it is definitely a strain. for us it goes in cycles. we have finally figured out that it causes more strain when the burden is uneven. for instance, when i have to deal with meds/monitoring/hormones and he really doesn't have to do anything.
we finally sat down and i made a list of how he could do other things to ease the burden. he wanted to help, he just didn't know how. he didn't initially see that he could help more with laundry during times when my ovaries are the size of softballs and that it was a huge help!
in turn, i committed to doing everything I could to ease my own stress. i starting going to acu and having counseling with our pastor.
hope this helps, it is definitely tough!