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12-24-2012 at 7:27 AM
Nineoceans
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Nineoceans is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 2:17 PMBronze

BFR New Years Resolutions?

Hey ladies thought we could start off the new year right with some blended fam resolutions.

Mine is to ask myself "does it fulfill me spiritually or mentally" before I do or get upset about anything.

Specifically I am going to stop checking Bm's Facebook page. It doesn't fulfill me to know what shes doing and I can actually rest assured whatever she is doing would either annoy me or worry me so what's the point in knowing the details?

Whenever I get the urge to check her Facebook or dwell on a negative detail about her I am going to clean a part of the house instead. Negative energy turned to a positive outcome! Bonus is it reduces my stress so much when I have a cleaner home.

What are some other resolutions you guys have decided on?

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12-24-2012 at 8:03 AM
awesomenus...
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awesomenus1341 is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 6:54 AMNewbie
Nineoceans:
Hey ladies thought we could start off the new year right with some blended fam resolutions.

Mine is to ask myself "does it fulfill me spiritually or mentally" before I do or get upset about anything.

Specifically I am going to stop checking Bm's Facebook page. It doesn't fulfill me to know what shes doing and I can actually rest assured whatever she is doing would either annoy me or worry me so what's the point in knowing the details?

Whenever I get the urge to check her Facebook or dwell on a negative detail about her I am going to clean a part of the house instead. Negative energy turned to a positive outcome! Bonus is it reduces my stress so much when I have a cleaner home.

What are some other resolutions you guys have decided on?



Glad to know I'm not the only one who does this! If it helps, I ended up blocking her on Facebook, not because we ever really interact on there, but then her page will not show up to search or on friends pages if you have any mutual etc.. It took away the temptation to look because I would actually have to go to my settings and unblock her. That extra step made me stop and think how pointless, unfulfilling, and negative checking was in the first place.



BF resolution is to try to pick my battles. DH was such a huge push over when it came to BM due to a lot of guilt from their previous relationship that it infuriated me to watch her walk all over him because she knew she could. Now that a CO is in place and she has been put in her place, I've got to learn to let things go a lot more. When she tries to change things in her favor, my initial gut reaction is anger and it does no good for me, or dh, or the situation as a whole. I have to remind myself she has had to give up a lot in the past year and a little compromise is good for all of us.
 
12-24-2012 at 9:09 AM
Nineoceans
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Nineoceans is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 2:17 PMBronze
Amazing idea! I just went through and blocked her and her family. Not sure why I never thought about that but it feels awesome not to have the temptation at all any more!

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12-24-2012 at 12:55 PM
MarSamWhit...
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MarSamWhitney is not online. Last active: 05-11-2013, 8:12 AMGold
I could have wrote that exactly! lol! I let BM bother me too much, and truthfully our relationship is the best its been!  My BF resolutions are to try not to let things bother me so much, and also to try to connect more with my SS. He is rolling on 15 and it is getting more and more tough, but i'll keep trying.

Whitney Venessa

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12-24-2012 at 4:05 PM
Cheerilee
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Cheerilee is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 10:24 AMSilver
I have two resolutions.

1. I'm going to stop caring about BM having no desire to see SS. It's her loss and SS seems unaffected. She blew off her visit today and it was my last straw.

2. I'm done with my own ex SF. He abused me, my mother, and my brother for my whole childhood. My mom has pushed me since their divorce to maintain a relationship with him. In July, he and his wife called to berate me for not listing him as my father on Facebook and it made me realize I'm an adult and don't have to listen to his insults anymore. I had planned on letting him meet DD but decided instead that I'm done. I blocked him and his wife on Facebook so they'd never pop up to tempt me.

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"To be able to practice five things everywhere under heaven constitutes perfect virtue...gravity, generosity of soul, sincerity, earnestness, and kindness."  
12-24-2012 at 9:53 PM
*HiS ChAmA...
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Kapolei Hawaii
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*HiS ChAmAoLe GiRL* is online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 3:42 PMSilver
My bf resolution is to wash my hands of the responsibility I have taken care of over the years. I'm tired of being the middle man with bm and DH. It's not as bad as it used to be and I don't do as much as I used to but I'm just about done doing anything. It exhausts me and I deserve a break.

BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012

BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013

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12-26-2012 at 8:00 AM
Mama2TwoBo...
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Mama2TwoBoys is not online. Last active: 01-31-2013, 8:15 AMNewbie

I am going to focus on making as many positive memories with SS as possible. I will try my hardest to foster his love of cooking and art.

I will also try to keep my frustrations and anger to a minimum, and try to remember that he's only three. It's hard not to be mad when he accidentally spills the cake batter everywhere, or drops an open marker on his clothes and the carpet. I hope to find a balance when it comes to discipline. I am also going to read the parenting books that I found helpful again. 

 


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