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12-06-2012 at 10:14 AM
lindseyvic...
Not Ranked
Joined on 03-29-2007
Dallas/Addison, Texas
63 Points
lindseyvick is not online. Last active: 04-18-2013, 3:55 PMNewbie

New to the board

Hello new friends...my name is Lindsey and I am new here.

My husband and I have been together for 7 years and married for 3.5. We have been TTC for 18 months now and I am really struggling with the emotional aspect of it all. 

I went off of birth control in June 2011. Once I went off the pill I had about 6 months of irregular periods but in January 2012 I stopped having periods all together. My doctor told me to change my diet. I did...nothing changed. I however, changed Doctors. My new doctor thought that I might have PCOS. I did the internal ultra sound and she said everything looked normal. We started on progesterone to help me have a period...then we added Clomid. I have taken 2 months worth of Clomid have not had success. 

It is so depressing every month to take a pregnancy test and see it say "not pregnant". I swear it feels like the words "not pregnant" pop up before I even lay the stick down on the counter. Each month I get more and more depressed. I'm not sure where to go from here. I just thought this board might be a good place to start...many of you have been where I am at now. 

My husbands 30th birthday is on Christmas day and my 28th birthday is the day after his. Before we got married we talked about the children we wanted to have and we decided that we definitely wanted to have kids before he turned 30. With that milestone quickly approaching it just makes me feel like I have let him down somehow because I have been unable to get pregnant. 

Don't get me wrong, he has NEVER said that or made me feel that way. I just know how important having a family is to him. I'm just really sad. 

Sorry to be such a bummer, but thank you for listening to me.  


Sassy and Classy! >^..^< MeoW! 
12-06-2012 at 10:20 AM
melkel559
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Joined on 07-17-2008
17,161 Points
melkel559 is not online. Last active: 06-19-2013, 5:28 PMBronze

I am so sorry you find yourself here and for everything you are going through. The road to creating a family is supposed to be fun and exciting, not sad and disappointing and I am sure all of the ladies on this board can relate to what you are going through so welcome.

Are you seeing an RE? If not I would definitely recommend doing that. There are a load of tests we went through to ultimately reach our dx..has you hubby done a semen analysis yet? There are just so many things to consider, things I had no idea about and the RE would explore those things with you.

GL, we are all here to support you!


TTC since June 2011
DX: DH (30) severe MFI, severely low count & low motility
Me (32): all clear
Appt with Urologist 5/21/12: exam, ultrasound, bloodwork all normal.
Testicular Biopsy with TESE on 6/8/12. good sperm found! (left side only) froze sperm, failed thaw test :(
Orientation for IVF/ICSI on 6/13/12. Waiting for the green light following biopsy results...results show adequate sperm production both sides.
2nd SA 6/18/12: sample is "adequate for ICSI"
Plan: IVF/ICSI July 2012!
ER: 7/26/12. 15 eggs retrieved, all mature.
TESE/TESA/aspiration from epididymis, no motile sperm found :(
froze all eggs, the saga of praying for good sperm continues.
8/3/12: 2nd opinion from MFI uro on biopsy slides. Suspects "partial late maturation arrest."
Plan: more SAs, third biopsy/TESE with frozen back-up either from DH or DS.
SA 8/17/12: Zero sperm
SA 8/23/12: Zero sperm
9/26/12: SPERM FOUND! 15 eggs thawed, 12 survived and were ICSI'd, only 3 fertilized normally. Refrozen as embies and will thaw in Nov. Please survive and grow!
All 3 survived the thaw on 11/15/12!
FET 11/17/12: transferred 2, one 4B, one 4C. Beta 11/30:BFFN
moving on to DS
DIUI#1 2/18/13,50mg Clomid cd 3-7, Ovidrel trigger, Beta 3/4/13: BFN.
DIUI#2 3/19/13, 50 mg Clomid cd 3-7, Ovidrel trigger, Beta #1 (14dpiui) 4/2/13: BFP!!!! 150. Beta #2 4/4/13: 420 Beta #3 4/8/13: 2691. Beta #4 4/15/13: 15,086
1st u/s 4/8/13 shows one gestational sac
2nd u/s 4/15/13 shows yolk sac, fetal pole and early heartbeat
3rd u/s 4/25/13: measuring right on track. Heart rate 148 bpm
PAIF & SAIF always welcome
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
 BabyFruit Ticker 
12-06-2012 at 10:25 AM
LuvstheMag...
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Joined on 04-25-2012
1,904 Points
LuvstheMagicWand is not online. Last active: 06-05-2013, 5:34 PMNewbie
Welcome and good luck with everything!!

