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12-06-2012 at 7:41 AM
prttyinpin...
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prttyinpink809 is not online. Last active: 05-24-2013, 1:14 PMNewbie

Rant! How Ironic -_-

I'm 11 weeks pregnant. I'm a teacher at a preschool. Their philosophy is all about the importance of respecting children and the importance of doing what's best for a child's needs. 

But I announce I'm pregnant and I have felt like both of my doctor's appointments have been problems.

I recently got back from my delayed honeymoon and I was gone for 2 weeks-BUT I literally told my boss about this before she even HIRED ME. So she had the option of not hiring me if it was going to be an issue.

So when I made my first appointment after getting my health insurance she claimed that 

a) I originally told her I didn't even WANT health insurance (NOT TRUE)

and that she felt as though the whole center was revolving around my needs.

She still gave me the time off for my appointment, but she held a grudge for a while.

So I gave like...3 weeks notice for my next appointment, and I never even got the approval slip back, I had to ask her about it.

I told my co-teachers as soon as I scheduled it, and then I gave one of them a reminder about it the day before. Well, ONE of them (who is already kind of annoyed about me being pregnant for some reason) got annoyed because she said I didn't tell her about the appointment, and then she went and TOLD MY BOSS that she had NO idea that I had an appointment on that day. 

So I got yet another lecture from my boss, who told me that I need to be 'cautious' when asking for time off for appointments, and that I should just try to schedule them on the weekends or after work.

WELL, I'm the closer so I don't get off until 6:15, and my obgyn's office closes at 5 and isn't open on weekends. I REALLY like my obyn and I refuse to change practice because I work at a school FOR YOUNG CHILDREN who ironically is annoyed about my prenatal appointments. Honestly, I would almost rather be fired.

I haven't EVER acted entitled at my job,so it's not like people are annoyed because I'm DEMANDING anything.  In fact I've been super apologetic about my appointments (which I don't really think is fair but I'm just 'talking the talk' I guess). 

In a perfect world I would just work full-time from home (I have a PT online job that pays well, and I could definitely earn more than I do at my school if I went Full Time) , but then I would lose my health insurance.  

I just don't know what to do. I love the kids I work with, but I think it is ridiculous that I have to feel BAD or guilty about needing time off because I'm freaking PREGNANT!  I'm just..so annoyed. Maybe I'd be better off working a desk job or something, I don't freaking know.

 
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12-06-2012 at 7:45 AM
PrimRoseMa...
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Can you schedule them before work?
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12-06-2012 at 7:53 AM
prttyinpin...
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prttyinpink809 is not online. Last active: 05-24-2013, 1:14 PMNewbie
Their hours are the same as mine. And for ratio purposes we can't have more than 8 kids to 1 teacher morning time is the most crucial. Ugh
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12-06-2012 at 7:58 AM
KdgTeacher
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prttyinpink809:
Their hours are the same as mine. And for ratio purposes we can't have more than 8 kids to 1 teacher morning time is the most crucial. Ugh

What time do you start?  When I worked in daycare if you closed, you generally came in later in the day. 

 

Also, I don't think see what's ironic about your pregnancy and the job you have.  You're having a baby and you work with young kids...that's it.  Even with notice given you being gone does create a disruption (however small it may be).  THey must find coverage etc. 

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12-06-2012 at 8:12 AM
alwaysdanc...
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KdgTeacher:

prttyinpink809:
Their hours are the same as mine. And for ratio purposes we can't have more than 8 kids to 1 teacher morning time is the most crucial. Ugh

What time do you start?  When I worked in daycare if you closed, you generally came in later in the day. 

 

Also, I don't think see what's ironic about your pregnancy and the job you have.  You're having a baby and you work with young kids...that's it.  Even with notice given you being gone does create a disruption (however small it may be).  THey must find coverage etc. 

 

I think the ironic part is that she is working in a position that you would think would have a sense of understanding about children, babies, etc. and giving someone a hard time about being pregnant, which is a natural part of life is rediculous.  It is true however, that no matter what job you're in, your absense will most likely cause some chaos, however minor, in trying to make sure your shifts are covered and what-not.  But with that said, having a child is a natural part of life and one should not be made to feel like it's a burden on everyone else.  And again, especially in a place where there is an implied sensitivity to people with children, having children, etc., she should not be made to feel guilty.  Plus it seems like she's handling everything the way she should.
 
