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01-03-2013 at 11:06 AM
dede0726
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Who knows about your IF??

DH and I have been very open about our IF struggles with our families and friends and sometimes I wish we wouldn't have said anything at all. Most of the family just reads our blog updates and other than asking questions when I see them just lets it be. However, my little sister works in an OB clinic and think she knows everything about everything we are going through. My step mom offers all sorts of unsolicited and completely unhelpful advice. My dad passes wrong and inaccurate information on to other family members.

Does your family know about your IF?? How do you handle it??


Me - 35 DH - 37 SD - 10
Married 10/8/2011
Started TTC July 2011. Infertility workup July & August 2012.
DH - all clear. Me - Unicornuate Uterus discovered at HSG 8/16/12. Referred for IVF 8/28/12. Approved for IVF Warranty Program 10/2/12. Laparoscopy 11/1/12 - removed right rudamentary horn, both tubes, left ovarian cyst and endometriosis. Given all clear for pregnancy after 1/1/2013.
IVF cycle 1 starts 1/19/13!
12 eggs, 7 mature and all 7 fertilized - 2 Frosties!!
5 day SET 2/4/13 - Beta 2/13: 86 & 2/15: 186 BFP!!!!
EDD: October, 23, 2013
Blog: http://journeyofaplayer.wordpress.com/
 
01-03-2013 at 11:10 AM
LaineyPane...
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PAIF response:
We were very open about all of our IF stuff.
....but, then again, the know it all little sister has GOT to be annoying! I didn't have that to contend with...

wedding countdown  
01-03-2013 at 11:22 AM
PokerChic8...
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This is a very touchy topic for me

DH and I only told our parents; My parents are doctors so totally understand... His don't quite get it, but keep their distance about it because we've asked them not to bring it up, but only told them due to DH needing surgery.  My DH also told my BIL without me knowing, incase he had the same issue DH has... well BIL told his wife, who's a b*itch and told the entire family... Many of which we dislike and never intended for them to know because they're nasty, mean, jerks.

So - my advice is this. If you tell one person, be sure you don't mind everyone knowing all of your business. We were okay with our rents' knowing, but BIL I was pretty pissed about because I knew it would get out.

I call my mom almost daily to update her- and it's really nice to be able to talk to her. Everyone else I just stay quite around; mainly because if IVF doesn't work, I don't want to have to deal with a thousand "I'm sorry" or "It will happen" remarks.  And people on DHs side are cruel, and I'm sure would have something horrible to say. But now I'm F'd when it comes to that because they all know.

There's my rant/vent/advice. GL!  


TTC since early 2011 “I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much.” -Mother Teresa  
01-03-2013 at 11:23 AM
JewelsW198...
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Everyone knows about our IF struggles and our treatment plan except this time we've opted to tell no one but our Pastor about our FET cycle.  We struggled alone for 2 years and when we hit that 2 year mark and everyone was asking us when we're going to have babies we finally told everyone, mainly to get them off my back.  Now I blog and everyone seems to know when the right time to ask questions and when not too. 


* Me- 32 * DH- 32 * TTC for 4 Years
* *IUIs 1-6 BFN*
*IVF #1= BFP- M/C *FET- * *Beta#1: 69 *Beta#2:482 *Beta#3 1088
*Beta#4 28,318 * Ultrasound- 1 beautiful heartbeat
IT'S A BOY!!! MAX LIAM
 
01-03-2013 at 11:24 AM
J&D2007
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Not a soul knows about it. I mentioned to my mom once that we were having trouble conceiving, but that's all I said.


Me: 35, DH: 36, ttc: 3+ years, dx: unknown
10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid med & normal hsg),
12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s,
1/12: D&C,
6/12 IUI #1: clomid, 5 mature follicles, excellent sperm,= BFN,
7/12: IUI #2: clomid, 3 mature follicles, excellent sperm= BFN,
8/12: IUi #3: clomid, 5 follicles, = BFP!, C/P
10/12 IVF #1: FSH 5.4, estradiol AFC: 14, long Lupron 150/bravelle75,5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast and 1 8 cell transferred. No frosties. BFN
IVF #2: AFC 21, MD lupron 12/25, 225bravelle/150men, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast BFN
IVF #3: natural start antagon, starting 3/30, ER 4/11, 12R,11M,10F
.
[IMG]http://i248.photobucket.com/albums/gg174/pixydust3084/April_V2.jpg%5B/IMG] 
01-03-2013 at 11:25 AM
tptbabe
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Sorry your family is being a pain!