Too Positive to be doubtful, Too Optimistic to be fearful, and Too Determined to be defeated.  
12-06-2012 at 10:30 AM
megs3084
Not Ranked
Joined on 12-26-2008
Chicago
28,912 Points
megs3084 is online. Last active: 06-20-2013, 5:24 AMSilver

Hello & welcome.  I'm sorry you have to be here but I think you'll find a great deal of support.  I can completely relate to what you said about feeling like you're letting dh down.  The thing to remember is that DH married you completely, not just your uterus & ovaries.  The IF road isn't easy or for the faint of heart, but ultimately I feel that it has strengthened my marriage.  You guys are partners in this, just as you'll be partners in raising your family, regardless of how you create one. Perhaps counseling (either you alone or as a couple) would be beneficial to you.

 

I agree with PP.  Are you seeing an RE or an OBGYN?  I highly recommend seeing an RE if you aren't already.  There is a lot of testing out there that is beyond that which many OBGYNs do.  A SA is another great idea to make sure that DH is okay.  I'm not sure how involved your clomid cycle is, but please do not take clomid without ultrasound monitoring and bloodwork.  An HSG is another test you should have done prior to that to see if your tubes may be blocked.  All the clomid in the world wont get an egg through blocked tubes.  

 I hope your stay with us is short and sweet, but in the meantime, take a deep breath & remember we are here for you.  



"Everything will be alright in the end. So if it's not alright, it is not yet the end."
"She wasn't bitter. She was sad, though. But it was a hopeful kind of sad. The kind of sad that just takes time." The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Me:29 DH:29 TTC since 1/11 Dx: unexplained IF/early DOR/immune issues
Feb'12- Clomid/TI with CD3 &21 labs(normal)& SA-count 6mil/ml,morph/motil OK-BFN
April'12 Ultrasounds,HSG -clear, slight acurate uterus
5/14 IUI #1-50 mg clomid-post wash total motile count 19.3 prometrium 2dpiui= BFN
6/11-IUI #2-100 mg clomid & prometrium post wash count total motile 17.5 = BFN
7/6 IUI#3 with 100 mg clomid, estridiol, prometrium. post wash total motile count 23.3 = BFN
8/30IVF#1 BCPs, Follistim, Menopur,Ganerelix,Novarel.
ER 9/11-8R, 7M, 5F.
ET 9/14 2 embies transferred. 1 10cell Grade 4, 1 8cell Grade 4. No frosties. BFN
IVF#2 BCPs, Follistim, Menopur, Ganerelix, Novarel, Baby Aspirin
ER 12/5-16R, 12M, 8F!
ET 12/10 5dt! 1 fully expanded blast & 1 early blast. No frosties. BFN
2/13- Saline sono revealed a polyp. All additional labwork coming back normal. Genetic screen revealed DH has MTHFR deficiency & I am a carrier for it.
3/13 hysteroscopy & polypectomy
3/27 Began working with Reproductive Immunologist Dr. Kwak-Kim. Found High NK cells, High DHEAs, slight hypothyroidism, tendency toward blood clots (High PAI-1)Began synthroid & metformin 4/19.
Cycling in July

Here Comes the Sun Blog
PAIF/SAIF welcome! 
12-06-2012 at 10:31 AM
rrdiva1
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Joined on 08-30-2011
18,873 Points
rrdiva1 is not online. Last active: 06-19-2013, 10:00 PMSilver
Welcome and best of luck to you to get some answers. The PP actually asked the questions I was thinking, hopefuly they can get you on a good plan.

