm reading/seeing? It seems like a small portion of women can actually do it successfully....

...and I wouldn't say a small portion can do it successfully...but maybe a small portion can do it problem free? It's tough for a lot of women in the beginning.


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11-04-2012 at 6:53 PM
NativeFlor...
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Take a breastfeeding class. It will give you a good idea of what to expect. I breastfed DD2 for almost a year, and the worst parts were the first days, when latching made my nipples very sore, and anytime I got engorged from going too long without nursing or pumping. Aside from that, my experience was pretty good.


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11-04-2012 at 7:03 PM
epona3
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watermellens:

For us, it was emotionally more difficult than actually figuring it out. I was a wreck, hoping he was getting enough, making sure he was eating at the "right times", etc. He was fine...it took me a while to realize that. We BFed successfully for 9 months.

One of my mom friends wrote a great article about getting through the beginning parts of BFing. 

http://mamasaywhat.com/breastfeeding-in-the-beginning/

It was definitely harder emotionally than anything. DD latched on right away, and I never had any issues with cracked nipples or anything, but it definitely took about 2 weeks before it became less stressful and more routine. I remember being a wreck writing down how long she ate and when, and how many dirty/wet diapers she had. I was so worried she wasn't getting enough!

It took a little bit of experimenting before we figured out what worked for us. For example, at first I had her nurse on both sides during each session. But then I felt like I had to watch a clock to make sure each boob got the same amount of time. Eventually, I realized it was easier to nurse her on one side, and just alternate boobs each time I nursed her.

So, just remember it's different for everyone, but don't be afraid to talk to a lactation consultant or doctor if you need help!


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11-04-2012 at 7:03 PM
jinnymb
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The reason I did not succeed with DS1 was because I did not get help in time.  I did research and took a class etc.. but when it came down to it, I should have called in a LC right away. It's one of those things that is really hard to understand until you are actually doing it.

The nurses and LC in the hospital can be helpful, however it felt like each one told me something different.  I was also trying to figure out everything else to do with the baby it was a lot of info to take in.

My biggest suggestion is if you want to breastfeed successfully to find a LC before you have the baby and start a relationship.  Then after they are born do at least one visit in the first couple of days to make sure everything is going correctly and you have ONE person to ask questions and bounce ideas off of. 

I think it is totally worth the money in what you save, not using formula.  Some women get it right away and it works perfectly and then of course in that case you still have someone to ask questions but do not necessarily need to have a visit with. Then if you do have trouble you are already set up.

I was sooo determined to make it work, but I was so emotional and exhausted I couldn't grasp what to do if that makes any sense.  With DS2 I saw one the day after we got home from the hospital and she was amazing!! I nursed him until 14 months. That is just my experience hopefully it will just work for you, but I would have reinforcements just in case.




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11-04-2012 at 7:06 PM
Grace0609
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For DS1, yes it was horribly hard, he didn't gain weight and I ended up EPing b/c my supply tanked.  BUT.....

In retrospect, it wasn't my body's problem, it was my baby's problem.  When DS2 was born he opened up his mouth huge, latched on like a pro and I actually had oversupply issues with him.  That's when I realized that DS1, despite all of the lactation consultants help and reassurance that his latch looked good, just did not suck well.  He never emptied the breast despite "looking" good.  But, that was his problem, not mine.  I went on to nurse DS2 until he was 15 months old, and I am totally looking forward to trying again with #3 (and praying I have a good nurser again!).



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11-04-2012 at 7:10 PM
doremi29
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When DS was a year old, I polled my board at the time asking what was the hardest thing about bf'ing (just out of curiousity).  It was a resounding "the first two weeks in general" response and I remember feeling the same way.  I was so close to giving up, but suddenly at 2 weeks, he sorta woke up, became more efficient when nursing and suddenly we made it work.  I was very close to throwing in the towel but I'm so glad I didn't.

