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01-08-2013 at 7:10 AM

candlequee...

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alcohol at shower?

One of my co-workers is throwing me a work shower in late march or early april and she is already planning everything. She TOLD me not asked me..."There will be alcohol at this shower, just to let you know." With sort of an attitude (not sure how to describe it by typing). I was wondering if this is becoming the norm? I went to a baby shower last year and it was at like 11 am and we had mimosas, but nothing heavy. I just don't want everyone drunk and we have quite a few co-workers that aren't 21. What do you think?

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01-08-2013 at 7:41 AM

EastCoastB...

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I've been to showers where there was alcohol. I threw one, actually. To me, it's like any other social function. Alcohol is available for those who want it (and can legally drink). Is it the norm in your circle that if alcohol is there, i'ts a given that "everyone" will get drunk?

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01-08-2013 at 7:41 AM

kimmarie11...

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Every single show I have ever been to has had at a minimum, champagne punch or mimosa's. I don't understand what the big deal is. Do you work with a bunch of alcoholics who cant have a couple without getting trashed?

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01-08-2013 at 7:58 AM

MelRC117

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There was an open bar at my shower and we had it lunch time. My hostess figured people would want a bloody mary or wine or something.

You can have alcohol but not have people get trashed. I would expect that people would be adults about it and have one or two drinks, not twelve and start doing shots.

Edited for clarity because I can't form complete sentences apparently.

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01-08-2013 at 7:59 AM

Jezebell26

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Mine includes unlimited beer, wine and soda.

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01-08-2013 at 8:12 AM

candlequee...

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I don't mind alcohol at the shower at all, however, I am worried about the people that are not 21. There are 5 girls that are not yet 21 and one of them is a partyer. Alcohol isn't the issue (I drank mimosas at the shower I went to last year), its the people. I'm not going to voice my concern or anything, we'll just see how it goes. She didn't say what type of drink...so maybe it'll be just wine or champagne.

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01-08-2013 at 8:19 AM

morethanco...

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I can't recall a shower I've been to that hasn't had alcohol.

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01-08-2013 at 8:31 AM

Joy2611

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candlequeen:
I don't mind alcohol at the shower at all, however, I am worried about the people that are not 21. There are 5 girls that are not yet 21 and one of them is a partyer. Alcohol isn't the issue (I drank mimosas at the shower I went to last year), its the people. I'm not going to voice my concern or anything, we'll just see how it goes. She didn't say what type of drink...so maybe it'll be just wine or champagne.

We often have work parties that include champagne and wine. I work in an academic lab where we celebrate dissertation defenses and our research building hosts lectures with late afternoon wine. The Christmas party which is in the building and starts at 2pm even has open bar. We range in age from 18 to 60+. I've never seen a drunk underager there. Ever.

Give them the benefit of the doubt. Even the college kids I work with have enough sense to not get smashed at a work-related party.

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01-08-2013 at 8:34 AM

Estwd2

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candlequeen:
I don't mind alcohol at the shower at all, however, I am worried about the people that are not 21. There are 5 girls that are not yet 21 and one of them is a partyer.

Where is the shower being held? Unless it's at someone's house or a BYOB restaurant, I can't imagine this would be a problem. Also, if one or two under-21 girls get drunk and act a fool, they look bad, not you. They're adults now and should act like it. If they want to look like idiots in front of their coworkers, then they need to live with the consequences. No need to take alcohol away from responsible adults on the off chance some girls might get stupid.

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01-08-2013 at 8:36 AM

Adam&Eve2

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It's not uncommon and depends on the MTB and who is throwing the shower. If you do have a lot of underage people coming you might want to bring that up to your hostess. But she is the one who gets to make the final decision.

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01-08-2013 at 8:49 AM

BeckyTheEn...

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I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

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01-08-2013 at 9:00 AM

526SadieSa...

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All of the showers I've been to had alcohol of some kind provided, or they were in a restaurant where you could order a drink if you wanted to. I don't see the big deal at all.

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01-08-2013 at 9:02 AM

Adam&Eve2

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BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

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01-08-2013 at 9:10 AM

wittyschaf...

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I don't think that alcohol at a shower is a big deal either. Just because I can't drink doesn't mean everyone else can't too. When I threw my sister's baby shower, we had mimosas and a bloody mary bar. If people didn't want the champagne or the vodka, no biggie. We made them virgin ones. We also had water and coffee too so people had choices, including the mom to be.

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01-08-2013 at 9:11 AM

candlequee...

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thanks everyone! I think I'll just ask the girl hosting the shower what type she'll be serving and where we'll be having it. I know its her decision and hopefully everyone will conduct themselves as adults esp. since our bosses will be there.

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01-08-2013 at 9:46 AM

Mmm79

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I personally see nothing wrong with it and while it's certainly not a requirement, I think that adult refreshments served at an adult gathering are quite appropriate. I would say it's been about 60/40 in favor of having alcohol at the baby showers I have attended. It depends on the time of day, but it's typically mimosas, bloody mary's and/or wine. My sister is throwing my shower and when she and I discussed it, we both agreed that there should be alcohol for the non-pregnant folks.

