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12-25-2012 at 9:27 AM
brockerln
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brockerln is not online. Last active: 04-01-2013, 8:10 PMNewbie

PGAL and announcing to the parents

This holiday DH and I told our parents, despite our plans to wait until either we confirm a HB on an US or the latest the end of the first trimester.  However, hormonal me decided it would be a good idea to tell the ILs on Sunday because I hate feeling like I'm keeping secrets from our family.  So I guess the cat is out of the bag, so this little bean better keep growing or else we'll be dealing with another horribly disappointed family:(  I also figured that I will tell them if it doesn't work out anyway, so I guess it's better to have them know as I'm going through it all so I can stop making up stories why I can't eat certain things etc...  

With my first MC, I told our parents right away, and then my mother told EVERYONE.  And so when it happened, I made her call everyone back and tell them what happened.  With the ectopic, I told my parents only when I learned it was no longer viable and that I needed to get the D&C and then later the MTX after they confirmed it was indeed an ectopic. I'm very nervous about telling my mom today. She's not very supportive in that she is in complete denial that it is possible for her offspring to have difficulties being pregnant.  I'd rather my parents share in my hesitancy to get excited about this PG, than just sitting there congratulating me and planning for a future baby.  

 
12-25-2012 at 12:57 PM
California...
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CaliforniaDream87 is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 12:22 PMSilver
FX for a sticky baby for you!

I'm also PGAL but only my mother and DH know. We will be announcing after the 12th week. I say, everyone is different and if you want the support of others definitely tell!


PAL/PgAL Always Welcome. EDD is 08/14/2013. Missed Miscarriage EDD: 08/25/2012-"I loved your for a thousand years and I will love you for a thousand more" Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie Pregnancy tickers 
12-25-2012 at 1:17 PM
CarliVelcr...
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CarliVelcro is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 10:54 PMNewbie
Congrats and wishing you a H H pregnancy. I'm also PGAL and I would have loved to give everyone happy news for Christmas everyone has such cool and fun ideas on how to tell their families. But I really want to wait this time, my mom put out a mass Facebook message last time after I specifically said family and close friends only. After its all said and done ill probably burst before New Years anyway, It's just too darn exciting to keep it in!
 
12-25-2012 at 1:38 PM
meegie-lee
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meegie-lee is not online. Last active: 05-17-2013, 5:25 PMBronze

I told my Mom with all my pregnancies because she's my rock. However, when I got pregnant in February we told our families early, and I really didn't like that my ILs knew that I had a m/c...I'm pretty private, and I just felt like it was an elephant in the room for many months.

So, we didn't tell them with the second pregnancy or m/c, and haven't told them with this one yet even though we've been at their house for a few days. DH and I decided that we would tell if I got really sick or something became super obvious, but so far my m/s is pretty mild. 

Tell only who you feel comfortable with. It's not always easy though, for sure. 

 


Mom to Claire (b. 8/16/2010)
BFP 2/25/12, m/c @ 6w 3d || BFP 8/1/12, m.m/c @ 9w5d  
12-25-2012 at 2:25 PM
Lilmrslay
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Lilmrslay is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 6:17 AMNewbie

I am 7 weeks pregnant after 2 losses and I totally share your concern. 

I have told my mother, and my 2 best friends but no one else so far. As it was, my mother posted on my Facebook "Thanks for the exciting news" and I had to whip it off before anyone figured it out (Hopefully). She is pretty hopeless with a) keeping her mouth shut b) understanding that ALL of my friends see her posts to me.

We haven't told the in-laws yet and probably only will after 12 weeks. They don't know about any of my other pregnancies or losses either as they are just not that good at understanding and supporting the harder stuff in life. They tend to want to brush over everything and say things like "Oh well, try again."

My husband did blurt out to his ex and his son last night on Skype though, which I felt really funny about. I absolutely love them both and we are all very close but I just don't want too many people knowing and getting all excited as I hate the feeling of letting them down if things don't work out.

I just HATE PgAL for the fact that I can't just be excited and want to share the news!!