I will say that bf'ing never hurt for me.  I just found it frustrating early on because your boobs are so full, the baby won't latch, all you want to do is successfully feed your baby, and it really makes you feel like your failing.  But once you get it down, it's a really wonderful experience (or atleast it was for me).


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11-04-2012 at 7:17 PM
arobert123
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stephrodgers07:
I am really wanting to breastfeed, but after reading so many things about it, I'm really worried that I'm not going to be able to. Is it really as hard as what I'm reading/seeing? It seems like a small portion of women can actually do it successfully....

In regards to women who are successful, there are probably more then you realize.  I EP'ed twins for 6 months with relative ease, but it's something I rarely talk about.  I'm not exactly going to post on the boards about my success and when someone who is struggling has a question I'm not the best person to answer since I was never in that position.  Just don't let the bump boards be your litmus test.

I think the PP's had great advice - do your research now, stay calm those first few days/weeks, get rest, eat enough and by all means if you struggle get help as soon as possible.

Good Luck - you'll be great!


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11-04-2012 at 7:28 PM
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I know it's different for every woman, but it really wasn't too hard for me.  With #1 it took a few days to get the latch down and there were two weeks of really sore nipples (because I didn't realize that I wasn't putting enough of my nipple in his mouth), but after that it was a breeze.  And then with each kid it just has gotten easier.  Much easier IMO than cleaning out bottles and paying for formula!

I might be an exception though, because I've never had mastitis or clogged ducts.  My sister had a much more difficult time dealing with thrush, clogged ducts and having to avoid foods that gave her kids reflux.

To prevent things like thrush, I take a daily probiotic, drink raw milk, and avoid sugary foods.  I don't wear bras with underwires (that can contribute to clogged ducts).  I also change my nursing pads and bras religiously.  The smallest amount of leaking means I change them, because any wetness left on your breast can contribute to thrush.

My advice to you is to make sure you take a breastfeeding class before your baby arrives.  Mine was so helpful!  Also, make sure you speak with the lactation consultant as soon as possible after the birth.  Try to establish that nursing relationship ASAP - even see if you can delay all of the newborn tests and procedures until you've nursed your baby for the first time.  And please please please don't let them tell you that you need to give your baby formula because your baby is starving.  Even if you're not producing milk int hose first few days, your baby is getting colostrum and it is more than enough to fill their walnut-sized bellies.  Formula could cause all sorts of problems with your supply, nipple confusion, etc.  Just have baby spend as much time at the breast as possible.

It's such a wonderful thing!  Don't let people scare you.  I've spent 42 months out of the last five years nursing and 98% of the time has been wonderful!

11-04-2012 at 7:32 PM
doremi29
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Oh- and a lot of people recommend checking out kellymom.com for helpful info on bf'ing.

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11-04-2012 at 7:34 PM
erbear
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That's not true. It's just that you hear from the people who are struggling because they are looking for help and advice.

FWIW, I breastfed 2 babies for a year+ each with no issues. One bout of mastitis but antibiotics took care of it quickly. It helped to have breastfeeding friends and a mom and sister who had nursed. Good luck!


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11-04-2012 at 7:37 PM
Ooglybear
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I loved BF, but yes it was very difficult in the beginning. My personal struggles were:

-Flat nipples... I couldn't get DD to latch in the beginning. After several sessions trying with the LC, she gave me nipple shields, which saved the day for me. The shields can cause problems with supply though, so they're not recommended unless really necessary. I used the shields for about 8 weeks, at which point my nips were stretched out enough.

-Questioning whether she was getting enough... I think most BF mamas go through this. It's incredibly difficult to "know" for sure that your baby is getting enough to eat. Plus, in the first weeks baby goes through growth spurts like crazy, which results in frequent feeding and can make you think baby is "starving." Add in that babies cry a lot and there's a lot to fuel the paranoia. It's hard to not dwell on it. Support is so important.

-Occasional boredom... You're tied down for nursing sessions many many times a day. Of course its nice to snuggle your baby, but sometimes it feels like all you do is sit around and nurse. Also, if you're not comfortable nursing in public yet, it can keep your from getting out of the house. 

