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12-24-2012 at 2:22 PM
cody&dez
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cody&dez is not online. Last active: 01-14-2013, 8:34 PMNewbie

Just need support

I just needed to post a quick blurb before I go crazy. We are TTC, but the DH works overnights, and has an internship, and goes to school, so he is never in the mood, and when he tries to force it, his body won't cooperate. I'm hoping this will change soon... its just been making me sad. No amount of help or sexy clothes have been helping. I can't wait until he graduates this summer. *Sigh*

 That is all, I can't tell my friends because they will just spout the usual 'you just started trying' or 'you have time' or the dreaded 'maybe you should wait until this summer.' I don't want to hear this, I just want to get pregnant.

 That is all, it just feels food to write how I am feeling.

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12-24-2012 at 2:31 PM
Sto71
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Sorry things are overwhelming right now for you! Its tough! Just hang in there and keep thinking it will happen! Might not be this very moment but it will! Good Luck
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12-24-2012 at 2:57 PM
krystlelyn...
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I understand it can feel overwhelming. My husband and I work opposite shifts and sometimes his body doesn't want to cooperate either so I know how frustrating that can feel...just don't let it discourage you and don't drudge it up every time it happens either because it can be very discouraging for YH and make him feel bad and make it worse because he can't help it. Good luck!

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12-24-2012 at 3:38 PM
aislinsmom
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aislinsmom is not online. Last active: 05-23-2013, 10:25 PMNewbie

Hi, I understand how you feel.  Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.  We are TTC for #2.  My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.  If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.  But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.  One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.  I just did whatever I thought would relax him - tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retarted strip-tease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure- you know, just anything to be totally silly.  We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :)

HTH!!!
Alaina
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12-24-2012 at 3:43 PM
krptcmschf...
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aislinsmom:

Hi, I understand how you feel.  Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.  We are TTC for #2.  My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.  If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.  But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.  One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.  I just did whatever I thought would relax him - tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retarted strip-tease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure- you know, just anything to be totally silly.  We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :)

HTH!!!
Alaina

 

I second just having fun with it. H and I definitely just are goofy sometimes during/before sex, and it works for us.


Started dating DH 06/06/2009

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12-24-2012 at 4:34 PM
tinab3
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Is he on board with TTC?  From what you are describing, it doesn't really sound like it is good timing right now for him.  At least you know that school will be finishing up this summer, so hopefully some of his stress will be relieved with that.  Do you usually have a general idea of when your FW will be?  Maybe giving him a heads up as to where your peak days are will better prepare him for that time.  I know it can be hard with timing when you have different schedules or things going on that prevent you from HIO.  At least if he knows when the timing is right, maybe he'll have a better mindset with the whole situation.  I know I always do better with a schedule when I am super busy just to keep everything straight and keep my mind focused on where it needs to be.  Hope things get better for you!
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12-24-2012 at 5:27 PM
katharineb...
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Sorry this is happening. I have the opposite problem. Im dying for for DC #2, and I work full time, im in graduate school, and I have internships as well. Its hards, you just gonna do the best you can, with what you have right now. I find myself exhausted all the time, and sometimes i have to force myself to get into, not b.c i dont want too, but b/c im utterly exhausted. It will happen.  (((hugs))) Merry Christmas!!
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12-24-2012 at 6:42 PM
CiderWench
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I agree with your friends — you just started trying and have plenty of time. Also, it sounds like your husband is exhausted. Your "I want a baby right now" attitude at the expense of his needs is really immature and selfish.
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12-25-2012 at 12:20 AM
ColeRose
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CiderWench:
I agree with your friends — you just started trying and have plenty of time. Also, it sounds like your husband is exhausted. Your "I want a baby right now" attitude at the expense of his needs is really immature and selfish.

