Out of curosity what year, and what specaility. My husband is a radiology resident, and I am a SAHM. I am not sure what I would do if I had to work because I feel like our lives revolve around him and his training! I think you should get major credit for being a working mother married to a resident, busy stuff! I clean everything, and he works, and that is just how we split things up. On his own he cleans up here and there and helps, alot more if he is on a light rotation. If I worked as well that would not be the case at all, it would need to be more evenly split for sure (esp. being sick and pregnant). He need to have chores he does as well, the hard part is that you can't really set chores since I am sure he is busier based on call schedule and what rotation he is on. Does he have to study a lot as well? Maybe he can have chores, and pick up the slack if he is on call?
It is diffucult with a resident as a spouse because there is no consistancy, there are boards along the way to study for, rotations that vary, call, perhaps nightfoat. It seems like every month bring something new. You guys will need to figure out a flexible plan. Also you might just have to say at some point this is a busy time of life. He s a resident, you work full time, you have a toddler, and you are pregnant. Avoid a grossly hazaradous house, but standards may need to be lowered a bit. Piles of mail here, unvaccumed rooms, dust an inch thick on the TV :) Get through this time, be happy, and tell him to be flexible, and work with you. There will be a time in life that he will work a little less, and your kids will be older and can help, and your house will be sparkiling perfection then. Remind him of that, and tell him how you are feeling. He does need to help more though most deffinantly!