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12-11-2012 at 7:26 PM
kellyrn995...
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Joined on 03-28-2010
Westminster, Maryland
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kellyrn9956 is not online. Last active: 05-21-2013, 8:47 PMGold

Finally bonding!

I don't know if it's because I am PAIF and PAL or just normal response, but for the first several months, I was not very attached to the baby. I thought it would change after the A/S, but it didn't really. I am finally now starting to feel a real attachment, which started when I was seeking out day care options. Something about making that big decision for him made me realize that this is real and that my CHILD is in my belly! Or maybe it's the constant movement I feel now.

Anyone just now starting to feel some bonding, or am I way late to this party?


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After 4 years, Clomid, Follistim, 4 IUI's, and a loss, we finally brought our son home. We love you, our break cycle miracle!!
 
12-11-2012 at 7:56 PM
Charlotte0...
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Joined on 07-09-2012
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Charlotte02 is not online. Last active: 03-18-2013, 1:37 PMNewbie
I felt so connected with my first. I haven't felt that yet with this one, some days I even forget I'm pregnant until he pops me in an organ. I don't know what it is this time. I looked at the ultrasound pictures a few times and put them away. My first, I obsessed over them. Read everyday on what was happening to "baby" the days went by so slow. This one time is zooming and I'm like it can not be 11 weeks left. I'm not ready! (haven't moved my son to his new room or sorted clothes or painted or or or) I think it will only be real when I get close or deliver. I keep trying to feel in touch with this baby but I think my life is too busy.

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12-11-2012 at 9:01 PM
reason00
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reason00 is not online. Last active: 04-08-2013, 7:13 PMBronze
You think you know love when you're pregnant, and then you think you know love when you give birth, but spend a year with your child and see how much different your love is. If they need your eyeball you will dig it out with your bare fingers.

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12-12-2012 at 8:20 AM
CarionHear...
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Joined on 09-28-2012
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CarionHeart is not online. Last active: 04-27-2013, 6:50 PMNewbie
I'm PAIF as well, and I can tell you the late bonding is completely normal. Mine fortunately did kick in after my a/s because little Joey was absolutely perfect and VERY healthy. Not to mention he was starting to move fairly regularly, so my brain couldn't deny anymore that he was there. With IF, it's hard to connect for a while because of the fears that something will happen to your LO. Even if you don't do it consciously, your mind will set up the defense mechanism for you because it would make things "easier to handle" were something to happen. For anyone with IF, you bond when your mind finally lets you accept that it's really happening and that the LO you're carrying will more than likely be your take-home baby. It's that moment when you can finally really enjoy your pregnancy and not be afraid to plan for the baby's arrival anymore. Very happy for you that your bonding has finally set in! It's a wonderful and liberating feeling after the IF struggles. ((hugs))

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12-12-2012 at 1:01 PM
beckyschel...
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beckyschell is not online. Last active: 05-21-2013, 9:29 PMBronze
I still feel like it's not quite real yet, I have heard the heartbeat lots, seen it, and felt it, but for some reason it does't seem real that I am actually going to be a mom for real! Hopefully soon I will relize it's real. I have waited so long to have a baby that it doesn't seem like its actually happening yet.

 
12-13-2012 at 10:19 PM
ArizonaJes...
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Joined on 09-18-2012
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ArizonaJessika is not online. Last active: 05-10-2013, 9:44 PMNewbie
I'm a FTM, almost 19 weeks and still don't feel like it's "real" - even with the ultrasound pics, and hearing the heartbeat. We go in Wed. the 19th to find out the sex, so maybe it will change then (plus, I'm not feeling any movement yet which is totally normal!) I'm wondering when I will actually feel it's real, and start to bond, too. I love the little alien in my tummy, but which event will actually TRIGGER a change in my mind/heart, who knows! lol

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