My mother knows, my best girlfriend, our ND and her DH (Since they're actually friends of ours too), and a few of our closest couple friends (since one couple did IVF last year, and another is going through the adoption process right now - They are also severe MFI).


My Ovulation Chart
TTC with MFI and poor ovulation since 03/11
TCM and progesterone supplements
Early loss in 08/11
MFI Dx in 03/12 Low count, low motility, poor morphology and high levels of anti-sperm antibodies
Treated with supplements and TCM. Much lower on all factors. Count too low to test for anti-bodies
Met with new urologist 11/12
IUI #1 12/12: Letrozole + Gonal-F = BFN
DH started Clomid 01/13
New SA shows 33 million sperm! Thank you Clomid!!!
Discovered I am hypothyroid 04/13 waiting for specialist appointment
Hoping to try IUI again in July?
 
01-03-2013 at 11:27 AM
BellaLux
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Just a few, and that's really only been the last few months. Our immediate family and a few close friends. My DH is very private, so most of the updates are provided by me. For the most part, our families have been as supportive/sensitive as could be expected...I don't really expect for them to fully understand how we feel.

~TTC#1 Since July 2011~
Dx: 10/10 - Fibroids; 6/12 - Tubal Infertility
9/12 -IVF w/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol)=BFFN
Next: Feb 2013 -Myomectomy
S/PAIF Welcome
Daisypath Anniversary tickers  
01-03-2013 at 11:29 AM
cupcake201
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I have one close friend who I told and I am glad I have someone to share everything with aside from all my fellow bumpies! I didn't want to share with family and friends because we are fairly private anyway, but I didn't want to deal with the stress of people asking a million questions while we were going through the process. LOL I knew my mom and MIL would've driven me nuts!!!

Sometimes I wish I was totally open about everything when I do need support, but I am so glad I have this board for that. When we started our first IVF I did start a private blog documenting everything, which I will share with our families and close friends when the time comes.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

TTC#1 since 4/11 : m/c in 9/11 & 11/11
DH dx with Balanced Translocation 5/12
10/12 IVF#1-7R, 3M, 3F- No transfer - Froze 2.
IVF#2 1/13 - 11R, 10M, 6F, no transfer
IVF#3 4/13 - 8R, 6M, 6F, 1 passed PGD and was transfered 5/2/13
S/PAIF Welcome
 
01-03-2013 at 11:32 AM
asilwhite
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My parents, ILs, and siblings know. My boss also knows because I need to be late for work sometimes, take time off, etc. and I found out she had her daughter through IVF, so she TOTALLY gets it and is so supportive and understanding. I seriously couldn't ask for a better situation there!

I get unsolicited advice/comments from my ILs especially. My FIL is a know-it-all and is very religious and says stuff all the time about "when it's God's will it will happen" - I just roll my eyes most of the time and try not to let it bother me, but one time it really bothered me (stupid hormones) I actually told him to never say that to me ever again, that it was cruel and didn't help and since then he's kept his mouth shut. My SIL also got KU the first month she tried and is now I believe trying for #2, so just my luck she'll be KU again before I'm pregnant with #1, so she has absolutely no idea and has said to me on numerous occasions to hump it out, uh huh, wish it were that easy! Bottom line is that I'm glad I told my close family members because the majority of the time they've been very supportive, but I was also prepared for the unsolicited stupid comments, which I can't let get to me. Since I don't let them bother me most of the time, I'm glad my family knows so we're not completely alone with this.

I will not tell anyone except my mom and sister our exact ER and ET dates though and will probably fib about the beta date because I don't want to have to let everyone down if it's a BFN and couple days to get used to it ourselves before we tell anyone.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
TTC #1 since May 2011 | Me: 28, DH: 28 | DX: MFI
BFP #1 - April 15, 2012 (CP on April 17)
IUIs #1 - #3 (August - October '12) = BFFN
IVF #1.1 (Nov/Dec '12): Cancelled due to 18mm cyst - UGH
IVF #1.2 (Dec/Jan '12/'13): 5dt of 1 "perfect" 1AA blast on 1/26 (2 frosties) = BFP!!!
EDD October 14, 2013
Everyone welcome!
My Blog

Can't wait to meet our little boy!!  BabyFruit Ticker 
01-03-2013 at 11:33 AM
JewelsW198...
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I will add that NO ONE knows we're MFI and they assume that it's a female issue and I'm okay with that.

