My husband isn't an expert in birth, nor does he want to be, so we hired a doula last time. We'll get her again this time.
Coaching is not about giving commands. It's about giving support. I had back labour last time and needed hip compressions every contraction for about 5 hours. DH did a bunch, the doula did a bunch. They helped me a ton. Less critical if you just want an epidural, but I wanted to go (and did) med-free.
Making your birth plan this early in your first pregnancy is very ambitious, but I doubt you really know what you want yet. Your feelings will evolve over the next few months as you grow a baby and learn about what birth really entails.
I totally disagree about the birth plan being a set-up for failure, though, and get tired of being told to just expect nothing and do what the nurse says. Ew. No one held my legs or told me how to push.