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11-05-2012 at 11:41 AM
buttaflly2...
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Sex after baby question

So I'm a FTM and I heard you have to wait like 6 weeks after birth before you have sex again. Is this accurate? 

My other question is about your breasts leaking during sex after you have the baby, Does this happen and if so do you do anything about it? I just wonder because I see posts where the baby hasn't even come yet and their breasts leak. If this happens I don't think I'm going to feel all that confident having sex if milk is dripping all over the place lol.  
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11-05-2012 at 11:47 AM
g8trkim
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At your postpartum appointment, which is 6 weeks after birth, they doctor will let you know if it's okay to have sex. If you have a c-section, they may make you wait a little longer. I got the okay at 6 weeks but still waited until 8 because I just didn't feel ready yet. The first few times after baby are pretty uncomfortable. I never had an issue with leaking, and I had a really good supply, but everyone is different. I think the leaking thing may happen during sex because of the hormones that are released at the time.
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11-05-2012 at 11:49 AM
526SadieSa...
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Its a general rule of thumb to wait 6 weeks after a vaginal delivery - that's usually when you'd have a check up with your OBGYN to see if you've healed up (if you had stitches).  Healing after a C-sec delivery takes longer in general.

If you don't need stiches, I suppose you can have sex as soon as you're feeling up to it - but be aware that you can definitely get pregnant again right away, whether or not you are breastfeeding.  Two of my friends have gotten pregnant while breastfeeding.

Breast leaking can happen before and after delivery.  The only way it stops is for your milk supply to dry up. 

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11-05-2012 at 11:53 AM
blansaw
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If you do leak during sex you could always wear a sexy padded bra. It might make you more confident during the fun time.  Right now I keep my shirt on most of the time because I get worried about my belly not being sexy.  He tells me I'm beautiful, but I don't feel like it with this thing sticking out of me. LOL
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11-05-2012 at 12:00 PM
anneimal98
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Generally, yes, your doctor will tell you to wait 6 weeks beofre having sex after a normal vaginal delivery.  That doesn't mean you'll necessarily want to have sex at that point.  Last time, I had a 3rd degree tear and it was a few more weeks before I was even ready to try and months before things were fully back to normal.
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11-05-2012 at 12:05 PM
LoisLayn23
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Generally, you will get cleared to have sex after 6 weeks. It could be longer. My milk leaks all the time, sex or not. I let down every 3.5 hours, whether or not my baby is eating, if I'm sleeping, or if I'm mid thrust.
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11-05-2012 at 12:16 PM
SummerOH
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526SadieSadie:

Its a general rule of thumb to wait 6 weeks after a vaginal delivery - that's usually when you'd have a check up with your OBGYN to see if you've healed up (if you had stitches).  Healing after a C-sec delivery takes longer in general.

If you don't need stiches, I suppose you can have sex as soon as you're feeling up to it - but be aware that you can definitely get pregnant again right away, whether or not you are breastfeeding.  Two of my friends have gotten pregnant while breastfeeding.

Breast leaking can happen before and after delivery.  The only way it stops is for your milk supply to dry up. 

No, you can not have sex whenever you're feeling up to it.  Healing isn't just for stitches.  There's an open spot on your uterus where the placenta detaches that has to heal, too.  Having sex too early risks infection. 
 
Honestly, you probably won't feel like it anyway.  Exhaustion tends to do that to you.  But she is right - do NOT rely on BFing as birth control.  A friend assumed that because she has PCOS, had a hard time conceiving her daughter, and was BFing she was safe.  She got pregnant with her son when her daughter was 4 months old.  Oops!
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11-05-2012 at 12:34 PM
hocus
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1. In general doctors recommend 4-6 of nothing in the vagina (no sex, no tampons etc). This is to prevent infection since your placental leaves a wounder on your uterus. The exact amount of time will vary depending on what happens to you during birth.

2. Some women do leak. If you do you'll probably have sex with a bra+pads on for a time.

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11-05-2012 at 12:37 PM
hocus
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526SadieSadie:
 
No, you can not have sex whenever you're feeling up to it.  Healing isn't just for stitches.  There's an open spot on your uterus where the placenta detaches that has to heal, too.  Having sex too early risks infection. 
 
Honestly, you probably won't feel like it anyway.  Exhaustion tends to do that to you.  But she is right - do NOT rely on BFing as birth control.  A friend assumed that because she has PCOS, had a hard time conceiving her daughter, and was BFing she was safe.  She got pregnant with her son when her daughter was 4 months old.  Oops!

I'm always suprised by number of women who want to have sex around 2 weeks postpartum. I guess they just have easy babies.
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11-05-2012 at 1:50 PM
Mrs.Syntax
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I waited until I got cleared by the OB after DD's birth (about 7 weeks.) It wasn't only that I was exhausted and still feeling unsexy, it was also pretty uncomfortable because I was still sore down there. Lube is helpful. My doctor told me that I might need to use it as long as I was BFing because the hormones keep you a little dried up down there.

