I guess I'm pretty tacky because I always do a mail merge and print address labels for mass-produced invitations - Christmas cards, parties, etc. I never thought twice about it. Sorry, but in the age of technology I think it's totally acceptable to not hand-write addresses on envelopes that get thrown away after one glance. People are busy and doing it on the computer is much faster and IMO looks a heck of lot better than handwriting unless you have perfect penmanship. The stamping is OK by me too. If this offends you, I seriously think you have some issues.
In regards to the other stuff - people can put whatever they want on the invitations - if you don't agree with it, you don't have to go to the shower, but at least send a gift as a means of reciprocation if the guest of honor gave you a gift for your shower in the past.
I personally would not travel that far for a baby shower and just send a gift or money. I think it's rather tacky and rude of you to post this on a web forum when you've been "friends" with this person for so long. Not a great friend if you ask me.