TTC Since March 2010 - 5 rounds of Clomid -BFP July 12 m/c @ 5 weeks - BFP September 12 m/c @ 5 weeks - BFP December 12 EDD 12 Aug 13 - First U/S showed a HB of 182bpm and HCG 56000! Lilypie Maternity tickers Image and video hosting by TinyPic 
12-25-2012 at 5:40 PM
buggirl72
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buggirl72 is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 1:57 PMSilver

I understand. With our first pregnancy, MH told everyone immediately. I waited to tell anyone in my family until 8 weeks and did not make a big announcement until after our nt scan.

This time, MH said he wants to wait until we confirm a HB.  I almost told my SIL last night because she is the only person we will probably tell if this ends up in a m/c. 


Zachary Donald born 9/22/2012 at 20 weeks. Today, I dreamed I kissed your fingers and heard you laugh. I will always love you my sweet boy.
TTCAL May Sig Challenge: Favorite Flower



Congrats to GavinRonansMom! Grow baby grow!
A miracle is what seems impossible but happens anyways
BFP#1 06/08/2012 EDD 02/07/2013, born 09/22/2012 PTL due to placental abruption
BFP#2 12/21/2012 EDD 08/27/2013, CP@4w6d
BFP#3 01/21/2013 EDD 10/02/2013, 7 betas, 3 u/s, confirmed not viable. M/C 02/26/2013
***PgAL/PAL Always Welcome*** 
12-25-2012 at 5:48 PM
katharine2...
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katharine25 is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 9:10 AMGold
I just told my mother: My first she had told everyone under the sun before I was even 6w. We didn't miscarry until after the 12w point and it oddly landed up being somewhat easier having everyone know already and get the support rather than explain it or hide it. The past 3 pgs I've told her in the midst of a miscarriage, because I needed her, but they certainly weren't happy moments.

It was really nice to surprise her with good news and a sense of hope this time. But of course she's been sworn to secrecy until we're ready to tell.

***I can spell, my iphone can't***
Married My Love on 6/18/2006
BFP#1 10/1/2011. Our perfect little girl, Her heart stopped @ 12w1d. D&E 11/23/11
BFP#2 3/13/12 Weird CP/Possible EP @ 6w0d
BFP#3 5/28/12 CP @ 5w0d
BFP/WTF#4 10/26/12 CP
BFP#5 12/10/12 EDD 8/23/2013 Boy oh Boy!!
Chasing a Rainbow: The Chart/The Fruit
 photo ellie.gif Photobucket
“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.” - Walt Disney
AL Always Welcome  
12-25-2012 at 5:57 PM
brockerln
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brockerln is not online. Last active: 04-01-2013, 8:10 PMNewbie
Thanks all for your comments. I ended up telling my mother tonight.  She seemed a lot more understanding this time around and my continued precautions about planning for a future baby I think finally sunk in.  
 
12-27-2012 at 10:13 AM
ktbelle121...
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ktbelle1211 is not online. Last active: 02-01-2013, 3:55 PMNewbie

Fx crossed for you.  I have a similar situation.  My significant other's family is VERY happy and supporitve about the new baby.  They knew about the m/c and were supportive.  However, my parents are not his biggest fan.  Since we haven't gotten married yet, and because three of my best friends have had m/c I didn't want to tell ANYONE until I heard the heartbeat.  I did tell my mom about hte m/c, primarily because my s/o was out of town with work and I needed someone to take me home after the D&C.

I completely understand where you are coming from.  I have not told anyone about the baby except one close friend.  I have been worried enough about the pregnancy that I do not want any extra stress or comments until I have heard a heartbeat.  I of course will tell my parents once that happens but not until...

We also haven't told my stepdaughter yet.  My s/o told her as soon as we found out just because he was so happy and has 2 daughters so he never thought a m/c could happen.  It was the worst thing have to explain to a 2 year old why her baby wasn't coming. 

Best of luck to you in breaking the news to your family!!



 BabyFetus Ticker

"Even miracles take a little time." Cinderella

BFP #1: 07.13.2012, EDD 03.06.2013, 1st U/S 08.02.2012 - no heart beat, D&C 08.02.2012 *Squirrel*

BFP #2: 12.09.2012, EDD 08.21.2013



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