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01-08-2013 at 10:16 PM
PaminNB
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Joined on 05-26-2008
New Brunswick, Canada
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PaminNB is not online. Last active: 04-24-2013, 12:40 AMNewbie

Question

How many of you would have a problem with you child being in a car that is smoked in regularly, although not when they are in the car?  Am I being completely ridiculous saying that my kids can't drive around with MIL?  Also, how would you tell her (since my husband said he won't do it)?

Thanks for any advice...
 
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01-08-2013 at 10:44 PM
andrea.ber...
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andrea.berg07 is not online. Last active: 05-18-2013, 10:33 PMNewbie

I would NOT and DO NOT allow it! You are being a MOM who is smart :)

I would just tell her straight up its for your child's health that they cant ride in her vehicle, its still second hand smoke in my mind. 
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01-08-2013 at 11:42 PM
laxkal23
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laxkal23 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 3:20 AMBronze

Once in awhile for a short 5 min ride maybe, but most likely no. I had my whole family change Xmas location this year because I didn't want CJ going to my aunts and uncles house who smoke inside. Even though they assured me they would not smoke in front of him I know that whenever we go there I always leave with a sore throat and feeling ill I would not want to expose my child to that. Smoke residue is just as harmful as smoke itself so I think you are being very reasonable. Maybe try looking up some info on hazards of smoke residue  (I want to say its called 3rd hand smoke) and bring it too her attention when you address the issue.
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01-09-2013 at 12:24 AM
abbp23
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abbp23 is not online. Last active: 05-23-2013, 1:59 AMNewbie

I would and have said no. 3rd hand smoke is just as dangerous and lingers in the fabric. I gave my husband the ultimatum of either quitting before LO arrived or moving out even though he only smoked outside. I also made him steam clean all of the fabric in his car. 

If you are even remotely uncomfortable with something then don't worry about upsetting people. All that matters is your baby's health! If DH won't side with you and back you up then that's an even bigger problem than the smoking MIL. Good luck!
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01-09-2013 at 2:17 AM
Kimbus22
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Kimbus22 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 11:22 AMGold

I wouldn't let my kid be driven around in a car that's smoked in now. I certainly wouldn't have done it when he was a brand new baby.

I'd probably cop out and tell MIL that the pediatrician told you the baby can't be in the car due to the third hand smoke being bad for LOs' health.

Then I'd tell my DH to grow a pair and that his kid's health is more important than his mother's feelings.

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01-09-2013 at 6:32 AM
danak4
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danak4 is not online. Last active: 05-25-2013, 8:41 AMBronze

I think it depends. Is your MIL driving your kid everyday or once a month? Is she smoking with the car seat in the car? I might not approve of a cross country road trip, but an occasional ride with grandma would probably be just fine.  If she smokes in her house are your children not allowed to visit grandma? Sometimes I think we over think things as parents. 

Also I think DH should always deal with confrontation with MIL. She's likely to be more forgiving with him than with you. 
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