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01-17-2013 at 8:39 AM
ashcart01
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My students- ? for teachers

I'm only about ten weeks but my belly is ridiculous. 

I'm pretty petite, so this sudden swollen belly is pretty obvious. This is my second child- my first is only 7 months old.

I realize most of this is bloat and fluid, but hiding this from my nosey high school students is becoming impossible. I'm already in maternity pants and I had to break out one of my maternity shirts today.

My boss and the other teachers know (out of necessity, as I have had to leave my classroom to get sick).

Last school year, one of the other teachers told the kids and I didn't have to deal with it. When they asked me in front of the whole class it was already common knowledge.  Im now at a different school and I'm not sure how to handle the situation.

If they ask, do I tell them it's none of their business? (I've had one student ask in private and I told her "don't worry about it"). Do I lie? I'm just waiting for one of them to ask in front of my whole class. 

Thanks.  


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01-17-2013 at 8:46 AM
purplepean...
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It depends on the relationship you have with your students. You might as well tell them since they probably know and your only going to get bigger. It seems like you feel its awkward to tell them, (i could be wrong) but i suggest rip off the band aid. just announce, there is something i want to tell you, im sure most of you know I am pregnant. thats it. 

also, depends on their age.

I think it will be awkward if you ignore it and dont address it. IMHO. 


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01-17-2013 at 8:51 AM
ashcart01
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Gosh I know. I'm just chicken sh*t. They're in high school and know how "this happens"- so it makes me feel awkward. I'm really just hoping one of them asks and I can be like "yep" and move on. 

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01-17-2013 at 8:54 AM
vintageuto...
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I would wait until they ask and then address it then. There is no need to lie.

 
01-17-2013 at 9:09 AM
arlingirl
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I told my yearbook staff pretty early because they knew something was going on with me. 

I waited a few more weeks to tell my other classes...freshmen-seniors. They were all really excited and don't really treat me any different. This town has a lot of teenage pregnancy so they're used to seeing pregnant girls around school, which I wish wasn't the case, but it is.

And I won't lie...I was hoping if I told my freshmen class, maybe they'd give me some slack. They're rough. LOL They haven't yet, but maybe as my bump gets bigger.

You tell when you feel ready, though. I didn't see a reason to keep it a huge secret.  


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01-17-2013 at 9:11 AM
HennieLee
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I have a good relationship with my high school students, so I told them during class one day.  They were very excited for me, which I thought was so sweet.

No one was inappropriate.  Yes, they know how it happens, but they are also just kids at the end of the day.

I told them, "I'm going to have a baby, and I wanted to let you guys know because I may have to miss a few days here and there for appointments, and I will be missing the last few weeks of school."

Basically, I explained to them why I was telling them.

They asked a few questions that most people ask (when are you due, do you know if it's a boy or girl) and then they let it rest.

 
01-17-2013 at 9:29 AM
KdgTeacher
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I teach 4th grade, but I told my students a few weeks ago.  I made a hang man game of it. 

I think you could bring it up and get it over quickly.  Something along the lines of, "I know some of you are wondering and yes I'm pregnant" answer their questions and move on. 


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01-17-2013 at 9:38 AM
SopranoMam...
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I haven't told my students yet, but I'm also still quite early. I teach 7th and 8th grade. I'm actually really excited to tell my 8th grade chorus... they're awesome girls and we all get along really well. (There's actually a couple of them that I hope to use as babysitters in a year or so!) I just know they're going to be totally excited and I'm looking forward to sharing that with them.

Most of my other students I know will be excited, but I'm not exactly bursting to tell them... so I'll probably wait until I start showing and then tell my classes... I would rather just tell them and have it over with (and enjoy the excitement) than try to hide it and let rumors run wild. 


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01-17-2013 at 10:16 AM
BelhurstBr...
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I quit teaching when I had DD but I waited for one of them to ask and then I told them... but I was well into 20 weeks before someone asked. It really only took telling one class before they spread it around the whole school. 