Married BF 6/29/2002/ TTC Since Aug 2011/ ME:34 dx DOR/DH:41 DX Severe MFI/oats IVF w/ICSI OCT 2012 Stims started 10/8/ER 10/19/12/ET 10/24/Beta#1 11/2=BFN (beta was 1.2) IVF 2.0-Baseline 11/7/12 beta 0/All Clear Stim start 11/7/12//ER 11/19 11M//10F ET 2 embies 11/24//Beta#1 28 Beta #2 23 Beta#3 29 stop meds Beta#4 37/C/P 5W5D EDD:8/12/13/Ivf#3 1/13 had to freeze 3 poor quality embies Fet 2/13=bfn 3/13-switched Re New protocol/lupron/bcp in July 13 5th final/everyone welcome My Chart//> Image and video hosting by TinyPic
 
12-06-2012 at 10:46 AM
lindseyvic...
Not Ranked
Joined on 03-29-2007
Dallas/Addison, Texas
63 Points
lindseyvick is not online. Last active: 04-18-2013, 3:55 PMNewbie
Thank you all for the warm welcome. I don't even know what RE means? Is that some sort of specialist? 

Sassy and Classy! >^..^< MeoW! 
12-06-2012 at 10:48 AM
megs3084
Not Ranked
Joined on 12-26-2008
Chicago
28,912 Points
megs3084 is online. Last active: 06-20-2013, 5:24 AMSilver
An RE is a reproductive endocrinologist.  They specialize in infertility.


"Everything will be alright in the end. So if it's not alright, it is not yet the end."
"She wasn't bitter. She was sad, though. But it was a hopeful kind of sad. The kind of sad that just takes time." The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Me:29 DH:29 TTC since 1/11 Dx: unexplained IF/early DOR/immune issues
Feb'12- Clomid/TI with CD3 &21 labs(normal)& SA-count 6mil/ml,morph/motil OK-BFN
April'12 Ultrasounds,HSG -clear, slight acurate uterus
5/14 IUI #1-50 mg clomid-post wash total motile count 19.3 prometrium 2dpiui= BFN
6/11-IUI #2-100 mg clomid & prometrium post wash count total motile 17.5 = BFN
7/6 IUI#3 with 100 mg clomid, estridiol, prometrium. post wash total motile count 23.3 = BFN
8/30IVF#1 BCPs, Follistim, Menopur,Ganerelix,Novarel.
ER 9/11-8R, 7M, 5F.
ET 9/14 2 embies transferred. 1 10cell Grade 4, 1 8cell Grade 4. No frosties. BFN
IVF#2 BCPs, Follistim, Menopur, Ganerelix, Novarel, Baby Aspirin
ER 12/5-16R, 12M, 8F!
ET 12/10 5dt! 1 fully expanded blast & 1 early blast. No frosties. BFN
2/13- Saline sono revealed a polyp. All additional labwork coming back normal. Genetic screen revealed DH has MTHFR deficiency & I am a carrier for it.
3/13 hysteroscopy & polypectomy
3/27 Began working with Reproductive Immunologist Dr. Kwak-Kim. Found High NK cells, High DHEAs, slight hypothyroidism, tendency toward blood clots (High PAI-1)Began synthroid & metformin 4/19.
Cycling in July

Here Comes the Sun Blog
PAIF/SAIF welcome! 
12-06-2012 at 3:42 PM
lisa41982
Not Ranked
Joined on 10-29-2007
Columbus, OH
1,941 Points
lisa41982 is not online. Last active: 04-02-2013, 6:20 PMNewbie

Here is a listing of specialists in TX...hope it helps! 

http://www.resolve.org/resources/professional-services/professional-services-list.html?professional_services=physicians&page=6#TX



Dx PCOS 2006 - on Metformin
Dx Hypothyroid 2009 - on Synthroid
TTC since 12/2009
DH - Low Sperm Count

IVF with ICSI Cycle #1 - October/November- 10/11 Begin Lupron, 10/20 Begin 300iu Gonal-F, Trigger 10/31, ER 11/2, 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 6 fertilized, ET 11/5 - 2 Grade 1 8 cells, 2 frozen blasts (5BA, 3BB), Beta #1 @ 8dp3dt: 7, Beta #2 @ 11dp3dt: 2 :(

