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01-24-2013 at 11:20 AM
Bamgal25
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Keeping the secret

So I've had a few encounters so far in my pregnancy that make me worried people are going to find out before I want them to.  The first occurred during my appointment for a second blood draw (3 days after a BFP).  An acquaintance of mine came in to the doctors office before I went back and I came out 3 minutes later, so I feel it was obvious why I was there.  Not too worried about her knowing, as we don't really talk, but she is pretty good friends with one of my good friends.  Hopefully she didnt say anything to my friend that she saw me there though!

Second occurrence was yesterday when I went to the doctor for cold symptoms (mainly to make sure it wasn't strep).  A lady that attends the same church as my in-laws is a nurse there.  Well normally I don't run into her, but OF COURSE yesterday she was the nurse assisting me.  I didn't mention I was pg at first, but then when they wanted to do a sinus x-ray I had to mention it.  She said "I won't say anything about it" and I told her we haven't even told our in-laws yet so she said "Ok, I definitely won't say anything about it!"

We told my parents and siblings that we are expecting last weekend because we were in the same town, but we are still planning to wait before telling anyone else (even my in-laws) until next weekend after the u/s.  Really hoping no one else that I know will find out so I don't have to worry about someone spilling the beans before I get to!

Sorry this is so long, but anyone else have these fears that people will find out their "little secret?"  

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01-24-2013 at 11:25 AM
MrsPhinney
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In my job I work with undergraduate medical students, and one of the students' mother also happens to be a colleague of mine. When I was waiting to have an u/s done the other day, the student walked right through the waiting area. I shrunk down hoping he wouldn't notice!
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01-24-2013 at 11:51 AM
LiebeMama
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My sister knows were about to start TTCing...Nowone else knows. I also plan on keeping it quiet until after week 10 of becoming pregnant ;)
 
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01-24-2013 at 11:52 AM
mrs.mickul...
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We told our parents right away, but waiting to tell the general population until we're through the first tri.  However, I've been so sick for the past week and had M/S for long periods of time in the past- so I'm afraid I'll out myself.  It's been particularly difficult at work! 
It's a boy!
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01-24-2013 at 12:00 PM
cherrys
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Bamgal25:

The first occurred during my appointment for a second blood draw (3 days after a BFP).  An acquaintance of mine came in to the doctors office before I went back and I came out 3 minutes later, so I feel it was obvious why I was there.  Not too worried about her knowing, as we don't really talk, but she is pretty good friends with one of my good friends.  Hopefully she didnt say anything to my friend that she saw me there though!

 **Routine bloodwork is all you need to say if questioned** 

A lady that attends the same church as my in-laws is a nurse there.  Well normally I don't run into her, but OF COURSE yesterday she was the nurse assisting me.  

 **It would be a HIPAA violation if she told your in-laws she saw you at her work** 
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01-24-2013 at 12:18 PM
Bamgal25
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cherrys:
Bamgal25:

The first occurred during my appointment for a second blood draw (3 days after a BFP).  An acquaintance of mine came in to the doctors office before I went back and I came out 3 minutes later, so I feel it was obvious why I was there.  Not too worried about her knowing, as we don't really talk, but she is pretty good friends with one of my good friends.  Hopefully she didnt say anything to my friend that she saw me there though!

 **Routine bloodwork is all you need to say if questioned** 

A lady that attends the same church as my in-laws is a nurse there.  Well normally I don't run into her, but OF COURSE yesterday she was the nurse assisting me.  

 **It would be a HIPAA violation if she told your in-laws she saw you at her work** 

The first one was at my OB's office, so I still think that would be suspicious.  And I know it would be a HIPAA violation, but the paranoid side of me just worries anyway.  I know that neither of these people will say anything, but I am just hoping no one else will see me doing something "baby related" before we announce our pg.   

 
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01-24-2013 at 12:29 PM
mamainsept...
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Totally understand your fears! We have only told immediate family and 2 friends. Its pretty clear that I have "baby bloat" especially since I'm in maternity clothes and we were at ShopRite the other day when ran into a friend of ours. We hadn't told him yet and he's the type that tells EVERYONE. So far he's kept his mouth shut, but I know that will end soon.
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01-24-2013 at 12:38 PM
AppleMuffi...
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J is going to have to tell his coworkers earlier than I wanted to tell people. He has a small company and apparently they're changing insurance in March so I'm pretty worried about it. Dh is going to have to talk to his boss to see what we're getting so we can be prepared. It's a really small company though and most people there share the same office space so he said it will he impossible for the other people not to hear. Personally, I think there has to be some way he tell her needs to speak with her without telling anyone, but he doesn't really have a desire to keep the pregnancy a secret from people. He said he wouldnt mind if he had to tell them I miscarried. He's been trying to respect my wishes though.
 