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01-17-2013 at 10:24 AM
ashcart01
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BelhurstBride:
I quit teaching when I had DD but I waited for one of them to ask and then I told them... but I was well into 20 weeks before someone asked. It really only took telling one class before they spread it around the whole school. 

 

I'm super jealous. I wish I could stay home. DH is also a teacher and coaches- so while we both have good jobs our midwest teacher salaries don't go very far.

Last time once the loud teacher had told one student they all knew. It was actually really nice. It's funny how quickly the news spreads with kids.  


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01-17-2013 at 10:28 AM
BelhurstBr...
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ashcart01:

BelhurstBride:
I quit teaching when I had DD but I waited for one of them to ask and then I told them... but I was well into 20 weeks before someone asked. It really only took telling one class before they spread it around the whole school. 

 

I'm super jealous. I wish I could stay home. DH is also a teacher and coaches- so while we both have good jobs our midwest teacher salaries don't go very far.

Last time once the loud teacher had told one student they all knew. It was actually really nice. It's funny how quickly the news spreads with kids.  

We made some life changes prior to getting pregnant with DD to make sure we could afford for me to stay home. I always knew there was no way I could be both the teacher I wanted to be as well as the parent I wanted to be.

I still have some random side jobs... coaching, run a summer rec program, and also babysit a little boy in my home.  



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01-17-2013 at 10:42 AM
ashcart01
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BelhurstBride:
ashcart01:

BelhurstBride:
I quit teaching when I had DD but I waited for one of them to ask and then I told them... but I was well into 20 weeks before someone asked. It really only took telling one class before they spread it around the whole school. 

 

I'm super jealous. I wish I could stay home. DH is also a teacher and coaches- so while we both have good jobs our midwest teacher salaries don't go very far.

Last time once the loud teacher had told one student they all knew. It was actually really nice. It's funny how quickly the news spreads with kids.  

We made some life changes prior to getting pregnant with DD to make sure we could afford for me to stay home. I always knew there was no way I could be both the teacher I wanted to be as well as the parent I wanted to be.

I still have some random side jobs... coaching, run a summer rec program, and also babysit a little boy in my home.  

 

My sister did this with her three kids. I've tried to convince him that we could make it work, but he isn't even slightly swayed. We will have two under two and I'd love for them to be able to stay home with their mom rather than go to daycare.  


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01-17-2013 at 10:52 AM
BelhurstBr...
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ashcart01:
 

My sister did this with her three kids. I've tried to convince him that we could make it work, but he isn't even slightly swayed. We will have two under two and I'd love for them to be able to stay home with their mom rather than go to daycare.  

DH had reservations, as well, for various reasons. (Some that I don't need to list here.) On the money end... for DH to be comfortable with the idea we had to practice living off of just his income, and we did so for nearly a year before making the decision to get pregnant. My income, that we weren't using, went toward paying down student loans, buffing up a couple savings accounts and saving up to pay cash for our Pilot.

I didn't start babysitting until last spring, so we had a couple years of being used to just his income. (and what little I make on my side jobs... those are almost more for my mental need than anything financial.) Now the babysitting money is just a bonus and we put it toward extras that we wouldn't otherwise be able to afford anytime soon, like a kitchen reno.



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01-17-2013 at 11:00 AM
MadApple
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I'm a SAHM now, but I was teaching 8th grade when I was pregnant with my first. I know that some of my students suspected that I was pregnant before I told them all, but they didn't want to ask. I finally told them right before Thanksgiving break when I was about 15/16 weeks. If they had asked me before then (if I was comfortable about the viability of the pregnancy), I would have just said yes. I don't think I was obviously pregnant much earlier than 15 weeks anyway.

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01-17-2013 at 11:17 AM
ashcart01
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WELL- they just asked. :) I guess that takes care of that. 

