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11-23-2012 at 10:53 AM
chlsbshp
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Baby shower for the next baby to be = tacky?

So I am torn on this one, DH wants to have a baby shower for our second (and probably last child), but I was told by my mother that you do not get a baby shower for your second child... I was wondering your thoughts on the subject.
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11-23-2012 at 11:13 AM
watermelle...
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Most people on this board will tell you that it's tacky to have a shower for your second baby. Showers are to welcome the new mom into motherhood.
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11-23-2012 at 11:21 AM
EastCoastB...
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Also, you can't have a shower if no one offers to throw you one. While some people say 2nd showers are fine, it's absolutely tacky to throw your own. 
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11-23-2012 at 11:40 AM
Allycat11
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EastCoastBride:
Also, you can't have a shower if no one offers to throw you one. While some people say 2nd showers are fine, it's absolutely tacky to throw your own. 

Exactly this.  A shower is only an option if someone offers to host one for you.  Traditionally showers are to welcome a new mother to motherhood but some circles do them for 2nd+ children as well.  Chances are if your mother said a shower would be inappropriate, most people in your family would feel the same.  

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11-23-2012 at 11:40 AM
mabenner1
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PPs nailed it. 1-You don't throw your own shower. 2-Showers are for the new mom-to-be, not for the baby.
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11-23-2012 at 12:31 PM
discobelle
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Showers are traditionally thrown in honor of the mother to be by her friends and/or family.

It's not really up to the husband whether to have one or not.

Has anyone offered to host? 
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11-23-2012 at 1:30 PM
Shea202
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Some people call them Sprinkles... Not a full on shower just a little one in case it's been a while since your last child or if it's the opposite sex of the last one you had.  Usually it is someone else throwing the party though.
 
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11-23-2012 at 3:07 PM
rhubarb123
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My thought is that your mother is right.  Obviously she KNOWS how your family dynamics works better than you do...they have showers for the first child only.
 
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11-23-2012 at 6:03 PM
Bliss+Berr...
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rhubarb123:
My thought is that your mother is right.nbsp; Obviously she KNOWS how your family dynamics works better than you do...they have showers for the first child only.


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11-23-2012 at 8:31 PM
oliversmom...
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EastCoastBride:
Also, you can't have a shower if no one offers to throw you one. While some people say 2nd showers are fine, it's absolutely tacky to throw your own. 

OMG yes! 
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11-24-2012 at 7:22 AM
Cranang
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Sounds like your DH wants othe people to foot the bill for your next baby.  Hmm  I can't imagine that he's sitting around going "Oh, every baby should be celebrated!  You need to have a shower!" 

Your mother is right.  And it doesn't sound like anyone has offered to throw you a shower, so who is your DH thinking will throw this shower?
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11-24-2012 at 2:59 PM
OSibyl
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My family throws "showers" for all the babies-to-be in our family. BUT only family is invited to 2nd, 3rd, etc and no one registers for gifts for these either. Mostly it is just the girls (moms, aunts, cousins) hanging out. We have a tradition of writing short letters to the baby for them to open when they graduate high school and a few other sillier things. My grandma always makes a blanket for the new baby so that is her gift and usually the rest of the family brings small gifts and many of these things have been hand-me-downs that are still in good shape.
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11-25-2012 at 8:39 AM
Eko14
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My family also throws showers for every baby born to this family. Generally we have the shower after the baby is born as well. Close friends and all the family is invited.
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11-26-2012 at 12:20 AM
Damask23
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chlsbshp:
So I am torn on this one, DH wants to have a baby shower for our second (and probably last child), but I was told by my mother that you do not get a baby shower for your second child... I was wondering your thoughts on the subject.

My SIL is about to have her third child. She didn't want a shower for this reason. They already have everything like furniture, clothes, toys, and supplies. However, we still wanted to do something for her. So we are throwing her a Pamper Party where everyone brings diapers instead.

ETA - Also, it is just family as well.

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11-29-2012 at 11:12 AM
AimnJus917
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Are baby showers for 2nd babies tacky? In a word, YES.  I also have to ask...

Wait, since when do DH's give a hoot about baby showers? Does he want to attend? 

What the heck do you even need? If you're having the opposite sex this time and have nothing gender-specific for him/her, that's your fault for not planning well the first time. Do you have any relatives that you could take hand-me-downs from?

I, for one, hate showers of all kinds and would be Mortified if someone threw me another shower or even a sprinkle as I honestly don't need a thing and wouldn't even know what to ask for.

Ugh this topic just rubs me completely the wrong way. I don't even think I could attend a 2nd shower UNLESS it was for someone that had their first baby 10 or more years prior.  That is the ONLY acceptable reason to have one.
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11-30-2012 at 3:15 PM
ordinary1
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Your mom is correct, second showers are tacky.  Why does your h want a shower so much? Also who does he think will be throwing it? Throwing your own shower is even tackier (and so is asking someone to throw you one).

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