* Me- 32 * DH- 32 * TTC for 4 Years
* *IUIs 1-6 BFN*
*IVF #1= BFP- M/C *FET- * *Beta#1: 69 *Beta#2:482 *Beta#3 1088
*Beta#4 28,318 * Ultrasound- 1 beautiful heartbeat
IT'S A BOY!!! MAX LIAM
 
01-03-2013 at 12:13 PM
dede0726
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I am glad to hear I am not alone in this, but I am sorry that some of you are dealing with the same things. It got to the point with my little sister that I once told her should would find out when this all worked and that I didn't want to talk to her about it anymore. I try not to let the things that are said bother me, but sometimes my hormones get the best of me!

Me - 35 DH - 37 SD - 10
Married 10/8/2011
Started TTC July 2011. Infertility workup July & August 2012.
DH - all clear. Me - Unicornuate Uterus discovered at HSG 8/16/12. Referred for IVF 8/28/12. Approved for IVF Warranty Program 10/2/12. Laparoscopy 11/1/12 - removed right rudamentary horn, both tubes, left ovarian cyst and endometriosis. Given all clear for pregnancy after 1/1/2013.
IVF cycle 1 starts 1/19/13!
12 eggs, 7 mature and all 7 fertilized - 2 Frosties!!
5 day SET 2/4/13 - Beta 2/13: 86 & 2/15: 186 BFP!!!!
EDD: October, 23, 2013
Blog: http://journeyofaplayer.wordpress.com/
 
01-03-2013 at 12:20 PM
MJ14323
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We have been pretty open about it the past 6 months or so...mainly due to the fact that we hated hearing the "when will you have kids" question over and over again.  It does spread...so just be prepared for that.

We told DH's parents and asked them not to say anything to anyone as it was our business to tell.  A few months later we got a card in the mail from his aunt saying she was sorry to hear about my aunt's sudden passing and sorry that we were having trouble getting PG.  WHAT?? DH was so pissed that he called his mom right away.  Turnes out she told her entire side of the family. So even if you ask someone not to say anything, they will.  It's frustrating and I believe it is our business to tell people.


TTC since Nov 2010 | Me: 28, DH: 29 | SA & HSG Normal
IF Treatment started December 2011
Late DX DOR after 10 months of treatment | AMH-.23, FSH-11.1
Stag II Endo removed in July 2012
5 Rounds of Clomid(50-150mg), TI & IUI#1 = BFNs
3 Rounds of Femara(5mg) & Prog, TI, IUI#2, IUI#3 = BFNs
Supplements include DHEA, CoQL, L-Caratine, Vitamin C/D/B3, Fish Oil, and Prenatal
March IVF cycle canceled due to cyst
April IVF #1 - Lupron, Saizen, Menapur, Gonal-F, baby aspirin and dexamethasone | AFC 8 >> 9R, 4M, 2F w/ ICSI...looking to do PGS testing...Stopped dividing at day 3.
Retested AMH, dropped to undetectable at <.16.
Trying to decide what to do next...
Everyone Welcome
My Blog
 
01-03-2013 at 12:24 PM
dede0726
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That is part of the reason we decided to be open about it with everyone - then they could get the upsdates straight from us and we knew people wouldn't be able to keep their mouths shut! Everyone loves good gossip...

Me - 35 DH - 37 SD - 10
Married 10/8/2011
Started TTC July 2011. Infertility workup July & August 2012.
DH - all clear. Me - Unicornuate Uterus discovered at HSG 8/16/12. Referred for IVF 8/28/12. Approved for IVF Warranty Program 10/2/12. Laparoscopy 11/1/12 - removed right rudamentary horn, both tubes, left ovarian cyst and endometriosis. Given all clear for pregnancy after 1/1/2013.
IVF cycle 1 starts 1/19/13!
12 eggs, 7 mature and all 7 fertilized - 2 Frosties!!
5 day SET 2/4/13 - Beta 2/13: 86 & 2/15: 186 BFP!!!!
EDD: October, 23, 2013
Blog: http://journeyofaplayer.wordpress.com/
 
01-03-2013 at 12:25 PM
asilwhite
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JewelsW1980:
I will add that NO ONE knows we're MFI and they assume that it's a female issue and I'm okay with that.

 

Same here. That is my DH's news to tell if he wants to and he doesn't want to share it so I'm definitely not going to say anything. 


Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
TTC #1 since May 2011 | Me: 28, DH: 28 | DX: MFI
BFP #1 - April 15, 2012 (CP on April 17)
IUIs #1 - #3 (August - October '12) = BFFN
IVF #1.1 (Nov/Dec '12): Cancelled due to 18mm cyst - UGH
IVF #1.2 (Dec/Jan '12/'13): 5dt of 1 "perfect" 1AA blast on 1/26 (2 frosties) = BFP!!!
EDD October 14, 2013
Everyone welcome!
My Blog

Can't wait to meet our little boy!!  BabyFruit Ticker 
01-03-2013 at 1:01 PM
LuClo
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We've gotten progressively more liberal about who knows.  We decided to tell our immediate families after we got referred to a urologist and knew DH would need surgery.  They get the highlights, but nobody knows exact treatment plans until after the fact.  

At work my boss and two close colleagues know; they help cover for me.  The rest of my co-workers are clueless.  Everyone at DH's office knows.

Socially it started out with only two couples that we're really close to knowing.  But again, the longer it goes on, the more people we come out to.  At this point DH breaks the vas surgery out as a drunk bar story for people we hardly know- "My balls were the size of grapefruits!"  "The scars made my nuts look like a giant pause sign!"  Yup, that's how he copes.

The part I struggle with most is straddling the two worlds- half out, half closeted.  It's weird that when we can make it into a joke and tell almost anyone, but there are still some close family and friends that I just can't fathom telling.  Does that makes any sense?


TTC since August 2010
DH diagnosed with Azoospermia in January 2012
Vas reconstruction surgery in April 2012; unsuccessful
IVF with ICSI February 2013; single blastocyst 5dt
First beta March 1 is 147!!!

 
01-03-2013 at 1:23 PM
mkepanther
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My parents don't know about our IF struggle. I am Hmong and don't think my parents would understand this IF stuff. Typically the Hmong have very large families and no problems TTC. I myself come from a family of 8 kids and my older bro has 3 kids and older sis has 4. That being said, if any of my older, ignorant relatives knew they would say the reason was because I married someone who wasn't Hmong.

DH's mom knows. His dad doesn't parents are divorced. My principal does as well and she's been supportive. No one else knows.

TTC #1 since 2008. IUI #1: Clomid+trigger=BFN. IUIs #2-4: Femara+Follistim+trigger=BFNs.
IVF #1, Nov 2012: Bravelle+Menopur. 17R, 12M (all ICSIed), 6F. 5 day transfer of 2 embies=BFN. 2 embies frozen.
FET #1: started BCPs April 2013.

 
01-03-2013 at 2:08 PM
kflynn81
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Pretty much everyone knows but not everyone talks about it. The only people left that haven't a clue (at least as far as I know) are the grandparents.

Anniversary
Me(31): Possibly Adult Growth Hormone Deficiency caused by a mutation in my pituitary genes called PIT-1--Also, Factor V Leiden
DH (31): Borderline low morph, but not considered a problem
"Baby dancing" with no protection or BCP since July 2009
IF testing started March 2011
Endocrinology related tests from October 2011-February 2012
March 2012--Clomid --No response-Straight to injects!
April & May 2012-- IUI#1 & #2 = BFN
July 2012- IVF#1 cancelled
September 2012-IVF#1.2--BFN
November 2012- IVF #2 --BFN
January 2013- IVF #3-- BFFN
February 2013--Found a new RE but first back to the Endocrinologist for more diagnostic testing
Absolutely no idea when we can cycle again...looking into DE as well if IVF#4 fails again
PAIF/SAIF encouraged...give me some hope!!
For detailed cycle info. see right side of blog... Kate's IF Blog
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01-03-2013 at 2:34 PM
rrdiva1
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I am very very open with my life. I try to be respectful since DH and I are in this together, and dealing with MFI, I asked him 1st. All my friends know, mom, sil, Godfather, and now whole world because I outed myself NYE, that I was so glad to have survived  2012 and still be standing with miscarriage,failed fertility cycles, loss of job. It was so dang freeing, and it will avoid people asking dumb ass questions, or making comments. Plus I saw SO many people talking about their pregnancies on FB, all day long with pics, so I wanted to show the flip side of it.

THis is why I share, so many people even in church do not talk about Infertility, like it is a shame or embarrassment, I thought if someone could see my struggle, and that I was still keeping my joy it could bless them.I had people come to me and reach out stating that they were so proud of me, and that my testimony was encouraging.

