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01-14-2013 at 7:39 PM
Jessegirl1...
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Not buying off the registry

Hey all,

I have a shower to attend on the weekend and have discovered all the gifts on the registry in the price range i would spend are have already been bought. Should I get a bunch of small random things off the registry or something she didnt register for that i found really helpful when i had my baby? Which would you prefer if it was your shower?

thanks!! 
 
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01-14-2013 at 7:44 PM
BeckyTheEn...
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Personally, I'd probably prefer the off registry item. I was making it up as I went along back when I registered, and didn't really have a clue what I would really need. A lot of my favorite and most used gifts were things I never thought to register for.
 
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01-14-2013 at 7:50 PM
mrshall102...
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It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card?  You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it.  Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards. 
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01-14-2013 at 7:54 PM
RockyR12
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mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card?  You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it.  Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards. 

I second the gift card idea.  It might be nice to have it to put towards more expensive items that aren't purchased. 
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01-14-2013 at 8:14 PM
RoxyLynn
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Choose a gift from your experience or get some small items - either is great.  Gift cards are no fun to watch people open, even if they are useful.
I think it can be done well, and I would have loved it, but taking all of the crappy parts of school away from a kid isn't good for them in the long run.

There are lessons like "Not everyone likes you" and "Some people are douche bags" that you don't learn without socializing in a large group of poorly supervised children.
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01-14-2013 at 8:15 PM
Jillwithan...
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Going off the registry is awesome, but not necessary. As PPs said you could get a gift card or maybe see if you know anyone else invited that would go on in a bigger gift together? 
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01-14-2013 at 8:16 PM
JaynieByrd
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Maybe you can supplement one of the smaller registry item(s) with something on her registry that she might like extras of, like diapers or wipes? 
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01-14-2013 at 8:33 PM
a13049
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I think either is fine. You could do a combo, purchase a smaller item or two from her registry then pick something out that was useful for you or an outfit. Or pick out a small item or two then add a gift card. I know people love to get the cutesy stuff, but picking up some of the not so glamorous small items off the registry then adding a cute outfit or toy can really help out the new mom.  
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01-14-2013 at 8:47 PM
rhubarb123
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Jillwithani:
Going off the registry is awesome, but not necessary. As PPs said you could get a gift card or maybe see if you know anyone else invited that would go on in a bigger gift together? 

This.  I most likely would give a gift card instead of something I pesonally found helpful with baby.  The reason I say that is because maybe it wasn't on her registry because she already has it or someone has given her one.
 
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01-14-2013 at 8:51 PM
cinderin
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I would buy a couple smaller things up to the amount you are looking to spend. 

Or a cute outfit and a gift card to wherever she is registered to get to your total.  
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01-14-2013 at 8:55 PM
SunAndRain
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There was not a single off-registry gift that I received that I don't cherish or was not incredibly useful.  Of course I had the basics covered, but my mom friends know about all the little things that made life SO much easier.

I say go with something you found useful!
 
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01-14-2013 at 9:24 PM
MsAmeera25
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I think if you are going to go off the registry just include a gift receipt just in case she already has the item. There is a lot of items that weren't on my registry because we had 2 work showers between my husband and ,I ppl bought a lot of useful things but I still ended up getting 3 diaper genies and wipe warmers etc Include a gift receipt and you should be fine.
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01-14-2013 at 9:45 PM
discobelle
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BeckyTheEngineer:
Personally, I'd probably prefer the off registry item. I was making it up as I went along back when I registered, and didn't really have a clue what I would really need. A lot of my favorite and most used gifts were things I never thought to register for.

I agree.  I had friends who were experienced Moms who gave me some of their favorite things.  They ended up being some of my most useful gifts.
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01-14-2013 at 9:52 PM
wittyschaf...
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Another vote for "useful" item - with a gift receipt.  That way, if the MTB already has it, she can return it for something else.
 
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01-14-2013 at 10:22 PM
Crispity
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discobelle:

BeckyTheEngineer:
Personally, I'd probably prefer the off registry item. I was making it up as I went along back when I registered, and didn't really have a clue what I would really need. A lot of my favorite and most used gifts were things I never thought to register for.

I agree.  I had friends who were experienced Moms who gave me some of their favorite things.  They ended up being some of my most useful gifts.

This! I had no clue what I needed when I was registering. It was great to get things that my friends had found useful. 

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01-14-2013 at 10:49 PM
Spacebunny...
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I would, if I was the recipient, prefer the random little things on the registry vs. something not on there, no matter how much the giver found it was useful.  It's possible she didn't register for it for a reason (has it, doesn't like whatever it is, etc.) and here there are items left on the registry, so if you don't get those items, odds are she'll spend the $ to go get them herself.