IVF with ICSI Cycle #2 - January - 12/30 Begin Lupron, 1/8 Begin 300iu Gonal-F, ER 1/20, 13 retrieved, 11 mature, 6 fertilized, ET 1/25 - 2 blasts (grades 4BA, 1)

Everyone Welcome

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12-06-2012 at 3:55 PM
Juicy71
Not Ranked
Joined on 11-18-2011
23,537 Points
Juicy71 is online. Last active: 06-20-2013, 5:32 AMSilver

Also, if you are on Clomid, are you being monitored regularly?  Your doctor should be performing ultrasounds at least once prior to you starting the Clomid and then once around CD10-12 to see how you are responding to it.  There are some dangers associated with taking Clomid that can be caught if you're being monitored (you may be producing too many eggs which could lead to a Kate+8 situation if you're not aware, it can thin out your endometrial lining so much as to make if very difficult to conceive, etc...).  Plus, you just want to know if it even works for you.  Lastly, Clomid has a lifetime limit of 6 cycles, so you don't want to take it more than that.

Good luck to you and I hope you find some answers and don't have to be with us long!!


Me: 41 DH: 37 - AMA, DOR
BFP 2.12.2012, c/p 2.17.2012
IUIs 1-3 = BFFN :(
IVF #1 - Sept 2012 = BFFN :(
IVF #2 - Dec 2012 = BFP!! EDD 9/4/2013
Beta #1 = 107, Beta #2 = 4,650!! U/S 1/15/2013
Everyone welcome!
Team Pink!!
 BabyFruit Ticker Anniversary

 
12-06-2012 at 4:01 PM
Citygirl10...
Not Ranked
Joined on 02-16-2010
Philadelphia, PA
7,345 Points
Citygirl1015 is not online. Last active: 06-19-2013, 7:04 PMBronze

megs3084:
An RE is a reproductive endocrinologist.  They specialize in infertility.

Ditto this, but I also wanted to add that if you're really serious about pursuing infertility treatments an RE is the one to see. Your OB (or whoever was prescribing your Clomid) probably isn't an expert in getting you pregnant, and an RE is more knowledgable in infertily dx and treatment.

I know how you feel about reaching certain milestones and still not being pregnant, it's definitely depressing. Hopefully a treatment path will help you feel more hopeful and positive!

Wishing you the best of luck. Welcome to the board!


TTC #1 since Oct 2009, Dx: Unexplained Infertility
HSG: Right tube all clear, left tube inconclusive
3 failed Clomid Cylces
4/5 lap revealed blocked left tube, but right tube is open
April/May- 50 mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI #1= CANCELLED left ovary ovulating
June 1- 100 mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI #1 = BFN
June 28- 100 mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI #2 =BFP!
7/12 Beta #1= 14 Beta #2= >5 Chemical Pregnancy :(
July-Nov long break to recover emotionally and financially
Nov 24- 100 mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI #3= BFN
Jan 22- Gonal-F + Ovidrel + IUI# 4 = CANCELLED no response on right
IVF #1- Start stims 4/7, ER 4/20, 21R, 14F, 6 frosties, ET 4/25, 2 embryos transferred= BFN :(
FET #1- June 2012, Lurpon starts 5/27- CANCELLED
FET #1 take 2- August 2012, delayed until Sept-CANCELLED
FET #1 take 3- ET 10/11, 2 embryos transferred,= BFFN
FET #2- Transfer 12/4--Cancelled, no embies survived thaw :(
Next steps-- IVF #2 with new RE in March
HOLY SURPRISE BFP 2/15/13!!!! Beta 1- 286, Beta 2- 782, U/S shows baby in uterus and healthy heartbeat


 BabyFruit Ticker
 
12-07-2012 at 11:12 AM
lindseyvic...
Not Ranked
Joined on 03-29-2007
Dallas/Addison, Texas
63 Points
lindseyvick is not online. Last active: 04-18-2013, 3:55 PMNewbie
I had an ultrasound before I started taking Clomid. My doctor said after 3 cycles she wants me to come back in for more testing. I was just having such a rough day yesterday and getting yet another negative pregnancy test. But I am really enjoying reading other peoples stories. Thank you all for your support!

Sassy and Classy! >^..^< MeoW! 
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