This 3rd round I will only tell a few people I am cycling, and no one will know beta date, but like 3 people. I hate having to explain when things do not work out. It is nice getting the support though. Hugs to everyone, we are some brave ladies! I am with Jewels, only a few know it is MFI, because they assume my issue, which is fine. I just wanted to raise awareness on FB.

 


Married BF 6/29/2002/ TTC Since Aug 2011/ ME:34 all clear/DH:41 DX Severe MFI/ IVF w/ICSI OCT 2012 Stims started 10/8/ER 10/19/12/ET 10/24/Beta#1 11/2=BFN (beta was 1.2) IVF 2.0-Baseline 11/7/12 beta 0/All Clear Stim start 11/7/12//ER 11/19 11M//10F ET 2 embies 11/24//Beta#1 28 Beta #2 23 Beta#3 29 stop meds Beta#4 37/C/P 5W5D EDD:8/12/13/IVF#3 in Jan Antagonist protacol again Everyone welcome!! My Chart//> Image and video hosting by TinyPic
 
01-03-2013 at 2:51 PM
Carolina B...
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We just recently shared it with my parents and a few very close friends.  It was a relief to share our struggles (and the reason why we've been tight on money and heavy on emotions).  But, now I worry every time I talk to them, they will bring it up.  Sometimes I just don't want to talk about it (considering how much I think about it already).  This is new, so perhaps it will pass.  If not, I'll probably just let them know that I'd prefer to bring it up whenever I want to talk about it.

My TTC Journey:
Dx: Hypothalamic amenorrhea
Progesterone to induce period w/ the goal of Clomid - never got period (September 2011). RE referral.
Femera - never responded to the meds (December 2011)
Clomid with TI - BFN (February 2012)
Injectables (Menopur) - hyperstimulated/canceled (March 2012)
Injectables #2 (Menopur) with TI- BFN (May 2012)
IVF - OHSS (transfer canceled), but 11 frozen! (June 1012)
FET - 1 transferred on 8/09/12. Beta#1 (11dp5dt): 350.3; Beta#2: 365; Beta#3: 157. Biochemical pregnancy.
FET # 2 - 1 transferred on 11/01/12. Beta#1 (11dp5dt): 337; Beta#2: 769. BFP!!! 1st ultrasound 11/28/12 showed heartbeat, but measuring 5 days behind. 2nd ultrasound 12/05/12 - miscarriage.
FET # 3 - 1 transferred on 1/24/13. Beta#1 (11dp5dt): BFN.
FET # 4 - 2 transferred on 3/28/13. Beta #1 (11dp5dt): 673; Beta #2: 1265. Just under 6 weeks - m/c at home. WTF appointment in late May.

 
01-03-2013 at 2:58 PM
katmarso
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I've been pretty open with my family and close friends, my DH mentioned it to his family just before Christmas, but we've shared very few details with them.  

I'm not as annoyed about sharing information or unsolicited advice as I am with people acting like they know how it feels or what I'm going through.  They have no idea.


TTC since 9/2011
Me: DOR (AMH = .3) & blocked rt tube DH: Slightly low morph
1 IUI = BFN
1 Clomid Cycle = BFN
IVF #1 w/ICSI, only 2 viable eggs. 7A & 8A 3dt = BFN

 
01-03-2013 at 3:27 PM
RoadToFert...
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My parents, best friends, and co-workers know about it. All they knew about was IVF # 1, which was a fail. We did not tell anyone abut our FET or give any updates, so as far as they are concerned they think we are simply taking a break from it all. We don't talk about it with pretty much anyone but each other. There is one person at work I confide in about the latest (because she is currently an egg donor and gets what I"m going through) and my SIL who is an RN nurse and can understand my medical terminology. In my opinion, it was too much pressure to tell everyone everything...especially bad news.

Married for 3 years to the love of my life! TTC for over a year. Started seeing RE in April 2012. Lap in July revealed endo covering left ovary and part of my bowels. This will require extensive surgery by a specialist. RE wants us to have babies first because surgery could compromise my ability to carry. Started first round of IVF in August. Ten follies retrieved, eight fertilized, two frosties. IVF #1= C/P *Frozen Embie Transfer scheduled for end of Nov/Dec. Going to transfer 2 frosties if all goes according to plan*
FET # 1 [12/18]: Transferred two "beautiful" embies.
Beta # 1: 126 [BFP!]
Beta # 2: 546
Beta #3: 1618!!
Beta # 4 - 4954!!!!!! Ultrasound 1/18 - Two heartbeats at 121 and 136. Fraternal twins! Um, is this really happening?!
"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped." Psalm 28:7

Our Road to Fertility (My blog)

 Pregnancy Ticker
 
01-03-2013 at 3:28 PM
Scoop77
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It's a delicate balance, for sure, between getting the support you need and making sure that your privacy is protected.

