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01-15-2013 at 7:28 PM
alixap
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Gift Opening @ Baby Shower

I'm planning a baby shower for my sister and have been toying around with the idea of doing a less structured gift opening process. I've only been to one baby shower before, and it was your typical, eat appetizers, guess the melted candy in the diaper, pin the sperm on the egg, then watch mom open a mound of presents for 45 minutes. It seemed like everyone's attention waned pretty easily throughout the shower.  

I was thinking of doing something where my sister could relax in a nice comfy chair or couch, and as people arrive they can sit and have a more intimate conversation with her while she opens their gift face to face. Meanwhile everyone else can relax, eat, drink, play optional games, etc. 

I figure it's a good way to make sure she can say hello to everyone without having to run around. 

Is there a way to do this without running into problems? Has anyone tried this or have experience? If so, how did it go?

 

Thank you in advance! 

 
01-15-2013 at 7:30 PM
jeffsjayme
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What about people who bring a group gift? Or a small gift?  Or not a gift at all?

Seems like a way to unintentionally embarass someone. 


 
01-15-2013 at 7:39 PM
Estwd2
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This has come up here before and I'm not a fan. Think of the logistics. What happens when multiple people come in at once? Do they form a line? Hold their gift while going to mingle? Drop it off by her, then come back to greet her later? Yeah, I'm just not a fan.

Also, please don't think that candy in the diaper and pin the sperm on the egg are typical. That's just weird.

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01-15-2013 at 7:47 PM
BeckyTheEn...
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I think you described a not exactly typical or ideal shower. I don't know how many guests you have, but 45 minutes sounds long and boring. You can stick with the traditional everyone watches her open, but help her move things along so it takes half as long. Also, there are games like bingo and setting a stopwatch during gift opening to give out more prizes and make it more interesting.
 
01-15-2013 at 7:54 PM
Pumpkin_Pr...
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jeffsjayme:

What about people who bring a group gift? Or a small gift?  Or not a gift at all?

Seems like a way to unintentionally embarass someone. 

I agree with this. Also, the shower might drag out for a lot longer than expected if your sister is going to sit and have a personal conversation about every gift. Of course she will be greeting everyone anyway, but if it turns into even a 5 minute conversation with each of only 20 guests, that's an hour and a half of everyone else having to entertain themselves. I would find that pretty boring. Maybe I'm a little strange, but I really like watching the MTB open gifts and seeing what everyone else brought. 

I prefer the idea of playing a game, like baby shower bingo, during the gift opening to keep people entertained. 


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01-15-2013 at 7:58 PM
mabenner1
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I think it would take forever.

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01-15-2013 at 8:05 PM
alixap
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alixap is not online. Last active: 01-16-2013, 3:57 PMNewbie

Hmm, darn. I thought that was a good idea. It'll probably be around 20 or so people at the shower. 

I imagine it more as, when you walk in you can put your gift down on a table near my sister, get something to eat or drink, sit and talk with her (I have a really big open floor plan and I was going to arrange some of the furniture in a circle), guests don't HAVE to have a gift in their hands to sit with the mom-to-be and they wouldn't have to immediately go up to her and stand in line to say hello...so I don't see how it would unintentionally embarrass someone who didn't bring something any more than the traditional mass opening would. She's just a really laid back person and I know she felt really uncomfortable having all eyes on her at her bridal shower so I was trying to think of a way to make her less anxious while she opens gifts. 

...but maybe I will have to do something more traditional to keep the guests happy as well. Thanks again for the input. 

 
01-15-2013 at 8:13 PM
Pumpkin_Pr...
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alixap:

Hmm, darn. I thought that was a good idea. It'll probably be around 20 or so people at the shower. 