-Pain... It hurts at first. Your nips are not used to it and they get sore. It wasn't unbearable, but it was painful. Also, the letdown sensation was quite uncomfortable for me, like a sharp shooting pain.

-Pumping sucks... If you plan to go back to work, this is a big one. Pumping is not as effective as baby at breast, so it's hard to produce enough to send to daycare. You spend all your break time hooked up to a not-pleasant milking machine to only produce X number of ounces. It can be discouraging. Plus your coworkers and boss may or may not be understanding of your pumping needs.

I'm not saying that to discourage you, but I think it's important to understand that there are real struggles, especially emotionally. I think it is important to be educated beforehand (through a class at the hospital, through your own research, and/or through info from moms on TB). You will need support: people to encourage you to continue even when its hard and people who will not tell you to offer formula b/c "baby looks hungry still."

I nursed DD for almost 16 months. It was a wonderful experience overall and I'm excited to nurse this LO too. 


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11-04-2012 at 7:39 PM
mommajewel...
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With #1, it started off a doozie. I made the mistake of assuming it would "come naturally," so I didn't bother doing anything to educate myself on the process, do's & don'ts, etc. We had a very, very rough start but thanks to a great lactation consultant and a lot of patience on my part we were able to get the hang of it and it got much easier. With the rest of my kids it did just "come naturally" because I knew what I should & shouldn't do, knew how to get a proper latch, etc.

My best advice is to educate yourself while you're pregnant, do some reading, maybe take a breastfeeding class, understand and accept that it probably won't be easy from the get go until both you & baby get the hang od it and if you do run into problems, seek help from a GOOD lactation consultant.


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11-04-2012 at 8:00 PM
stephrodge...
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Great, realistic advice ladies...Thank you.

 

Where do you find a lactation consultant? I know there is a breastfeeding class at the hospital that I am planning to attend. Would that be where the future lactation consultants are or ??


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11-04-2012 at 8:02 PM
mrs.birdie
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Breastfeeding can be very difficult. It can also be very painful. I BF'd my DD for 20 months and it definitely got better. The first few weeks were the hardest. First, my milk was slow coming in and DD was so hungry. After that, I dealt with engorgement and cracked nipples. It hurt so much when DD would nurse. I gritted my teeth and got through it because I felt it was the right decision for us personally. After the first few weeks, it was easy for us. It didn't hurt, DD was healthy and happy.

My advice is to give it a try, but try not to feel guilty if it doesn't work out. In the end, all that matters is that your LO is getting the nourishment he or she needs.
11-04-2012 at 8:07 PM
keg
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Breastfeeding definitely has its challenges, but there are plenty of women who can do it successfully.  I think it's important to have a network of people supportive of BFing who can help you in those first few weeks where it can seem so overwhelming.  I wound up talking to multiple different LCs and I actually liked having multiple opinions because it provided me multiple solutions to try.  Also, certain LCs were pushing things that I wasn't comfortable doing (like taking reglan to increase supply).  I did have a lot of issues early on that were likely unique to twins (NICU time, some bad pump advice, DDs that didn't latch well and really "get" BFing until they were 3 weeks old, and supply problems).  However, there were some things that weren't a problem at all, like switching back and forth between breast and bottle and I had no pain. 

Another thing to remember if things are rough is that BFing doesn't have to be an all or nothing thing.  When I was pregnant, I wanted to exclusively breastfeed because you only really hear about only breastfeeding or only formula feeding.  Because of our situation, my girls were breastfed but supplemented with formula.  In our situation, that worked great.  I'm going to do my best to exclusively breastfeed this one, but I also realize that formula isn't completely evil and if it turns out a combo is what works best again, I'm okay with it. 


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11-04-2012 at 8:14 PM
MelissaRae...
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stephrodgers07:

Great, realistic advice ladies...Thank you.