My suggestion would be to get a cute basket or other container, and fill it with those random little things.  I know I'd love something like that.   
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01-14-2013 at 10:55 PM
BakerMommy
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I'd go with something you found useful [and maybe even include why you like it] with a gift receipt. Can't go wrong!
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01-15-2013 at 1:08 AM
eav2c
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Either or. I sincerely appreciated the gifts that weren't on my registry and ended up using them more than things that were.
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01-15-2013 at 8:46 AM
mabjcb19
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I'd go with a bunch of little things that a new Mom will go through a lot of, nooks, socks, bibs, lotion, soap.  If they don't seem like enough add a giftcard.  If I go with a bunch of little things I try to find a small basket to put everything in and decorate it to jazz it up. 
 
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01-15-2013 at 8:50 AM
caladpi02
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This happened to me for a friend's shower. I bought her clothes for the 9 to 12 month and 6 to 9 month range. I generally buy clothes for this timeframe if I can't find a registry item or if what I get needs to be beefed up. 9 months seems to be a timeframe for which new moms need clothes.
I know people are suggesting diapers and wipes, but I have never seen those items on a registry or given at a shower.
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01-15-2013 at 8:59 AM
Adam&Eve2
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I would get the off registry gift. The registry is just a suggestion not be all end all. And after I had DD I found some things really useful and others just a waste of money.

If I get invited to a shower I always check the registry but will usually buy them something I know will be useful/make life easier.



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01-15-2013 at 9:24 AM
hocus
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I'd either do a gift basket of small items or something returnable. When I had to buy a off registry because the entire registry was sold out  I got something from baby gap with a gift receipt.
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01-15-2013 at 11:01 AM
MrsMuq
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I think the GC idea is your best option - you spend what you're comfortable with, and the new mom can put it towards an items not purchased.

Otherwise, something I've done in the past, if I don't see an item on the registry that is one of my own "must-haves" I buy it and include a small note as to why said item was enjoyed by my own DS/made our lives easier/ made something more convenient, etc. I generally refer to this as an "Andrew-approved" item... LOL.
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01-15-2013 at 11:01 AM
ChevyFam71...
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Did she register for baby medicines? A lot of people forget this... baby orajel, baby motrin, gas releif, boogey wipes, first aid kit, benadryl, suncreen etc. Useful items that people don't think to register for and can be put in a cute basket or something...

If you get something you love make sure you include a gift receipt in case she already has it or someone else get it too...

Gift cards are SO nice in case there is a big item they need that they don't receive (or if they maybe didn't register for them out of preference - - like a pump). Maybe get a small gift to open in conjunction with a gift card??
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01-15-2013 at 12:13 PM
stephweins...
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mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card?  You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it.  Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards. 

This.  I would prefer a gift card from the store where I registered.  IMHO, if I were the recipient and I wanted what you're thinking of buying I would have registered for it.  At the very least buy the thing you think may be helpful but get it from the store she registered from so she can return it with ease.
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01-15-2013 at 1:43 PM
526SadieSa...
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You could do small, random things in a basket or maybe a gift certificate for a prenatal massage?  I got one at my shower and it was pretty fantastic.

If you had a little more time I'd say go look on Etsy and have something made but that won't work if the shower is this weekend.
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01-15-2013 at 2:22 PM
tilsonc
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Buy size 1 diapers and wipes. I loved getting diapers and wipes at my shower!!
 
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01-15-2013 at 2:40 PM
Happy2BPre...
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mrshall10210:
It's not a lot of fun, but maybe just get her a gift card?  You could get one of the small things and a nice card to put with it.  Surely there'll be something she didn't get that she could put the money towards. 

This!

Or, is there someone you could go in with to buy a bigger item?  

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01-15-2013 at 6:35 PM
kellyrn995...
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I personally would prefer the small things off my registry. I registered for them for a reason and would much prefer that to an outfit. One of my favorite shower gifts to give is a basket of small but wanted items. Although gift cards are great for the recipient you very rarely see them given at showers. 

 
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01-15-2013 at 8:48 PM
CloudBee
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kellyrn9956:

I personally would prefer the small things off my registry. I registered for them for a reason and would much prefer that to an outfit. One of my favorite shower gifts to give is a basket of small but wanted items. Although gift cards are great for the recipient you very rarely see them given at showers. 

 

Agreed.  She spent time picking out and/or researching all of those small items.  I loved receiving a bunch of the small items from my registry at my bridal shower.

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