not sure there's a way to avoid it all together but you can find ways to help unwind...go take a bath with bubbles and make a yummy drink for yourself (mint tea, cranberry and soda water etc...) do you like playing stupid computer games or iphone games? or read?
if DH needs time alone i guess it's hard to make him feel guilty about it but i'm with you on that one - sometimes you just want him around!
maybe he can give you a massage tomorrow night after work instead.