 

Where do you find a lactation consultant? I know there is a breastfeeding class at the hospital that I am planning to attend. Would that be where the future lactation consultants are or ??

Google your local La Leche League or the class may be taught by an LC. I know at my hospital all the nurses have BF training and then there is a certified LC. If you have not gone on a hospital tour yet this would be a good question to ask. 



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11-04-2012 at 8:15 PM
jinnymb
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The hosptial will have a list that do home visits or you can meet with after you are discharged, ask friends, google ones in your area, try recs from the local Le Leche Leauge, speciality baby stores might have a list, also check with your future pedititrician for who they work with.

Good luck with your delivery and nursing!!




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11-04-2012 at 8:17 PM
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stephrodgers07:

Great, realistic advice ladies...Thank you.

 

Where do you find a lactation consultant? I know there is a breastfeeding class at the hospital that I am planning to attend. Would that be where the future lactation consultants are or ??

They usually work through the hospital and do rounds on the mother/baby unit.  Our hospital LCs actually taught the BFing class I took, so I was able to meet them then.  If yours don't, maybe you could call the hospital and try to set up a meeting with them to discuss any preparations they think you should make prior to the birth.  This would also let you get familiar with them before you give birth.

11-04-2012 at 8:19 PM
Ooglybear
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stephrodgers07:

Great, realistic advice ladies...Thank you.

 

Where do you find a lactation consultant? I know there is a breastfeeding class at the hospital that I am planning to attend. Would that be where the future lactation consultants are or ??

My hospital had two on staff. You can also get support by going to La Leche League meetings. 


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11-04-2012 at 8:22 PM
katie6/26/...
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I won't lie.  The first few weeks were not great.  I cried a lot due to pain and feeling like it would never get better.  I spent lots of time with the lactation consultant for the first 6 weeks.  By 8 weeks things were much better.  I was able to do it for 15 months, so I have no regrets.
 
11-04-2012 at 8:47 PM
snowflake9...
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It is a huge commitment and can be tough, but many women successfully bf.

 
11-04-2012 at 8:58 PM
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The percentage of women who truly can't breast feed is very slim, it's just VERY difficult the first month or two so a lot of women say they couldn't because baby would latch or its painful. I had breast implants put in about 5 years ago, and really thought I wouldn't be able to but with the help of a lactation consultant I was able to, and glad I did!

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11-04-2012 at 9:22 PM
thatonered...
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I dont want to discourage you with another "bad" story, but it was pretty bad.

I had many, many factors working against me. I had anatomical issues, my labor was crazy long and distressing for my baby, my milk wouldnt come out, and not to mention, I am EXTREMELY sensitive. My LC said it's probably from how fair my skin is. It's really, really rare that my bra comes off for any amount of time. So... I had a tough run.

Another thing. I asked my doc about pumping to stimulate labor. He said as long as I did it when LO was really active and didnt go crazy with it, I could. When I was having trouble, the nurses got really up in arms when they found out that I had been pumping and seriously were making it sound like I screwed the whole thing up. The LC defended me and told me that it was fine that I had tried to stimulate my labor that way. I still wonder if I had over-stimulated them or just thrown my hormones off. I never felt like my hormones were on board with what I needed them to be doing. Labor never came on its own, my milk was all off, and I had trouble bonding. I just think I had a crap shot at it. 

I now have an absolutely beautiful, chunky, healthy, bottle-fed baby 

(ETA My point in my long, personal story is that for me, I had alot of issues with it and it didnt work. It took a very long time to not feel like I failed or have horrendous guilt about it. Breastfeeding is best if thats what you can do. If not, then there are valid options) 


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11-04-2012 at 9:32 PM
daylights1
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Honestly, I think a lot of it depends on the individual.  Some women have a very easy time with it, some try everything and are unsuccessful.  I think if you go into with a positive attitude and do everything within your power to make it happen but don't beat yourself up if it doesn't work for you it will be ok.  Look to see if  the hospital you are delivering at offers lactation counselling.  They can be really helpful. 

 


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