I imagine it more as, when you walk in you can put your gift down on a table near my sister, get something to eat or drink, sit and talk with her (I have a really big open floor plan and I was going to arrange some of the furniture in a circle), guests don't HAVE to have a gift in their hands to sit with the mom-to-be and they wouldn't have to immediately go up to her and stand in line to say hello...so I don't see how it would unintentionally embarrass someone who didn't bring something any more than the traditional mass opening would. She's just a really laid back person and I know she felt really uncomfortable having all eyes on her at her bridal shower so I was trying to think of a way to make her less anxious while she opens gifts. 

...but maybe I will have to do something more traditional to keep the guests happy as well. Thanks again for the input. 

Because in your initial post you said that the guest would sit and talk with the MTB while she opened their gift, not set it on a table near her, so if someone didn't bring one they might feel embarrassed. 


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01-15-2013 at 8:18 PM
cinderin
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alixap:

Hmm, darn. I thought that was a good idea. It'll probably be around 20 or so people at the shower. 

I imagine it more as, when you walk in you can put your gift down on a table near my sister, get something to eat or drink, sit and talk with her (I have a really big open floor plan and I was going to arrange some of the furniture in a circle), guests don't HAVE to have a gift in their hands to sit with the mom-to-be and they wouldn't have to immediately go up to her and stand in line to say hello...so I don't see how it would unintentionally embarrass someone who didn't bring something any more than the traditional mass opening would. She's just a really laid back person and I know she felt really uncomfortable having all eyes on her at her bridal shower so I was trying to think of a way to make her less anxious while she opens gifts. 

...but maybe I will have to do something more traditional to keep the guests happy as well. Thanks again for the input. 

I am also the type who doesn't relish having everyone watch me open gifts. I would guess most people don't like to do it. Probably the minority like it.

But as the honored guest, you suck it up.

I didn't enjoy it at my bridal shower (9 years ago) and I am not looking forward to it if/when I have a baby shower.

But you suck it up and do what you have to do as the honored guest.

Luckily, the most you will have to do this is a couple times. Shower for first wedding, shower for first time mom.

So, as the honored guest, you suck it up. I would be disappointed to come to a shower and not see the gifts opened.


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01-15-2013 at 8:49 PM
shoptilyou...
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I have a great game idea for you if you want. It has to do with clues that relate to baby, and the answer is a candy bar...for instance: 

Clue: What would you call a lullaby?

Answer: Symphony (it's a chocolate bar)

The winning answer wins that candy bar. I've done it twice, and people have a blast yelling out the answers. It's also great for co-ed parties. I can send you the full list of clues/answers, if you're interested.  

Regarding the gift opening, we did a BINGO game at my shower. All the guests were given a blank game board when they came. They filled out the board based on what gifts they thought I would get. They filled it out while they mingled and ate food. Later, as I opened the gifts, it was so awesome to see how interested they were in every package!!!! If I got something that was on their board, like a rattle, they crossed it off. Keep going until someone gets a BINGO. They gave out Starbucks cards to the winners. I think we played up to 5 winners. That will definitely keep guests interested in gifts!!!!

 
01-15-2013 at 9:12 PM
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I've hosted a lot of events/showers and I've found that the easiest thing to do is let everyone come in and chat and mingle for a few minutes. When most or all of the guests have arrived, we serve the appetizers/brunch (with the guest of honor being served/seated first). She is nearly done eating by the time everyone else is sitting, so she starts opening presents while everyone is enjoying their food.

One hostess collects the plates and waits for a few minutes, then starts cutting and passing out the cake (if there are a lot of gifts - at the last baby shower I hosted, there were about 35 gifts, all with multiple things in the bags and boxes, so this took a while to open) and the hostess would also pass out juice or coffee.

As soon as the new mom is done with the gifts, she enjoys her cake and sits and visits with those who wish to stay, while the people who need to leave can head out. Myself or one of the other hostesses will refresh coffee and drinks and offer more cake, letting people know (without telling them) that they are welcome to sit and visit.

It should be noted that we don't do games at any showers I've hosted - all of the brides or moms-to-be considered them to be juvenile, so I never included them. I always let that be up to the guest of honor, but I haven't had one choose to include any type of game yet. 