Sometimes I wish we'd told no one but I'm also a very open person, as is DH. We couldn't have kept it a total secret (and I don't know that we would have wanted to) but I do regret telling as many people as we have. It's tiring to get the questions about how things are going, especially when they're not going very well. No one knows how to respond and they often say dumb or weird things. 

I also agree with the PP that even if you tell one person, that one person will definitely tell more people so you might just wind up with the gossip situation anyway. GL!



TTC #1 for about 3.5 years
ME: 37, PCO, immune issues?, teflon uterus (my added diagnosis)
HIM: 38, Perfect. (Showoff.)
Month before starting Clomid, spontaneous pregnancy. m/c at 7 weeks and D&C.
Four months of Clomid, one IUI, with Intralipid each cycle: BFNs all
IVF 1.0 July 2012 -- Lupron, bravelle, menopur, estrogen, progesterone supps, intralipid. 14 ER, 14 fertilized, 1 blast transferred, 2 on ice. BFN
FET 1.1 -- 10/2, transferred our 2 blasts. Lupron, PIO, estrogen, baby aspirin, prednisone. BFN.
IVF 2.0 December 2012 -- Bravelle, Menopur, Ganirelix, Prednisone, Metformin, estrogen, progesterone supps. 22 eggs retrieved on 12/14, 17 mature, 15 fertilized. OHSS anticipated so ET cancelled. 3 embryos frozen.
Broke up with old RE. Moving on to new dude. Maybe the change of scenery will be just the trick for our frosties. On BCPs for possible April FET.

P/SAIF welcome 
01-03-2013 at 3:53 PM
meck716
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Joined on 05-13-2011
857 Points
meck716 is not online. Last active: 04-20-2013, 8:58 PMNewbie

Hm, let's see - my mom and his mom know.  He wanted to tell his mom.  My two closest girlfriends know, but only after I asked DH if it was okay to tell them.  A few people at work know, but they are people I am close to and I really wanted them to know because when absences start piling up, I needed some people to squelch the rumors.  Oh, and my HR director knows because I had to discuss pending absences with him and it was easiest to just be honest.

I sometimes feel like too many people know, but DH and I have been trying for 19 months and many people knew that and we get the questions all the time.  It's not something for us to be embarrassed about - it is what it is and we will make whatever we end up doing work for us.


Married 7-16-10; TTC since July 2011
Me - almost 34; DH - 35
Dx: Unexplained Azoo; all blood work normal (including chromosomal abnormality screens); no blockages; 2 SAs with zero sperm, TESA scheduled for 4/11
Me: HSG, blood work - all clear Fx crossed, praying, and hopeful for a someday Baby E
 
01-03-2013 at 4:51 PM
rrdiva1
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Joined on 08-30-2011
22,035 Points
rrdiva1 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 8:33 AMSilver

mkepanther:
My parents don't know about our IF struggle. I am Hmong and don't think my parents would understand this IF stuff. Typically the Hmong have very large families and no problems TTC. I myself come from a family of 8 kids and my older bro has 3 kids and older sis has 4. That being said, if any of my older, ignorant relatives knew they would say the reason was because I married someone who wasn't Hmong. DH's mom knows. His dad doesn't parents are divorced. My principal does as well and she's been supportive. No one else knows.
I am not going to even lie to you, I had to look up Hmong, yaay for the 15 minute educating goodle search. <3

Don't you love it when family says crazy things like( it is because he is not Hmong) ugh. We got oh you will have no problem because my husband is puerto rican, so they think we should have 20 no promblem. Big hugs <3


Married BF 6/29/2002/ TTC Since Aug 2011/ ME:34 all clear/DH:41 DX Severe MFI/ IVF w/ICSI OCT 2012 Stims started 10/8/ER 10/19/12/ET 10/24/Beta#1 11/2=BFN (beta was 1.2) IVF 2.0-Baseline 11/7/12 beta 0/All Clear Stim start 11/7/12//ER 11/19 11M//10F ET 2 embies 11/24//Beta#1 28 Beta #2 23 Beta#3 29 stop meds Beta#4 37/C/P 5W5D EDD:8/12/13/IVF#3 in Jan Antagonist protacol again Everyone welcome!! My Chart//> Image and video hosting by TinyPic
 