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01-24-2013 at 12:45 PM
nowababy
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I'm going out to a bar with my mama friends next week. I'm sure they'll put two and two together when they see I'm just drinking water. But I won't say anything. It's way too early! I'd consider telling them if I were at least 8 weeks.
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01-24-2013 at 12:48 PM
smilormari...
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Bamgal25:
So I've had a few encounters so far in my pregnancy that make me worried people are going to find out before I want them to.nbsp; The first occurred during my appointment for a second blood draw 3 days after a BFP.nbsp; An acquaintance of mine came in to the doctors office before I went back and I came out 3 minutes later, so I feel it was obvious why I was there.nbsp; Not too worried about her knowing, as we don't really talk, but she is pretty good friends with one of my good friends.nbsp; Hopefully she didnt say anything to my friend that she saw me there though! Second occurrence was yesterday when I went to the doctor for cold symptoms mainly to make sure it wasn't strep.nbsp; A lady that attends the same church as my inlaws is a nurse there.nbsp; Well normally I don't run into her, but OF COURSE yesterday she was the nurse assisting me.nbsp; I didn't mention I was pg at first, but then when they wanted to do a sinus xray I had to mention it.nbsp; She said "I won't say anything about it" and I told her we haven't even told our inlaws yet so she said "Ok, I definitely won't say anything about it!" We told my parents and siblings that we are expecting last weekend because we were in the same town, but we are still planning to wait before telling anyone else even my inlaws until next weekend after the u/s.nbsp; Really hoping no one else that I know will find out so I don't have to worry about someone spilling the beans before I get to!Sorry this is so long, but anyone else have these fears that people will find out their "little secret?" nbsp;


Any chance you're in Delaware? That sounds like my daily life! Other than my mom crashing at my house 1 week after the positive HPT when I was out of town for work and had everything pregnancy and baby related left out in the open, I luckily have not had any other close calls!

Our little lightbulb is on the way!

TTC since Oct 2011
Me: 33, hypothyroidism since 14, cleared all HSG, US, Pre-pregnancy panel tests.
Hubby: 36, testicular Ca, chemo April-May 2012.
Natural cycle IUI #1 with trigger and Progesterone Suppositories (Jun 2012) Neg
Natural Cycle IUI #2 with trigger and Progesterone Suppositories (Jul 2012) NEG
Aug 2012 - break due to needing a girls' weekend in Cape Cod
Natural Cycle IUI #3 with trigger and prednisone (Sep 2012) NEGATIVE
Switched fertility clinics - forced break Oct 2012
Natural Cycle IUI #4 (Nov 2012) no trigger, no progesterone, no prednisone (Nov 2012) - Neg
1st round Clomid Cycle IUI #5 (Dec 2012) - POS
 
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01-24-2013 at 1:05 PM
rhek003
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There are so many things that could happen that we can't predict or control that might raise others suspicions. However, I'd like to think that most people are smart enough not to ask about someone's pregnancy without knowing for sure. If they do have the balls to come right out and ask - then just DENY! DENY! DENY! 

:)  
 
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01-24-2013 at 1:16 PM
Bamgal25
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smilormarie:
[ Any chance you're in Delaware? That sounds like my daily life! Other than my mom crashing at my house 1 week after the positive HPT when I was out of town for work and had everything pregnancy and baby related left out in the open, I luckily have not had any other close calls!

Ha, no I am in Alabama.  I know a lot of people that use the same OB as me though, so there is a chance it will happen again.  I have already abandoned waiting until 12 weeks to tell people because I feel like I will be a nervous wreck if I try!
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01-24-2013 at 1:21 PM
Bamgal25
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rhek003:

There are so many things that could happen that we can't predict or control that might raise others suspicions. However, I'd like to think that most people are smart enough not to ask about someone's pregnancy without knowing for sure. If they do have the balls to come right out and ask - then just DENY! DENY! DENY! 

:)  

LOL!  Well most people are smart enough, but I seem to know some that don't mind asking.  I have had two coworkers ask me since I've been pg when I was going to have a baby.  It's like they have a sixth sense or something.  

Also, a while back, my MIL felt the need to check with me to make sure she would not find out we were expecting via Facebook.  Like, obviously I am not going to tell you that way!  She said she wants to find out in a creative way.  No pressure or anything! 

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01-24-2013 at 1:40 PM
MJHershey
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A few very close friends know, but that's it... we tell people after the 12 week mark- though it's rough to wait. There were some shenanigans with dumping out a beer can and filling it with water to make it look like I was still drinking last time.

BIG Congrats NY Mama, Labor Buddy 2010 - now September/December Labor Buddies 2013!

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01-24-2013 at 2:12 PM
SweetC80
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MJHershey:
A few very close friends know, but that's it... we tell people after the 12 week mark- though it's rough to wait. There were some shenanigans with dumping out a beer can and filling it with water to make it look like I was still drinking last time.

This. Or I've heard of women going to the bar to get their own drinks and asking for a tonic water w/ ice and lime to make it look like a drink and just sip on it all night.

You could volunteer to be the DD, just say you've had a cold all week so you'll take your turn while you aren't feeling 100%.

Me Dx: Weak Ovulation / Total Thyroid Removal
DH Dx: Mild MFI (borderline all 3), Varicocele
TTC#1 since 5.11
Clomid 50mg + TI = Poor Response
Clomid 100mg + TI (x2) = BFNs
Clomid 100mg+IUI#1 (5.6M Post Wash & 1 Follicle) = BFN
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