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01-15-2013 at 9:21 PM
Stina2012
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+ASH+:

I've hosted a lot of events/showers and I've found that the easiest thing to do is let everyone come in and chat and mingle for a few minutes. When most or all of the guests have arrived, we serve the appetizers/brunch (with the guest of honor being served/seated first). She is nearly done eating by the time everyone else is sitting, so she starts opening presents while everyone is enjoying their food.

One hostess collects the plates and waits for a few minutes, then starts cutting and passing out the cake (if there are a lot of gifts - at the last baby shower I hosted, there were about 35 gifts, all with multiple things in the bags and boxes, so this took a while to open) and the hostess would also pass out juice or coffee.

As soon as the new mom is done with the gifts, she enjoys her cake and sits and visits with those who wish to stay, while the people who need to leave can head out. Myself or one of the other hostesses will refresh coffee and drinks and offer more cake, letting people know (without telling them) that they are welcome to sit and visit.

It should be noted that we don't do games at any showers I've hosted - all of the brides or moms-to-be considered them to be juvenile, so I never included them. I always let that be up to the guest of honor, but I haven't had one choose to include any type of game yet. 

This is a great flow! You'd be surprised how serving cake during present opening can make the whole thing more interesting! I have also done Mad Libs where the guests help you complete a Mad Libs as the MTB opens presents. Keeps the guests entertained and can be very funny! 


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01-15-2013 at 10:08 PM
rhubarb123
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I agree with others that the way you are descrbing your sister talking to people/opening gifts is awkward and very time consuming.

I don't agree with opening while people are still actually eating although serving cake during the gift opening is a good idea.  Also, playing gift BINGO is a lot of fun (but I would have cards already made up with the boxes filled in.

The biggest thing is to tell your sister to spend no longer then 1 minute (or maybe 2 max if the gift is in a bag and there are multiple items).  Also, make sure there is someone there to hand her the gift, take away the paper, writing down what she got and from which guest and someone else take the gift and put on a table for display (maybe the same person taking the paper away).  Some families like to pass the gifts around if they are small enough.  I have found (and I've hosted and attended a LOT of shower) that the majority of people DO like to see the MTB open the gifts.

Obviously my family and friends do not agree with Stina2012's family/friends because they love the games (not the cheesy ones...but always up for a "new" game).  Maybe they are just juvenile...these 40, 50, 60, & 70 year old ladies.  LOL

 
01-15-2013 at 10:47 PM
Spacebunny...
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Been to two that did the BINGO and both times it definitely kept everyone interested in the gift opening.

Once was very fun--we made our own cards.

The other time a bit less so because we made our own cards and then they collected them and scrambled them so I got someone's card that was full of really random stuff that of course wasn't ever given. (The person who had my card won.) 


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01-16-2013 at 4:59 AM
EastCoastB...
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20 people? No reason why the gift opening needs to take any longer than 15 or 20 mins. Much less time for her than to just sit and talk to one person at a time and more time for her to mingle and eat w all her guests.

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01-16-2013 at 8:41 AM
agd09
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My shower is this weekend and my mom and I decided to ask everyone to keep their presents unwrapped.  All she asked on the invitation was for a card and bow. I am so happy she did this because watching people open presents can become very boring.  And my husband will be there as well to help go through the gifts so that way we can actually mingle with all the guests.

 
01-16-2013 at 8:55 AM
stephweins...
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Your idea seems a little strange to me, honestly.  When you described your sitting sitting in a chair greeting her guests I immediately thought of Queen Elizabeth sitting on her throne greeting all her subjects.  It sounds very formal to me. 

I love the portion of the party where the gifts are open.  I really enjoy seeing all the gifts opened and ooh'ing and ahh'ing over cute little things.  People expect that they're going to have to sit through gift opening.  I think i'd be more bored playing extra games than watching the presents opened.