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12-06-2012 at 8:30 AM
Bliss+Berr...
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KdgTeacher:


Also, I don't think see what's ironic about your pregnancy and the job you have.  You're having a baby and you work with young kids...that's it.  Even with notice given you being gone does create a disruption (however small it may be).  THey must find coverage etc. 

This.   
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12-06-2012 at 8:54 AM
ZacksBride
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It sounds like you have not worked for this place very long considering your insurance just kicked in. That combined with the fact that you just had a 2 week vacation and now have regular doctors appointments makes me understand why your work would be annoyed with you. I would try to figure out a way to schedule appointments that do not interfere with work.
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12-06-2012 at 9:06 AM
dreadiemam...
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Are you using PTO time for your appointments, or are you just asking for the day/a few hours off? If whatever you are doing is going against their normal policy then I can see why your boss, co-workers would be annoyed. I wouldn't see it as a personal attack on you or your baby just the way things work there.

Unless you are working for a very small day care where you know the owner, it's going to be run like a corporate environment. This means that there is a way things are done, period. It doesn't matter if you are asking time off to go to pregnancy appointments or if you have a migraine and need to go home from work; time off is time off. I'm not saying this is right or wrong it's just the way it is.

A few suggestions would be to schedule your OBGYN appointments during or close to your lunch break. That way you are only asking for, say an extra half hour off work rather than a full hour or hour and a half. Ask your co-workers or boss when would be best for THEM for you to have your appointments. That way they are less likely to feel like they are working around your specific schedule. Talk to your HR/PBS (whatever) to see what his/her suggestions are. That way this isn't something just between you and the people you immediately work with... and it will show that you are making an effort to fit your needs in with the norm for these things.  
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12-06-2012 at 1:14 PM
prttyinpin...
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I'm using my break time for my appts, the kids nap for about 3 hrs so when i come back they are still napping .so when I'm gone, coverage isn't an issue.
I understand where they're coming from, but I feel they were harsh about how they said it.
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12-06-2012 at 1:15 PM
prttyinpin...
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Thanks :. I did That yesterday asked when the best time would be. I am using my break hour, and I am at most 10 minutes over.
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12-06-2012 at 1:34 PM
StarshineR
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"In fact I've been super apologetic about my appointments"

First of all, I wouldn't be. It only validates how they are treating you.

Second, if you are new at any job, it's generally a good idea not to ask for some time off until a significant period of time has passed. A new person has to do some degree of butt-kissing, to the boss and even to the co-workers, but there is a difference between butt-kissing and licking their boots. Look, it might seem unfair, but a new person needs to develop positive relationships/reputations before they can get away with what you are doing. 

Third, if you have given them 2-3 weeks notice, "coverage" shouldn't be an issue so I don't understand that at all.

Fourth, you told them ahead of time that you are pregnant, so I have no sympathy for their "plight" at all. Granted, legally, they were probably not allowed to take that into account before hiring you, or you could make a case that you were "discriminated" against and they'd get into a lot of trouble. Look into the laws - sometimes, they are legally required to accommodate you, and they can't just fire you for all this as you could claim that you were unfairly treated. This sort of scenario can lead to some resentment.  

Fifth, you entered this job on an incredibly bad foot. 
 
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12-06-2012 at 2:13 PM
mystererae
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What is your part-time from home job? Maybe there's a way to make it lucrative enough to cover the loss of health insurance.
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12-06-2012 at 2:42 PM
rockinwife
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prttyinpink809:
I'm using my break time for my appts, the kids nap for about 3 hrs so when i come back they are still napping .so when I'm gone, coverage isn't an issue. I understand where they're coming from, but I feel they were harsh about how they said it.

Even if the kids are sleeping, someone still needs to provide supervision so, yeah, coverage is still going to be an issue.  And even though you request a certain day off (or just some time) for an appointment, doesn't mean you shouldn't also go around to your co-workers it would effect to let them know.  This sounds like a more of a communication issue. 

 
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12-06-2012 at 2:46 PM
Shayliz
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mystererae:
What is your part-time from home job? Maybe there's a way to make it lucrative enough to cover the loss of health insurance.

I would never advise a pregnant woman to voluntarily give up health insurance..  
 
