I don't know if this is a terrible idea or not, but I've resumed baby-wearing around the house. Granted, my kid is still under 20lbs, but if he's being needy and he's sleepy, it's easier if I wear him. I had to cook dinner last night with him, because he needed to eat still, but didn't nap well and was sooo tired.
I don't wear him all the time (that would kill me), but when I know that he just misses mama or he's over-tired, I'll throw him in the moby.
This. Honestly, I don't think a 1 year old is usually throwing a tantrum or being stubborn. I think they're tired/hungry/cranky/miss mom/don't understand.
I would not gate him off to cook or clean, I think that's silly. In that situation, he just wants to be closer to you. So by saying, "It's okay," it's really not okay. He is not okay with the situation. You know that technically he is okay in terms of safety, but he does not feel the same way.
I think that people have the tendency to start treating their 1 year olds who are walking and staring to talk like much older kids than they actually are. Just weeks or months ago, they were carried everywhere and were treated like babies. They still are babies.