01-03-2013 at 6:48 PM
precious72...
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Joined on 01-07-2008
Jupiter, Florida
6,535 Points
precious72381 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 12:43 PMNewbie
I have always been open about a lot of different struggles and this was no different. I have been able to change people's minds about what they thought they knew. I have also learned how many other people have dealt with this. It stopped the annoying questions about when we are going to start a family. The hardest times were during actual treatments. I kept my first two rounds of Ivf very quiet. People knew we had plans for it, but as a teacher with summers off, I was able to sneak off to doctor appointments easily. This third Ivf was tough, it was after the school year started and I had to take some time off so I told everyone. Of course everyone wanted to know how it went. I shared that I didn't want to talk about it either way for a few weeks just to give me time, of course then I already knew it was successful, but told everyone else we didn't know and don't want to share. I lasted about 2 weeks, finally shared with everyone at 6 weeks and then sadly had to share of the loss at 9 weeks. The support has been nice but you can't stop other people from talking about it when you don't feel like it. It's a double edge sword when people know. I will be keeping more to myself, I hope, from now on. It is nice to have people care or even be curious, but difficult when it is a time you don't want to talk or share.

Me = 31 husband = 35 Married 6/27/2009 TTC since 8/2010 (off BCP since 8/2009)
Unexplained Infertility,I'm a Hemocromotons mild carrier, also have single mild copy of MTHFR
6/2010 FSH 7.2 4/2013 FSH 8.6 AMH 1.4
I have primary lymphedema in my right leg which as far as I know, is not affecting my IF but not many studies out there.
7/2011 Natural cycle with 25mg clomid BFN
8/2011,1/2012,3/2012 IUI #1-3 25-100mg clomid BFN
6/2012 IVF#1 9ER 5 fertilized 2ET ICSI & assisted hatching BFN
8/2012 IVF#2 FET 2ET BFN
11/2012 IVF#3 7ER 5 fertilized naturally!!!! My hubby can fertilize my eggs :) 11/11 2ET 2 of 5 embryos made it to 5dt
11/19/2012 8dp5dt BFP beta 53 p4 7, PIO shots started ,11/21 beta 138 p4 29! 11/26 beta 698 11/29 beta 1942 12/3 beta 6640
12/10/2012 U/S #1 6w4d - One little baby with heartbeat of 124bpm :)edd 8/1/13
12/26/2012 U/S #2 8w6d - No heartbeat,only measured 6 weeks, dx missed miscarriage
12/28/2012 D&C
1/17/2013 Chromosome testing came back as normal male :(
1/19/2013 RPL testing normal
4/3/2013 SIS showed asherman's syndrome caused by D&C (scar tissue)
4/4/2013 Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue
June 2013 IVF planned
5/12/2013 SURPRISE BFP! Natural cycle 12dpo beta 93 progesterone 43 5/20/2013 15 dpo Beta #2 466!!! Progesterone 57 5/22/2013 Beta #3 *****ALL WELCOMED*****
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

 
01-03-2013 at 8:03 PM
chucktgirl
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Joined on 06-01-2006
Michigan
19,963 Points
chucktgirl is not online. Last active: 04-18-2013, 4:43 PMBronze
We told absolutely NO ONE. We really want to protect our privacy, should we not be successful with IVF. I don't want to disappoint our family, and I don't believe that most people can keep other people's secrets. So I don't give anyone the opportunity to share our most personal issues or feel sorry for me. This is comfortable for me. I know that's not the way everyone feels. It also makes me grateful I have bumpies to share with!