I also leaked quite a bit but only when I O'd. It kind of sucked but I learned to pump right before bedtime if I knew we were going to get busy - that drastically reduced the amount of milk that came out. 
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11-05-2012 at 2:02 PM
wawa84
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buttaflly227:

So I'm a FTM and I heard you have to wait like 6 weeks after birth before you have sex again. Is this accurate? 

My other question is about your breasts leaking during sex after you have the baby, Does this happen and if so do you do anything about it? I just wonder because I see posts where the baby hasn't even come yet and their breasts leak. If this happens I don't think I'm going to feel all that confident having sex if milk is dripping all over the place lol.  


I recently asked my mother about this.  She is a labor and delivery nurse so she is obviously quite knowledgeable in the area.  She said that you need to wait until the dr gives the green light because if you have sex before that and your body isn't properly healed yet your uterus can rupture.  That doesn't sound too pleasant to me.

My boobs leaked during sex after I had DS.  I just had to wear a bra always.  Eventually after a couple months of bfing and my body got the idea of how much milk to make the leaking got better.  I had an over supply, so leaking was always an issue for me. 
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11-05-2012 at 2:48 PM
LadyMadrid...
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My post partum appointment was at 4 weeks and my ob cleared me for sex at that time. I wasn't bleeding anymore and was raring to go! We dtd the night I was cleared and it wasn't painful like I worried it might be. I also never had lubrication issues though I've heard many women who breastfeed exclusively as I was doing do.

I only remember my beasts leaking once after sex...within the first few months.

HTH!
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11-05-2012 at 2:56 PM
Aloe0l
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I had a c-section wtih DD and was cleared at 6 weeks.

And my breasts leaked for the entire first year I nursed DD, sex or not.  But, I would often letdown if I O'd, so I would just wear a bra with nursing pads during the deed.  Plus, the extra support helped them not be so uncomfortable/jiggly!
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11-05-2012 at 3:13 PM
saturdayni...
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6 weeks is usually a safe bet for healing... before then I never felt up to it anyway. With a c-section, no prob, with an episiotomy (with the 1st) I was pretty sore during sex for a long time.The leaky breast thing never really happened during sex with me, so no help there.
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11-05-2012 at 4:30 PM
Mrs.DeliaM...
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You have to wait 6 weeks for either a vaginal or csection, because of the wound left behind by the placenta.  So, nothing enters the vagina during that time to prevent infection.

As for breasts during sex, my breasts leaked all the time and I pretty much wore a bra of some kind w/ breast pads 24/7 until I stopped nursing and was fully weaned.  I even wore something during sex, because honestly my breasts were huge, uncomfortable, and DH wasn't allowed anywhere near them.  I was not at all comfortable letting him share them with DS. 

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11-05-2012 at 5:09 PM
Mama-Bear
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I was cleared at 6w with my vaginal and c/s delivery.  We had sex around 5w both times, I had DH wear a condom so nothing stayed in there.  For a while, I recommend lots of lube, or at least have it handy if you need it.  It's been uncomfortable for me both times for several weeks after starting.

As far as leaky boobs, I would sometimes wear a sexy corset with nursing pads hidden, or pump/nurse right before so I'd be as empty as possible. 

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11-05-2012 at 5:58 PM
minervacul...
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Six weeks was way too soon for me. I had a 4th degree tear and even though the doctor said I could, there was no way. When we did about 7w pp it hurt like a mo-fo. Not externally where the tear was, but internally. The only way it didn't hurt was doggy style. We had to stick with that until I was about 3m pp. I didn't have an O until much much later though. As far as leaking, yep it happens. I did the bra thing if I hadn't just fed DS. If DS had just fed then I was usually fine, unless DH started messing with them too much.
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11-05-2012 at 7:57 PM
Todd&Laura
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hocus:

1. In general doctors recommend 4-6 of nothing in the vagina (no sex, no tampons etc). This is to prevent infection since your placental leaves a wounder on your uterus. The exact amount of time will vary depending on what happens to you during birth.

2. Some women do leak. If you do you'll probably have sex with a bra+pads on for a time.

This.  
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11-06-2012 at 2:20 AM
ilenegrace
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I just wanted to echo the pp's but also add that even though I got cleared at 6 weeks sex was incredibly uncomfortable until 6months postpartum. Also I always wore a sports bra or something during sex while I was nursing that helped with the leaking.
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11-06-2012 at 8:54 AM
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My midwife does not quote the 6 week hold.  She tells her patients to wait until after you are done bleeding (to prevent infection)- I've always just bleed for @10 days.  Obviously if you tore you'd want to wait for that to heal (but she rarely has people tear).  As a third time mom, we never waited past 4 weeks to have sex again (I think with our first it was more like 3 weeks).  I've never experienced leaking during sex I'm not sure how sex could produce a "let down" feeling. 
 
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