Are you sleeping as much as you can? Even napping with her when she sleeps?
I wish I had completely focused on my DS and myself when he was first born. I was so worried about running the house (cleaning, laundry). It was hard for me to accept nothing else really matters but bonding and learning how to be a parent- not what anyone thinks about the state of my house.
If it helps- no one knows what they're doing with their first :) hang in there!!