My (old) BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com
TTC since Jan 2010 with OPKs. Me: 41, Hypothyroidism, hetero MTHFR C677T, hetero Factor V Leiden (no previous clots) Dx: DOR due to AMA. Rx: 100mg Levothyroxin, FaBB tab, Spring Valley Prenatal Vitamins, Vitamin D. Hubby: 34, Hyperthyroidism, Fragile X carrier, Great swimmers!
Natural PG 9/27/11; MC at 8wks. Used Cytotec to expel: 1/20/12 (unpleasant)
First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12(4cm unknown mass in upper left of uterus) 2nd Saline Sonogram: 10/2/12 (mass disappeared!) IVF injection class: 10/11/12
IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Progesterone- 0.3. 6 follicles in my right ovary & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ in AM. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ in PM. 10/26/12: hCG Trigger IM. ER 10/28/12: 13R, 7M, 6F. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. PGS: All 5 have "severe abnormalities." Devastated. Begged RE for back-to-back IVFs; Started Provera 11/2/12. AF said FU and came anyway, destroying any chance for a Dec IVF. Maxed out lifetime IF meds insurance. I can barely breathe, waiting to get through this process, hoping for my take-home-baby.
IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right ovary & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. 1/16/13: hCG Trigger IM. ER 1/18/13: 9R, 5M, 5F. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. PGS: All embryos have "multiple severe abnormalities." RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the repeated extremely poor quality of my eggs. I don't even know what to do with that.
IVF #3- NEW RE! 100% OOP: 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Progesterone- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right ovary & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ. 3/11/13 ER: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0. 3/16/13 Five day ET: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 Started period a day before beta. BFN.
IVF #4 (FINAL) (Added acupuncture to this cycle.): 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Progesterone- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right ovary & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle & 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ. 4/5/13 ER: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). 4/10/13 Five day ET: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) 4/18/13 Beta: 2.5 BFFN.
No DE or adoption for us, FIRM.
That’s it for us. I am beyond devastated and have no idea how to proceed from here. My life has been forever altered by this experience. Best wishes to all in their journeys! 
01-03-2013 at 9:44 PM
BellaLux
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Joined on 07-24-2008
11,542 Points
BellaLux is not online. Last active: 05-24-2013, 3:40 PMSilver
rrdiva1:

I am very very open with my life. I try to be respectful since DH and I are in this together, and dealing with MFI, I asked him 1st. All my friends know, mom, sil, Godfather, and now whole world because I outed myself NYE, that I was so glad to have survived  2012 and still be standing with miscarriage,failed fertility cycles, loss of job. It was so dang freeing, and it will avoid people asking dumb ass questions, or making comments. Plus I saw SO many people talking about their pregnancies on FB, all day long with pics, so I wanted to show the flip side of it.

THis is why I share, so many people even in church do not talk about Infertility, like it is a shame or embarrassment, I thought if someone could see my struggle, and that I was still keeping my joy it could bless them.I had people come to me and reach out stating that they were so proud of me, and that my testimony was encouraging.

This 3rd round I will only tell a few people I am cycling, and no one will know beta date, but like 3 people. I hate having to explain when things do not work out. It is nice getting the support though. Hugs to everyone, we are some brave ladies! I am with Jewels, only a few know it is MFI, because they assume my issue, which is fine. I just wanted to raise awareness on FB.

Bless you:-)


~TTC#1 Since July 2011~
Dx: 10/10 - Fibroids; 6/12 - Tubal Infertility
9/12 -IVF w/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol)=BFFN
Next: Feb 2013 -Myomectomy
S/PAIF Welcome
Daisypath Anniversary tickers  
01-03-2013 at 11:57 PM
wisp1422
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Joined on 11-30-2012
876 Points
wisp1422 is not online. Last active: 02-07-2013, 11:43 PMNewbie

 Sorry your sister is so rude and doesn't understand your struggles =(

Were starting to talk about our TTC issues, I started bugging DH for a baby a year after we were married (11 Years ago). And when it didn't happen naturally and I was diagnosed with PCOS I just kept it to myself. I tried to be happy for friends who were having kids but it was hard. We finally got better insurance that allowed us to see a REI and since July 2011. My Mom knows we have had issues as she is also my boss so she knows when I see the doctor and has asked questions about the problems I have. She helps us as our insurance only covers 50% of the cost which is a big help. Beyond that Mother in Law knows because she lives with us and asks how the appointments go but tries to give advice which I wish she wouldn't like reminding me after each US that her sister was on Clomid for 13 months before she had her daughter 26 years ago. DH's sister is just down right rude and doesn't understand because she told me "Time to see the doctor then I guess" and "you guys can have mom live with you since you don't have kids". She poped out 4 kids so one after another and doesn't understand infertility even though most of her friends had such a hard time to conceive one child. Generally we don't say much especially after my Brother got all butt hurt because I didn't want to do my Trigger shot on the side of the road in some bathroom on Christmas Eve and take the chance of throwing away $200 that we spent on the shot if something happened to it. One of my friends I have known for 27 years I've started to tell her a little as she is due with her second baby and is sympathetic. 


Me: 31 DH: 33 Married : 12 Years going on 16 years together TTC since 9/2001 11/2012 100 MG Clomid 12/2012 200 MG Clomid: IUI 12/26 2 Week Wait Praying for a miracle 
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