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01-08-2013 at 9:47 AM

Cranang

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BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality. What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip? What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets? It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant. If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking. If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.

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01-08-2013 at 10:09 AM

ggatlanta

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Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality. What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip? What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets? It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant. If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking. If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.

I'm with Cranang.

I still don't get why the OP thought having alcohol at a shower was weird? Unless your shower is in something like the McDonough Church of God fellowship room, alcohol's a given...

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01-08-2013 at 10:12 AM

Bliss+Berr...

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Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality.  What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip?  What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets?  It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant.  If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking.  If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.

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01-08-2013 at 10:19 AM

EastCoastB...

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Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality. What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip? What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets? It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant. If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking. If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.

Dude, for real! I don't get what it is about alcohol that pregnant women suddenly need to use it as a weird control thing - "If I can't have it, no one can!". For all the examples you listed here, and more!

"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~Benjamin Franklin

DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10

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01-08-2013 at 10:33 AM

Helenahhan...

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Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality. What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip? What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets? It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant. If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking. If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.

Agree 100%

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01-08-2013 at 10:44 AM

candlequee...

Joined on 09-28-2009

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ggatlanta:
Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality. What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip? What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets? It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant. If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking. If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.
I'm with Cranang.
I still don't get why the OP thought having alcohol at a shower was weird? Unless your shower is in something like the McDonough Church of God fellowship room, alcohol's a given...

sorry but I never said it was weird...you should go back to the original post and read it.

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01-08-2013 at 10:49 AM

Bliss+Berr...

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candlequeen:
ggatlanta:
Cranang:
BeckyTheEngineer:
I personally think it is weird and rude to have alcohol at a party, when the guest of honor would not drink. But, all I have actually seen at showers is punch, made with a tiny bit of champagne. I would think that it is a stretch to think anyone would get drunk.

I seriously hate this mentality.  What if the guest of honor had an aversion to chips and dip?  What if the guest of honor didn't like sweets?  It's a party for the guests to enjoy themselves at, since they're spending money to come to it.

But, I also don't understand men who stop having drinks when their wives are pregnant.  If I break my ankle and I can't walk, I don't expect my husband to stop walking.  If I have a root canal and I can't chew solids, I don't expect my husband to stop eating foods that have to be chewed.
I'm with Cranang.
I still don't get why the OP thought having alcohol at a shower was weird? Unless your shower is in something like the McDonough Church of God fellowship room, alcohol's a given...
sorry but I never said it was weird...you should go back to the original post and read it.

Your question as to whether it was becoming the norm implies that you don't think it is. Not normal equals weird.

Edited for clarity iPhone

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01-08-2013 at 10:55 AM

EastCoastB...

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Bliss+Berry:
Your question as to whether it was becoming the norm implies that you don't think it is. Not normal equals weird. Edited for clarity iPhone

Yeah - you may not have used the word 'weird', but your OP does read as if you think it's weird. That may not be what you meant, but it is how it reads.

"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
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01-08-2013 at 10:58 AM

jahjbmr

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I would think it was a bit weird but wouldn't mind. I just have never once been to a shower of any kind that had alcohol.

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01-08-2013 at 11:10 AM

discobelle

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I don't think it's a big deal to have alcohol at an event where's there's underage people present. Just don't serve the kids.

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01-08-2013 at 11:21 AM

Holloia

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Every shower I have been to has alcohol. My guess is your host is not serving shots of Jack Daniels so I think there should not be any issue. Also, if I went to a shower with no champagne or sangria I would be kind of annoyed. Not that I'm a raging alki but it is nice to have the option (only when I'm not knocked up of course). I guess I just really like sangria though. Oh and I agree with PP that just because the mother cannot drink doesn't mean nobody else can.

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01-08-2013 at 11:21 AM

BeckyTheEn...

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My husband still drinks all if the time, and I don't mind at all. However, if the whole point of an event is to be a party for me, I think that should be a bigger consideration. In general, parties in my family never have alcohol, so in my circle it is a non issue.

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01-08-2013 at 11:30 AM

Bliss+Berr...

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BeckyTheEngineer:
My husband still drinks all if the time, and I don't mind at all. However, if the whole point of an event is to be a party for me, I think that should be a bigger consideration. In general, parties in my family never have alcohol, so in my circle it is a non issue.

If that's your reasoning, it's completely selfish. If one person can't drink, that no one else be allowed to? These people are giving up a day in their weekend and bringing you a gift. It's a celebration for crying out loud.

It's completely different if no one in your circle drinks.

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01-08-2013 at 11:34 AM

BabyMayinM...

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Ive never even heard of serving alcohol at a baby shower. But most friends I have aren't really drinkers. But I wouldn't side eye a shower with alcohol. Why not have a glass of wine or mimosa while sitting for hours playing games and watching the MTB open gifts?

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