Thanks for sharing jen.
I, personally, disagree with her recommendation to ignore "us" on Mother's Day. I was ignored on Mother's Day, and it hurt like hell. I know some people would rather avoid it, which I understand, too. But I already had my motherhood, and most of my hope for future motherhood, taken from me. Some sort of gesture from those closest to me, even just a "hey, I'm thinking about you" text, would have been nice.
I also go back and forth on being asked about our struggle. It depends on who it is. When those closest to me don't ask, I assume they're tired of hearing about it, so I don't mention it either. And that hurts too. But I know a lot of people don't want to be asked.
Just goes to show there really is no "right" thing to do or say. (There certainly are a lot of "wrong" things, though!)