He isn't going to do it the same as you. You really need to let go of thinking it should/has to be your way or that only your way is the right way. You want him to be a good dad and to step up when he should so you need to back down and realize that his way may not be as efficient or whatever as your way but he's the one doing it NOT you.
ETA: Her eating, unless she is truly close to being in big trouble over weight loss or something, just isn't justification so don't use that. At these ages the babies are changing up every several days to week/s. They are extremely adaptable.