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12-24-2012 at 9:50 PM
Dani428
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Dani428 is online. Last active: 06-18-2013, 9:37 PMBronze

Didn't go as planned

My grandma is 90 and starting to lose her mind sadly. Well I was so excited to share the news about being pregnant today. It was only my grandma, parents, aunt and uncle so it was small and personal. Well, grandma is mad that she wasn't the first one to know and made me feel terrible!!! She didn't let it go all night and it ruined the whole vibe of the evening. She even cried saying how disappointed she was! I feel like a terrible person.

I'm sorry I just had to vent and get that off my chest. I hope the announcement goes better for anyone else who is planning on announcing during the holidays.
12-24-2012 at 10:28 PM
KathleenPe...
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Aww I'm so sorry! : that's no fun at all and not to sound mean, but she should realize this isn't about her! : you told her at the same time as everyone else, it's not like she's the last to know... And this is about you and your happiness. I am so sorry. My reveal to the inlaws Saturday went really well, but we're announcing via Skype tomorrow to my parents and my SIL who is with my parents called me freaking out because my mom asked her today if she knew I was preggo, and she lied and said she didn't think I was. Go SIL trying to keep it special for me, but I'm afraid their reaction to my news will be a bit disappointing since they somehow got tipped off. I am sorry yours didn't go well. Make yourself a milkshake or whatever you crave and cheer yourself up with something fun like a pedicure!! You deserve to be happy and enjoy this time... Hopefully the other people you tell in the future will be just as excited as you are!
 
12-24-2012 at 10:47 PM
Dani428
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Thank you SO MUCH for your reply!! Since the dimensia started she has been irritable and everything has to revolve around her. It's so sad and absolutely breaks my heart.

I'm sure your announcement will go GREAT tomorrow even if they have an idea. Skype is such a great idea! I'm sending positive vibes your way. GOOD LUCK!
12-24-2012 at 11:45 PM
StarshineR
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Hey Dani, your grandma is old and is "losing her mind". Don't take it personally. She's just going through a tough time. (((hug)))) I know you must have felt awful, and no, you are not a terrible person. Maybe she feels ignored and unloved at this sensitive time, and she's not thinking straight and maybe if you made her feel special for a day or so, she'll feel better.

I know she's being selfish, but she's old and she'll probably not be with you very long. You'll likely have your child for the rest of your life, but grandma? Grandma needs to feel like you care for her. You are not a terrible person. Don't worry about that. 

I feel awful for you that this happened to you. I feel bad for the grandma, too. It must be a really lonely time for her. :( 

 
12-24-2012 at 11:47 PM
Chunkymonk...
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Chunkymonkeylvr is online. Last active: 06-18-2013, 9:37 PMBronze
Remember that was not your grandmother talking. I remember going through this with mine. You didn't really break her heart and she probably won't remember it tomorrow, it's just hard on you. Breath, you couldn't have done it "right"
12-25-2012 at 2:07 AM
araesm
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I'm sorry she made you feel bad. I know it's hard even when you know it wasn't her, it was her bad health.

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12-25-2012 at 5:57 AM
Alicia0817
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Chunkymonkeylvr:
Remember that was not your grandmother talking. I remember going through this with mine. You didn't really break her heart and she probably won't remember it tomorrow, it's just hard on you. Breath, you couldn't have done it "right"


Well put. My grandmom had Alzheimer's for several years before she passed and was so mean to so many people. It's sad, and you have to remember its really hard for her.



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12-25-2012 at 7:42 AM
Stina2012
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Chunkymonkeylvr:
Remember that was not your grandmother talking. I remember going through this with mine. You didn't really break her heart and she probably won't remember it tomorrow, it's just hard on you. Breath, you couldn't have done it "right"

My Nana can be like this intermittently as well. It made wedding planning a joy! When my Nana would say something nasty I'd just try to remember one of my favorite memories of her. It would help calm me down. 


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12-25-2012 at 7:54 AM
Dani428
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Dani428 is online. Last active: 06-18-2013, 9:37 PMBronze
 I feel so bad for her...the dimentia is getting worse and it breaks my heart. I hope her mind stays with her until we have baby.  Thank you for your reply and the (((hug)))!
12-25-2012 at 8:29 AM
PrimRoseMa...
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I'm sorry. I know its hard on you, but really your Grandmama won't remember anything tomorrow. Dementia can rob them of their normally happy dispositions.

My Grandmother is going through the same thing (95 years old) and she just kind of shrugged and went on when I told her about her second Great Grandbaby. She didn't mean to act like it was NBD, but I don't think things really register with her very quickly anymore. It kind of hurt my feelings so I understand where you are coming from, but truly it has very little to do with you and very much to do with their decreasing awareness.  


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12-25-2012 at 3:47 PM
queenbone
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I'm sorry, that's really disappointing.

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