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12-18-2012 at 7:55 AM
Nita14701
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Nita14701 is not online. Last active: 05-17-2013, 2:29 PMNewbie

family doesn't get it....holiday related rant

I"m so frustrated right now. Will try to keep f' bombs from escaping from my fingers as I type. Basically family doesn't "get it" about us choosing to stay home with LO for the holidays this year. I thought we made this quite clear before LO was discharged from the hospital. But apparently not. I can deal with the guilt treatment from my mom about not taking the 7 hour car ride with LO to visit her for XMAS (I've had years of practice dealing with her).  But right now what is frustrating me is DH's family. Expecially since the most obnoxious person at this point is a dr and a mother who can't help herself from continuing to ask us if we haven't changed our minds about attending the family gathering that she is hosting this year. I am so angry right now!

Really does a dr not understand the concept of "weakened immune system" and RSV. Or maybe it was the fact that she did not spend 65 days sitting next to her child in the NICU. It's not a place that I want to go back to. I want LO to have lots of happy holidays with her family, which is why I need to keep her healthy this holiday season.

AHHHHH!!!!!!!
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12-18-2012 at 8:04 AM
M&MHaveMyH...
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M&MHaveMyHeart is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 8:48 PMSilver

I know exactly how you feel & were in a similar situation last year. We also live about 7 hours away from our families. They tried to "understand" but yet would constantly say "are you sure" & "he's healthy now"/"we're not sick." 

I stuck to my guns. They weren't too happy about it but I honestly didn't & don't care still. Besides, I wanted to be home with our LO for his first Christmas. Not on the road. Hang in there.
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12-18-2012 at 8:07 AM
BostonKiss...
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Ugh.  We still go through that crap with my H's side, and his mom's a pediatric RN and his sister's a farking doctor!  It's beyond annoying.  Just stick to your guns, and if she keeps hounding you, you can always stop answering her calls for a bit and see if she gets the hint to lay off.  I'm sorry that you're dealing with that crap.
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12-18-2012 at 9:43 AM
jennbent
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Before we left the NICU, our primary nurse told me to tell family, "if he gets sick, he could die."  It's not a joke or something to be taken lightly.  Just be blunt.  I'm sorry you're dealing with that.
 
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12-18-2012 at 9:47 AM
meganole25
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Since we're still dealing with insurance for DS's Synagis shot our plans have changed. I was really quite shocked when we called all of our family and broke the news that we would most likely not coming. I really didn't think anyone would understand, especially DH's family.

We sent them all a ton of links with info and I really think that made them get it. After reading everything the all agreed that we were making the best decision.  
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12-18-2012 at 9:48 AM
EAMommy
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jennbent:
Before we left the NICU, our primary nurse told me to tell family, "if he gets sick, he could die."  It's not a joke or something to be taken lightly.  Just be blunt.  I'm sorry you're dealing with that.

yep. this is what i've had to say to a few people who don't get it... sorry you're dealing with this.

Finally pregnant through the miracle of embryo adoption after 3 1/2 years TTC. One angel in heaven: 2/23/2010. Adopted 6 embryos in September 2011. FET with 2 perfect embryos on 4/26/2012. Beta #1 (12dp5dt): 315 Beta #2 (14dp5dt): 714 Beta #3 (16dp5dt): 1909 U/S 5w4d: One perfect little bean. Ecstatic to be pregnant; but sad that one of our embies joined his/her sibling in heaven. U/S 6w5d: HR was 123 bpm; absolutely perfect!  
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12-18-2012 at 12:26 PM
CurlingRoc...
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I'm sorry you are dealing with this!  My father was an RN until the early '90s when he changed careers.  He gave us a harder time than just about anybody about keeping DS on lockdown.  I think sometimes the medical professionals detach themselves too much from the situation and forget that we are not statistics, we are people.  GL!
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12-19-2012 at 10:57 PM
Cristine19...
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Cristine1982 is not online. Last active: 12-19-2012, 11:03 PMNewbie
I know exactly how you feel. Everyone keeps asking us the same thing. We keep telling people that we can't go anywhere until after flu season, but because they have never dealt with a preemie they don't understand. I was in the NICU for 2 months with our daughter and the nurses and doctors told us flat out unless you want to return to the hospital keep the baby home and away from others until after flu season.
 
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