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12-07-2012 at 7:54 PM
MamaBear26
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rockinwife:

prttyinpink809:
I'm using my break time for my appts, the kids nap for about 3 hrs so when i come back they are still napping .so when I'm gone, coverage isn't an issue. I understand where they're coming from, but I feel they were harsh about how they said it.

Even if the kids are sleeping, someone still needs to provide supervision so, yeah, coverage is still going to be an issue.  And even though you request a certain day off (or just some time) for an appointment, doesn't mean you shouldn't also go around to your co-workers it would effect to let them know.  This sounds like a more of a communication issue. 

 Butting in from another board.

What the OP means about naptime coverage is that the ratio with sleeping children to one adult is higher than it is with awake children.  This is how lunches get covered because while all of the rooms are awake, all employees are typically needed or are sent home.  

 OP, your supervisor is screwing you over.  You need to do everything in your power to make sure that your appointments are on record as soon as you get them there.  Don't rely on the other co-workers in your room, put it in writing and deliver it by hand to the director or asst. director.  Check on it just a few days later.  Make sure it's on the schedule.  If you insist upon checking up on this, it will force them to do things the right way.  What they are doing by 'forgetting' your appointments you've notified them for will not be in line with company policy.

 FWIW, I struggled with the daycare I worked in while I was pregnant with DS.  It led to me quitting at 20 weeks because they were asking me to do unsafe things unnecessarily (like spend an hour on a ladder cleaning tape off the ceiling at 15 weeks and lift toddlers up onto a changing table despite my weight restriction.)  Just because they do right by other people and their children, doesn't guarantee that they will do right by you.  You are your and your child's best advocate.

 ETA: Oops, signed in under old name - I swear I've posted a lot more than once. :)



 
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12-07-2012 at 8:23 PM
Liz4444
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prttyinpink809:

I'm 11 weeks pregnant. I'm a teacher at a preschool. Their philosophy is all about the importance of respecting children and the importance of doing what's best for a child's needs. 

But I announce I'm pregnant and I have felt like both of my doctor's appointments have been problems.

I recently got back from my delayed honeymoon and I was gone for 2 weeks-BUT I literally told my boss about this before she even HIRED ME. So she had the option of not hiring me if it was going to be an issue.

So when I made my first appointment after getting my health insurance she claimed that 

a) I originally told her I didn't even WANT health insurance (NOT TRUE)

and that she felt as though the whole center was revolving around my needs.

She still gave me the time off for my appointment, but she held a grudge for a while.

So I gave like...3 weeks notice for my next appointment, and I never even got the approval slip back, I had to ask her about it.

I told my co-teachers as soon as I scheduled it, and then I gave one of them a reminder about it the day before. Well, ONE of them (who is already kind of annoyed about me being pregnant for some reason) got annoyed because she said I didn't tell her about the appointment, and then she went and TOLD MY BOSS that she had NO idea that I had an appointment on that day. 

So I got yet another lecture from my boss, who told me that I need to be 'cautious' when asking for time off for appointments, and that I should just try to schedule them on the weekends or after work.

WELL, I'm the closer so I don't get off until 6:15, and my obgyn's office closes at 5 and isn't open on weekends. I REALLY like my obyn and I refuse to change practice because I work at a school FOR YOUNG CHILDREN who ironically is annoyed about my prenatal appointments. Honestly, I would almost rather be fired.

I haven't EVER acted entitled at my job,so it's not like people are annoyed because I'm DEMANDING anything.  In fact I've been super apologetic about my appointments (which I don't really think is fair but I'm just 'talking the talk' I guess). 

In a perfect world I would just work full-time from home (I have a PT online job that pays well, and I could definitely earn more than I do at my school if I went Full Time) , but then I would lose my health insurance.  

I just don't know what to do. I love the kids I work with, but I think it is ridiculous that I have to feel BAD or guilty about needing time off because I'm freaking PREGNANT!  I'm just..so annoyed. Maybe I'd be better off working a desk job or something, I don't freaking know.

 

I'm assuming it's a private school, therefore, their philosophies would be for the children who are paying for their services.  They want to make sure that their employees are there to enforce those philosophies for their students not worry about their own children on their time and dime. 

Harsh, maybe, but they are paying you to do a job.  Considering you haven't been there for very long, it comes across that you are using the job simply for the health insurance and I'm guessing they feel taken advantage of.

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