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01-10-2013 at 8:40 AM
jjetweddin...
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Joined on 01-26-2003
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jjetwedding is not online. Last active: 05-03-2013, 8:14 AMNewbie

Baby girls

I have a little baby girl and I was wondering if everyone else with a baby girl or boy really is hyper protective and aware that they could be abused. My dad who is the most loving grandpa wants to nap with her in his arms which is fine but I have to stay in the room he is in. I don't trust anyone alone with my baby. I think it stems from the fact that I know way too many friends who have told me in secrecy that they were molested by a family member, neighbor. What are your thoughts? I don't think sleepovers anywhere will be happening, is this totally paranoid of me?
 
01-10-2013 at 8:46 AM
kerbear135
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kerbear135 is not online. Last active: 05-20-2013, 7:48 PMBronze
While I understand where your fears are stemming from, I do think you're being paranoid.  You were raised by your father, yes? If so, and you never felt uncomfortable being alone with him, then your daughter should be fine. It's hard to trust other people with our babies, but you can't lock her in an ivory tower until she's an adult...

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01-10-2013 at 8:48 AM
angielayne...
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angielayne926 is not online. Last active: 05-21-2013, 6:25 AMSilver
While I think you need to be very careful with who you let your child be around, I think you are being a little too overprotective.

I think you need to be aware of signs that someone is an abuser...constantly wants to be alone with a child, talks inappropriately when joking around, only surrounds themselves with children, etc.

I don't think your dad wanting to have your daughter nap on him is something to be worried about, but I'm obviously not there to see him around children.

I think bottom line, you just need to be aware of your surroundings, but don't overdo it.


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01-10-2013 at 9:14 AM
mabenner1
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mabenner1 is not online. Last active: 05-21-2013, 5:22 AMGold
I think you are being very paranoid and hypervigilant. Unless your dad molested your or someone else, you have no reason not to trust him. I think you need to talk to a doctor about this, honestly. That level of anxiety is not normal.

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01-10-2013 at 9:29 AM
cerratocc
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cerratocc is not online. Last active: 05-19-2013, 10:06 PMBronze

mabenner1:
I think you are being very paranoid and hypervigilant. Unless your dad molested your or someone else, you have no reason not to trust him. I think you need to talk to a doctor about this, honestly. That level of anxiety is not normal.

 

Exactly this. 


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01-10-2013 at 12:13 PM
KaPete08
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KaPete08 is not online. Last active: 05-20-2013, 10:09 PMNewbie

I think you are a little paranoid about your Dad maybe, unless you feel uncomfortable around him for some reason. But, honestly, I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I have a 3 year old son and it never crossed my mind that anything bad would ever happen to him. As soon as my daughter was born it was like I had to protect both of them from the world. I have never been abused or even so much as mistreated by anyone, family or not and I still think about it.

My sister has a 14 year old boy and a 15 year old girl and she has said the same thing. She will allow her son to ride his bike all over town and not think twice about it but, her daughter can't even walk to a friends house 2 blocks over without going in a group of girls.  

I think constant exposure to real life news(internet, TV, Facebook...) has made me, and maybe others, hyperaware of what COULD happen and worry that it WILL happen to me or someone I love.

 
01-11-2013 at 4:10 AM
Kimbus22
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Kimbus22 is not online. Last active: 05-21-2013, 7:12 AMGold

mabenner1:
I think you are being very paranoid and hypervigilant. Unless your dad molested your or someone else, you have no reason not to trust him. I think you need to talk to a doctor about this, honestly. That level of anxiety is not normal.

This.  Fear is normal. But fear that prevents you from letting even trusted family members near your child is not.  You need some help.  You could have post partum anxiety. I did and it did a number on me until I got into therapy.  Good luck.


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