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12-22-2012 at 5:13 PM
JessandKev...
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Joined on 09-20-2009
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JessandKevSanDiego is not online. Last active: 04-08-2013, 2:33 PMNewbie

Depressed, Pressure and Stress at 29 weeks.

I am 29 weeks, and have complete placenta previa.  Yay, right?  I am so let down that I have to have a c-section, very sad about it.  But, I try to look on the bright side.  I have been depressed and crying a lot, but don't want to take any meds.  I work two jobs, and can barely walk most of the time.  My full time job is giving me guff suddenly about my attitude at work, saying, after nearly two years with absolutely no complaints from my employer, they are now saying that I have been a problem, and asked me to pre-pay all my employer sponsored health care premiums up front before going on maternity leave.  OK, I get it, you don't want me to return to work, but you won't say it to my pregnant face. In the meantime, making issues up about me isn't helping, it makes me afraid to go to work, and depressed all day.  I have been on work restrictions that are impossible for me, since the staff don't make any accommodations for me, and being the office manager, I have a job to do if nobody else does theirs properly, leaving me to do things I am not supposed to at this point in my pregnancy.  My second job, being all men, is fine, they would carry me up and down stairs if I let them.  That's one good thing.  So, I will just go to work full time at my second job, which also happens to be my husband's company with another business partner.  I am just trying to get through this without any more complications from my placenta previa, but I have contractions and bargained with my doctor for just a few more weeks of work with strict restrictions.  But, I am so depressed that even when I want to cry, I can't because I know the baby will become upset, and when I cry, she moves a lot, making me cry more.  I would quit today and take maternity, except that I work two jobs and at least one of them is my hookup for after I have the baby, to be able to work and bring her with me.  The pressure and stress are making it hard to do anything. I feel like, even my husband doesn't understand and my being upset about it only makes him upset too.
 
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12-22-2012 at 6:33 PM
KmfMjf1024
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Joined on 07-27-2012
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KmfMjf1024 is not online. Last active: 05-07-2013, 8:50 PMNewbie
Hang in there :/ it's only a few more weeks. I'm 29 weeks as well and a lot of times it feels like I cry and get upset a lot more easily. Usually letting it out and having an actual good cry, and taking a few minutes to take deep breaths, helps me feel a lot better.
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12-22-2012 at 8:37 PM
JessandKev...
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Joined on 09-20-2009
8 Posts
156 Points
JessandKevSanDiego is not online. Last active: 04-08-2013, 2:33 PMNewbie
I know, I will make it, and life goes on.  Things will be so different after I have my baby and it will all be behind me, in the meantime, it sucks that it seems like nobody understands.  I am the first one at my office to have a baby, and my other job is a bunch of dudes who would carry me everywhere I wanted to go, if I asked.  I just feel like I am being harassed and there is not anything I can do.  When I worked with a pregnant gal a few years ago, I helped her a lot, it was hard, it made my job more work, but she had a baby inside of her, so I volunteered to jobs she couldn't.  Nobody does that for me where I work, except when I go in and work with the guys from my husband's company. Thanks, I will hang in there.  :)
 
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12-22-2012 at 11:00 PM
milesfromt...
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milesfromthesun is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 1:15 AMNewbie
I think I know how you feel. I had to start my leave two months early.
I have a very physically demanding job, working with tile and flooring.
Work didn't seem to care to put me there by myself and I was expected to do all this crap by myself. I had horrible morning sickness for 6 months, so I had to call out a lot :
It got to the point where I wasn't going to have enough fmla time to take when LO got here. So, I took a leave of absence. Basically kicking myself off the corporate ladder I've been climbing for 12 years. Very depressing to say the least. I was hysterical crying in the HR office because I didn't want to "admit defeat". But now, I've been home for a month, and it was the best decision I could have made. Your health, both mental and physical, have to come first. I tried pushing myself so hard that I broke. Now being home and having the time to come to grips with my depression has really helped.
And I know my baby will be happier not having mommy crying all the time :

You can do this, hang in there, and put you 1.
 
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12-23-2012 at 2:57 PM
JessandKev...
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Joined on 09-20-2009
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JessandKevSanDiego is not online. Last active: 04-08-2013, 2:33 PMNewbie
Wow, thanks.  It's good to know I am not the only one getting shafted in a difficult pregnancy.  People can be so cruel and inconsiderate.  Everyone has babies, why can't everyone get together to realize that one day, they may be in our shoes, so be nicer to pregnant ladies, you may be pregnant one day and need someone to understand.  I am swollen, fat, tired, having complications and working while having to pee every two minutes and deal with drama at work!  I am so glad I can leave work soon, then have a new life with my baby afterward.  In the meantime, it just hurts to have to give up my career and struggle to be the same person I used to be before all this.  I know we will get through this and I will be over the rainbow when my baby is here.
 
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12-23-2012 at 3:49 PM
Runaway22
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Runaway22 is online. Last active: 05-20-2013, 4:25 AMSilver

KmfMjf1024:
Hang in there :/ it's only a few more weeks. I'm 29 weeks as well and a lot of times it feels like I cry and get upset a lot more easily. Usually letting it out and having an actual good cry, and taking a few minutes to take deep breaths, helps me feel a lot better.

This. I'm not an expert, but it seems a common complaint of women at 29 weeks. I know it was for me. The weepiness and sadness were almost overwhelming. In my case it got better. Hang in there, mamas! :) 
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12-25-2012 at 3:35 AM
JessandKev...
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Joined on 09-20-2009
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JessandKevSanDiego is not online. Last active: 04-08-2013, 2:33 PMNewbie

Thanks.  But now my husband is being a jerk, it's like I have nobody on my side. His mother showed up for Christmas and now all he does is cut me down in front of her.  He got so angry with me for asking to make the  bed and when I asked what was wrong he started yelling at me that I complain too much about my work situation.  I am so depressed. I let loose to him a few days ago about all the pressure from work and he just asked why I can't get a normal job.  Wow, I walked away and forgot about it.  He has been ignoring me ever since. He's been such a jerk.  He won't help me lift anything heavy and I fell yesterday in the hallway, when I tripped over the cat and dog running over my feet playing.  I fell and it was pretty loud.  He was watching a movie about ten feet away.  I fell on all fours and asked for him to come help me, he remained on the couch and asked why he had to come help me.  I said that I fell and hurt my hand.  His reply was to ask why I was yelling at him about it.  Later that night I asked why he was so upset with me and he just said he is tired of my complaining so much, especially about work.  I told him I am going through a lot of depression and pain and who else can I talk to if not him, he said he didn't want to talk about it right now.  I think he never wanted me to become pregnant. We have been in therapy for over a year now and I have been adhering to all our therapist's guidance and advice, he has not.  He hasn't been at all supportive of my being pregnant and stopped touching me, talking to me, or caring about me.  It may be that the pregnancy has driven us further apart, and I wish he would just leave if he can't handle it.  I can't deal with it right now.

 
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