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12-04-2012 at 11:47 AM
tilburyj
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Joined on 06-11-2010
North Central Indiana
12 Posts
213 Points
tilburyj is not online. Last active: 12-13-2012, 8:39 PMNewbie

Infertility Depression

Little back ground first...

My DH and I have been TTC for nearly two years.  I went off BC April 1 2011 and had a visit from AF. Then AF decided to take a 9 month vacation and finally returned Feb 2012.  Up until October 2012 AF came every month right on schedule. However,  After taking Ovulation test, after ovulation test, and never getting a positive test I started thinking something was wrong, but I wasn't ready to admit I needed help.  The beginning of October I experienced the ABSOLUTE worst cramps (I normally don't get cramps with AF).  I had lower back pain, and Bleeding like never before.  I finally went to the DR. and they confirmed that I had a early term Miscarriage.  I was only about 3 weeks along.  My heart sank.  Now it has been a little over two months since that and I get depressed every-time someone announces they are having a baby.  Currently I have 8 friends/Close friends that are due this summer/spring.  Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for them, but on the same hand I ask why me!  Why am I the one that can't get preggo.  Does anyone else out there struggling with infertility get depressed when they here new like this.
Enjoy what you have, because you never know when god will take it from you! 
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12-04-2012 at 1:52 PM
Shea202
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Joined on 10-17-2012
59 Posts
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Shea202 is not online. Last active: 02-14-2013, 2:36 PMNewbie

Depressed.... OH yeah.  I'm struggling with it as i write this.  I feel likeeveryone one else around is so freaking fertile but me.  the hubby and i have been trying for 6 years now.  We started the process of IUI (4 of them) last year and we just got done our first IVF cycle.  It was a BFN... i just wish we could be normal.

 Anyway good luck to you... we a re all in the same boat and i wish you all the best.  Anytime you need to talk or vent just let me know. Smile
 
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12-04-2012 at 5:13 PM
mkepanther
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Joined on 11-21-2012
227 Posts
3,987 Points
mkepanther is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 5:53 PMNewbie
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I have days when I feel depressed too. I think it's a natural thing to feel when you compare yourself to someone else.

I just don't understand how everyone but my H and I can get pregnant so easily. I get pissed whenever I think about the money we have spent on
our failed IUI cycles and IVF cycle with nothing to show for it.

The thing that pulls me through is my H. He has been my rock through every effing BFN.
TTC #1 since 2008. IUI #1: Clomid+trigger=BFN. IUIs #2-4: Femara+Follistim+trigger=BFNs.
IVF #1, Nov 2012: Bravelle+Menopur. 17R, 12M (all ICSIed), 6F. 5 day transfer of 2 embies=BFN. 2 embies frozen.
FET #1: started BCPs April 2013.

 
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12-04-2012 at 10:29 PM
dimples128
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Joined on 05-04-2008
Rogers, AR
1,248 Posts
8,322 Points
dimples128 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 4:26 PMBronze
So sorry to hear about your loss.  After my ectopic in the spring, I started seeing a counselor and taking lexapro. IF can definitely lead to depression. I would suggest talking with someone. Check out the resolve.org site for someone in your area who specializes in infertility. Mine was great and very helpful.  Good luck! 
TTC #1 - June '10 dx - LPD,2% Morph
Los Angeles, CA
IUI #1 BFN
IUI #2 Ectopic. 2 MTX dosages = left tube blocked.
IVF #1 11/17: Long Lupron 12/6: started stims. ER: 12/19 half ICSI ET: 12/24
12 retrieved, 6 fertilized, 2 transferred, 3 frozen
It worked! 1/2 Beta #1: 151 Beta #2: 354
One little bean EDD: 9/9/13
SAIF/PAIFW
BabyFruit Ticker 
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12-05-2012 at 6:08 AM
tilburyj
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Joined on 06-11-2010
North Central Indiana
12 Posts
213 Points
tilburyj is not online. Last active: 12-13-2012, 8:39 PMNewbie
Thanks everyone for your support.  I just feel like everyone else can get preggo, even the drug addicts and the prostitutes you read about in the paper, or see at your local homeless shelter. My DH and I have the love and means to care for a child, but just have not been blessed yet.  I pray every day it happens, and we can be blessed.  But until then, I guess it is just back to the two of us...and of course our pups.  Best of luck to all of you.
Enjoy what you have, because you never know when god will take it from you! 
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