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01-17-2013 at 11:35 AM
SarahSueBo...
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I know it is tough, but if one kid asks directly, you should definitely not lie to them. That sets a really, really bad precedent with high schoolers and can break their trust, which will impact your classroom in lots of ways. You can always make a joke of it by saying "I was hoping you'd just think I was getting fat" and then move on. Really, they'll probably be super sweet about it. Or, if you want to tell them, you can say "I've been hearing rumors that I'm pregnant, so I thought I'd let you know the rumors are true."

Good luck!


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01-17-2013 at 11:59 AM
arlingirl
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BelhurstBride:
ashcart01:

BelhurstBride:
I quit teaching when I had DD but I waited for one of them to ask and then I told them... but I was well into 20 weeks before someone asked. It really only took telling one class before they spread it around the whole school. 

 

I'm super jealous. I wish I could stay home. DH is also a teacher and coaches- so while we both have good jobs our midwest teacher salaries don't go very far.

Last time once the loud teacher had told one student they all knew. It was actually really nice. It's funny how quickly the news spreads with kids.  

We made some life changes prior to getting pregnant with DD to make sure we could afford for me to stay home. I always knew there was no way I could be both the teacher I wanted to be as well as the parent I wanted to be.

I still have some random side jobs... coaching, run a summer rec program, and also babysit a little boy in my home.  

this is what we are doing too.  I am a photographer too (who isn't) so I'll be focusing on that.  


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01-17-2013 at 3:01 PM
lilybit01
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SarahSueBob:

I know it is tough, but if one kid asks directly, you should definitely not lie to them. That sets a really, really bad precedent with high schoolers and can break their trust, which will impact your classroom in lots of ways. You can always make a joke of it by saying "I was hoping you'd just think I was getting fat" and then move on. Really, they'll probably be super sweet about it. Or, if you want to tell them, you can say "I've been hearing rumors that I'm pregnant, so I thought I'd let you know the rumors are true."

Good luck!

I have a different opinion on this.  I teach middle school and trust is equally important, but so is them being taught manners.  I have had two students out right ask if I'm pregnant and I have said the same thing to them that I would say to any adults who ask before I'm ready: While laughing: You know it isn't appropriate to ever ask a woman if she is pregnant, even if her belly is really big, or she has gained a lot of weight.  If someone wants to tell you they are pregnant, that is fine, but you should never ask." And then I've moved on.  It has worked both times and I haven't been mean about it, but I think they get the point.  I have a great relationship with all of my students and I'm glad they were comfortable asking, but they also need to learn what is and isn't appropriate.  Tell them when you are comfortable telling them.


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01-17-2013 at 4:09 PM
msspeedyma...
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I teach 7th grade, and I had to tell my students at about 7 weeks, because my m/s was so bad, I was so nauseated and sick all the time, that it was obvious! One day we switched a student from another class into mine, and when I gave him an extra desk, it turned out someone had left an old apple in it and it was rotten and smelly. When the kid told me, and I went over to it, I almost lost it, and I had to admit to the kids that I was really nauseated, and asked if someone could clean it out (one of the boys stepped up!). After that, they all started asking me how I was feeling, what was wrong, mentioning that I didn't seem like myself, etc. I could tell they were speculating, so I just went ahead and told them. They were really sweet about it, and they've been really great about giving me a break when I'm not feeling well.

This group was really immature when the year started, and we've worked a lot on self control and monitoring our own behavior. I noticed that once I started getting sick, they really stepped up their maturity with monitoring themselves and each other to manage their behavior. They are SO much better now than at the beginning of the year!



 
01-17-2013 at 4:59 PM
rae6883
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I have the same question.....my students aren't as nosey (elementary) but I do have about 600 students (music teacher).  Not really sure how to handle it.

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01-17-2013 at 9:32 PM
erbear
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I told my students (I teach 8th) once it became obvious. I don't see how you're going to hide it.

"Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you've got about a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies. God damn it, you've got to be kind." - Kurt Vonnegut
 
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