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11-15-2012 at 1:12 PM
ljanette85
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random question on thank you's

our baby shower was back in june and i made sure to send out thank you's wthin a week of the shower.  fast forward to now, a great aunt and uncle of my FI brought him a gift for baby in person (they did not make it to the shower). he thanked them in person and then thanked them again on my behalf when he saw them the next day. a few weeks later they called his mother to complain about not getting a thank you card??

did we do something wrong? it was so informal... they dropped a gift off randomly at him work and he thanked them 2x in person, I never even considered sending a card or letter.


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11-15-2012 at 1:15 PM
discobelle
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I think it's important to send out thank you notes for all gifts, whether they attended the shower or not.

But it's still pretty whiney of them to complain to his mom like that.


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11-15-2012 at 1:25 PM
Rose120
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discobelle:

I think it's important to send out thank you notes for all gifts, whether they attended the shower or not.

But it's still pretty whiney of them to complain to his mom like that.

I agree with this. I would have probably sent a note, but it's kind of ridiculous that he complained about not getting one. 

11-15-2012 at 1:43 PM
ggatlanta
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I try-try-try to send a note for every gift, even hand-delivered ones, but of course I can't swear I never forgot one. I don't know if it's wrong not to send one, but I know it's not wrong to send one, so I do it when I can.

In your case, I think it's certainly odd that your great aunt and uncle would complain about not getting a thank-you card. I don't object to a gift-giver asking whether a gift was received when there is some question about it - a present bought online but no thank-you note received, for example - but to simply complain about someone else's "bad manners" is, in fact, bad manners. Politeness is about setting others at their ease and making everyone feel comfortable and included - not about holding someone's feet to the fire over perceived "rule violations".

That said, I'm not perfect, and I recently composed a snotty response to the girl who wanted to know if 15 weeks was too early to start planning her own shower for baby #2, so what do I know! :-P


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11-15-2012 at 1:44 PM
mabenner1
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I would have sent a thank you, but after just a few weeks?  I can't believe they complained.


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11-15-2012 at 4:02 PM
oliversmom...
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discobelle:

I think it's important to send out thank you notes for all gifts, whether they attended the shower or not.

But it's still pretty whiney of them to complain to his mom like that.

This! 


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