Yes  Dude, he has a lot going on, of course no amount of "sexy" clothes are helping. Give him a break.
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12-25-2012 at 10:55 AM
EmAre
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aislinsmom:
Hi, I understandnbsp;how you feel.nbsp; Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.nbsp; We are TTC for 2.nbsp; My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.nbsp; If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.nbsp; But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.nbsp; One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.nbsp; I just did whatever I thought would relax him tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retartednbsp;striptease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure you know, just anything to be totally silly.nbsp; We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :HTH!!!Alaina


Seriously?

Please educate yourself on why the term "retarded" is derogatory and offensive.
 
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12-25-2012 at 2:44 PM
leahaustin
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My DH works 2 jobs one is first shift and the other is third shift so I experience similar feelings. I recently just finished school and I work full time and it was really hard to spend time with one another. I am so glad that I am graduated now because we have time to TTC now. I hope you don't have to wait to TTC until he graduates. : Good luck!
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12-25-2012 at 3:19 PM
gardennymp...
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EmAre:
aislinsmom:
Hi, I understandnbsp;how you feel.nbsp; Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.nbsp; We are TTC for 2.nbsp; My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.nbsp; If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.nbsp; But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.nbsp; One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.nbsp; I just did whatever I thought would relax him tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retartednbsp;striptease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure you know, just anything to be totally silly.nbsp; We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :HTH!!!Alaina


Seriously?

Please educate yourself on why the term "retarded" is derogatory and offensive.

I found a lot in this post to offensive. Besides using the R term, " like you had some sort if seizure is pretty bad too. My mother has epilepsy and it is no where near funny or relaxing when she has a seizure. If you can't explain things better than that then GTFO.
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12-26-2012 at 10:25 AM
Slapalicio...
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EmAre:
aislinsmom:
Hi, I understandnbsp;how you feel.nbsp; Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.nbsp; We are TTC for 2.nbsp; My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.nbsp; If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.nbsp; But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.nbsp; One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.nbsp; I just did whatever I thought would relax him tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retartednbsp;striptease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure you know, just anything to be totally silly.nbsp; We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :HTH!!!Alaina
Seriously? Please educate yourself on why the term "retarded" is derogatory and offensive.

This.

\m/ (>.<) \m/



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12-26-2012 at 11:18 AM
madasm0530
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Slapptastic:

EmAre:
aislinsmom:
Hi, I understandnbsp;how you feel.nbsp; Just thought I'd pipe in with my 2 cents.nbsp; We are TTC for 2.nbsp; My husband is working a lot more hours lately, and is tired when he comes home.nbsp; If I try and take the "sexy" tactic, he sometimes just waves me off and claims he's too exhausted.nbsp; But lately I find that if I approach the situation with humor, it work out a lot better.nbsp; One night I just went up to him and did this funny little dance in front of him, just really goofy, and said "It's time to do the Baby Dance!" and I just acted really silly until he started laughing.nbsp; I just did whatever I thought would relax him tickle him, act like a total goof, doing like a retartednbsp;striptease that made me look like I was having some sort of seizure you know, just anything to be totally silly.nbsp; We were both laughing as we rolled onto the bed and the rest is history! :HTH!!!Alaina
Seriously? Please educate yourself on why the term "retarded" is derogatory and offensive.

This.

 This x2. Please expand your vocabulary
DH & I married 5/2009 :: DX with PCOS 7/2009
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cycle 3: bfp, edd 5/16/13. mc at 7w4d.
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12-26-2012 at 1:57 PM
cody&dez
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cody&dez is not online. Last active: 01-14-2013, 8:34 PMNewbie

Thanks everyone!

Although I'm not a fan of the language either, I hadn't thought of taking the silly route to relax him. He is totally on board for TTC, it's just his schedule that derails us. He complains about wanting to but just not having the energy. Luckily, I got a definite positive on my ovulation test yesterday and he was actually up for it, I didn't even have to remind him, I just told him in the morning that it was a good day to try if he was up for it, and he was. He even told me today that he wasn't sure if his body would cooperate, but that he would try really hard to have sex the next few nights in a row to increase our chances.

I am trying hard not to push too hard and be as open with him as possible. It will happen one way or another. It's just difficult.

 Thank you all for being supportive and not judging me (too much). 

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