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11-09-2012 at 2:21 PM
NewlyWeds1...
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NewlyWeds13 is not online. Last active: 04-24-2013, 4:19 PMSilver

Holding baby too much... long

I have heard 2 different things...

1) that you can't spoil or hold a baby too much until they are 3 months (or 6 months) depending on who you talk to/read

2) that after the 1st month, you should be putting your LO down for naps and significant amounts of time, so they don't get too attached to you and are not spoiled.

My DD is 8 weeks.  I have a 2.5 year old DS.   With my DS I held him a lot during first 3 months and he did have a hard time sleeping through the night until we did CIO at about 5.5 months and then he was fine (took 2 nights).  

I have a full time nanny so I can hold her the same way... but several people have told me that I should put her down more so she gets used to it and is not so spoiled. (which I kind of roll my eyes at) but I do wonder when the right time to transition to crib napping is...

She sleeps in the night in eihter a pack and play or a rock in play in our room.  Usually 1- 5 hour stretch, eats, then back down right away for a 3-4 hour stretch, then eat, then back down for 3 hours and then up.   So she does sleep ok at night by herself (not held)-- but naps... I pretty much hold her most of the day (except lots of tummy and mat time and playing on the floor) or when we go out and she is in car seat or infant carrier (depending on if by foot or car). 

Thoughts?

 
 
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11-09-2012 at 2:31 PM
LucyD1029
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I'm in the "you can't spoil a baby" camp, so I'd go ahead and hold her.  I hold DD all the time and she sleeps just fine (usually 7-8 hours overnight).  I did the same with DS. 
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11-09-2012 at 2:47 PM
lexmtown
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I agree completely with the 'you can't spoil a baby' rule.  When people tell me I'm spoiling my baby from holding him I tell them, I am a SAHM, my one job is raising this child, right now he's my boss and I do what he wants me to do.  My LO is only 2 months now, and I'm enjoying the time I have with him while he wants to be held.  We went to visit a friend last night, her baby is 6 months now and she was squirming all around not even wanting to be held.  Hold and cuddle that LO while you still can. :)
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11-09-2012 at 2:50 PM
buffyverrb...
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buffyverrban1 is not online. Last active: 05-14-2013, 9:43 PMNewbie

I am also in the "you can't spoil a baby under 1 year" camp. 

My midwives told me, the amount that you want to hold your baby, is how much you should hold your baby. If you are fine putting baby in a crib to nap (and baby is ok with it) then do it, but if you want to hold her, hold her.

That was a relief for me, because I wanted to hold DD all the time, but I felt like I shouldn't and I would be spoiling her. But once I got the go ahead, I held her a lot and my now 9 month old is not spoiled at all.  
 
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11-09-2012 at 3:24 PM
kjskjs
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LucyD1029:
I'm in the "you can't spoil a baby" camp, so I'd go ahead and hold her.  I hold DD all the time and she sleeps just fine (usually 7-8 hours overnight).  I did the same with DS. 

 

I agree. I hold my DD all the time and so does the nanny. She gets put down when she'll let us but for the most part she likes to be near someone. She sleeps at night with no problems. Only wakes up once a night to eat and then goes back to sleep.
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11-09-2012 at 4:53 PM
jennygirlm...
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While I don't think you can spoil a baby with love, DD didn't sleep through the night until 15 months, constantly wanted to be held and nursed to sleep. I was a zombie.

With this baby I plan to put her down to sleep when she is out but I have no qualms holding her when she is awake or needs me.
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11-09-2012 at 7:39 PM
gingerfami...
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I don't think you can spoil a baby.  But, I do think it's important to instill good sleep habits early... sleeping in the crib included (day and night). 
 
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11-09-2012 at 9:19 PM
nicnac817
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Hold that baby as much as you want...they are only babies for a short time.
 
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11-09-2012 at 11:48 PM
Afunky6
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DD sleeps about 11 hours at night and she gets held whenever she wants. I don't think you can spoil a baby and she hasn't shown any signs of that.
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11-10-2012 at 4:54 AM
Kimbus22
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I held my kid for every single nap from birth until he was 9 months old and wanted to be in the crib.  (I'm still sad sometimes. I miss the cuddles and the sleepy baby on my chest.)  He's happy to hang out with anyone who will play with him and he's not spoiled any more than any other toddler I've met.

I'm in the do what works camp.  If you're happy and your LO is happy and healthy, why rock the boat?

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