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01-16-2013 at 9:45 AM
Stina2012
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agd09:

My shower is this weekend and my mom and I decided to ask everyone to keep their presents unwrapped.  All she asked on the invitation was for a card and bow. I am so happy she did this because watching people open presents can become very boring.  And my husband will be there as well to help go through the gifts so that way we can actually mingle with all the guests.

I think this is weird. Why do people think the gift opening is so horrid? It is the entire point of a shower! Showering the MTB or Bride with gifts! I personally love the gift opening. And also some cheesy games (sometimes). =)


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01-16-2013 at 9:49 AM
Helenahhan...
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stephweinstein:

Your idea seems a little strange to me, honestly.  When you described your sitting sitting in a chair greeting her guests I immediately thought of Queen Elizabeth sitting on her throne greeting all her subjects.  It sounds very formal to me. 


 

Honestly, this is what came to my mind as well.

OP, I think your heart is in the right place, but this just seems really awkward.  20 gifts from 20 guests should take maybe 30 min tops? 

 

Also, just as an aside, I have never gone to a show and not brought a gift.  If I couldn't get a gift (for whatever reason) I would send my regrets and a lovely card.


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01-16-2013 at 10:46 AM
alixap
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I've hosted a lot of events/showers and I've found that the easiest thing to do is let everyone come in and chat and mingle for a few minutes. When most or all of the guests have arrived, we serve the appetizers/brunch (with the guest of honor being served/seated first). She is nearly done eating by the time everyone else is sitting, so she starts opening presents while everyone is enjoying their food.

One hostess collects the plates and waits for a few minutes, then starts cutting and passing out the cake (if there are a lot of gifts - at the last baby shower I hosted, there were about 35 gifts, all with multiple things in the bags and boxes, so this took a while to open) and the hostess would also pass out juice or coffee.

As soon as the new mom is done with the gifts, she enjoys her cake and sits and visits with those who wish to stay, while the people who need to leave can head out. Myself or one of the other hostesses will refresh coffee and drinks and offer more cake, letting people know (without telling them) that they are welcome to sit and visit.

It should be noted that we don't do games at any showers I've hosted - all of the brides or moms-to-be considered them to be juvenile, so I never included them. I always let that be up to the guest of honor, but I haven't had one choose to include any type of game yet. 

This sounds like a great flow plan. Thank you!! :)
 
01-16-2013 at 10:55 AM
alixap
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Thanks again for all your input. Looks like I'm tossing my idea out! I'll just focus on keeping drinks and food flowing while my sis opens up gifts. & bingo seems like a pretty popular game that isn't too cheesy so I'll probably add that to my to do list as well.

I definitely never thought of people seeing my setup as "Queen" on a throne that everyone has to pay their respects to. Glad someone pointed that out to me...our family is super laid back and that wouldn't go over well.

 
01-17-2013 at 8:34 AM
ChevyFam71...
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Try doing an Open House type shower instead of a big planned out shower... it will give her more time so people can come and go and just have the food as a buffet and drinks so no one is required to stay longer than they want and view ALL the gifts...

Though I do love seeing what other people buy and how their gifts were wrapped etc. so I'd kind of miss the gift opening part of it (though I might be unique)... Any tech savy people that can take pictures and keep an ongoing slideshow of the gift opening troughout the day? That might be fun!


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01-17-2013 at 10:18 AM
MandJS
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agd09:

My shower is this weekend and my mom and I decided to ask everyone to keep their presents unwrapped.  All she asked on the invitation was for a card and bow. I am so happy she did this because watching people open presents can become very boring.  And my husband will be there as well to help go through the gifts so that way we can actually mingle with all the guests.

This is awful. You should never put "rules" on what people give you and telling them not to wrap it is ridiculous. The PURPOSE of a shower is to shower the mom to be with gifts. Yes, that includes watching her open them. If you just drop off an unwrapped gift, you might as well not bother. 



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