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01-28-2013 at 5:19 PM
LadyDelila...
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Rememberance Names

How do you feel about remembering a passed loved one with the name of a child? grandparent, father, brother? Whats nice and whats weird? What about using a middle name as a first name?

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01-28-2013 at 5:29 PM
mdesmond23...
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I want to do this for my grandfather, but will be using a different form of his name.  I am planning on making a post closer to my due date (June) to ask for thoughts.  I also am using a family middle name.  I think it is a nice thing to use a rememberance name if it means something to you.  
 
01-28-2013 at 5:29 PM
GWUAlum
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I don't think it's weird, but I'm not a fan of it. Many people are. I don't think there's anything wrong w/ it. It's just not my style. I picked my names because I like them. Plus I don't have to worry about offending anyone, and within our families someone's feelings would get hurt. 
 
01-28-2013 at 5:30 PM
Idani
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I'm generally a fan.  I personally usually prefer to use the middle spot and give the child their own first name.

 
01-28-2013 at 5:36 PM
Enigma11
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I did this with both our children. My son's middle names are my dad's first and middle names. For our daughter we used my grandmother and great grandmother's first names. My grandmother is still alive, but I still wanted to honour her

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01-28-2013 at 5:44 PM
ChristyML
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LadyDelilah:
What about using a middle name as a first name?

Exactly what I did. My dad passed away when I was 15. His middle name was Joseph (it is also my brother's middle name). Luckily, I also LOVE the name Joseph. I wasn't pressured at all to use the name Joseph, and it was my own idea.


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01-28-2013 at 5:47 PM
Joy2611
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The middle names that my husband and I have picked out for a boy and a girl are family names.  We picked them because we loved the people so much that we wanted our children to carry their names. 

The boy's middle name is after a step father who has passed.

The girl middle name is after my grandmother, great aunt, and mother who are still living.

Living or dead makes no difference to me.  It's the *person* who counts.

Is there a weird line?  In my opinion - no.  An honor is a beautiful thing.

Middle name as a first name?  Sure.  Doesn't bother me.  I don't get hung up on "You name them what you will call them."  

01-28-2013 at 5:59 PM
alphalyrae
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All of our middle name options have family significance. I don't have a problem with it at all. There are a lot of cultural connections. But I also think it's incredibly rude of family members to push the issue if the mother/father are not interested.



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01-28-2013 at 5:59 PM
Happy_Yaho...
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I don't find it weird, but it's not something that I would personally do.  I do like Rose, my grandmother's name, as a middle name, but if I use it, it would not specifically be in rememberance.  And I see no problem with using a first name as a middle name or a middle name as a first name.

4/12/10 - Began TTC 8/2012 - IFV #1 - 18 follicles retrieved, 11 usable, 10 fertilized, 9 continued to grow, 2 tranferred, BFN :( 9/2012 - Treated for uterine infection 10/2012 - Uterine infection cleared up 11/12/12- Began IVF #2 12/19/12 - 2 embryos tranferred 12/24/12 - Tested Christmas Eve morning - BFP!!! :) 12/28/12 - Beta #1 - 193 12/31/12 - Beta #2 - 624 1/7/13 - Beta #3 - 7544 1/14/13 - Beta #4 - 31,067 1/16/13 - IT'S TWINS!!!! Two healthy heartbeats! Due Date - 9/6/13 Lilypie Pregnancy tickers  
01-28-2013 at 6:29 PM
blu-eyedwi...
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Idani:
I'm generally a fan.  I personally usually prefer to use the middle spot and give the child their own first name.

This is how I feel also.


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01-28-2013 at 6:39 PM
MrsAery-to...
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I like the idea of honoring family members by using their names. I don't like just picking a name that is used in the family unless it is someone you are close to. DS's MN is after my favorite grandpa. I also prefer to use the actual name, either first, middle, or last, but am not a fan of using a name that starts with the same letter and saying it is after someone.

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01-28-2013 at 8:17 PM
jburdet1
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I think remembrance names are special. DD's mn is a name passed along my maternal side of the family and serves as a remembrance to me of the women that all share the same name. If we have a son both names will be family names. His mn will not serve as a remembrance, but to honor my living father and the fn will be my husband's and his grandfather's mn, so I feel using a family mn as a fn is a great way to honor the passed and living.

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01-28-2013 at 8:25 PM
SarahL77
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We like it. DD's formal first name is after DH's grandmother.

If we ever have a 2nd DD, her first name would likely be a variation of my Nana's name.

01-29-2013 at 12:15 AM
frome
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Idani:
I'm generally a fan.  I personally usually prefer to use the middle spot and give the child their own first name.

This is what I will be doing. My own first name is a variation of my grandmother's first name, and I absolutely love having that connection to her. If you're going to pass along the name in the first name spot, I think a variation of the name is better than the same name.

 
01-29-2013 at 5:16 AM
-auntie-
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I'm OK with recycling family names to honor the dead so long as it isn't painful to others in the child's life. Best t check this out with those involved.

I think it's weird when people smoosh or give multiple middles to honor multiple people- it reminds me of selling naming rights to a stadium.

I don't care for giving the name of a dead child to another child. I don't buy into gentiles claiming that a name with the same initial is really honoring someone, like naming your child Reilly and saying it's after grandma Regina. And I don't like naming after someone of questionable virtue.

 
01-29-2013 at 9:39 AM
BabyBowers...
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I just posted on another board! I lost both of my cousins Mark & Jenny in 1999... I absolutely adored Jenny & since the accident I always said I wanted to use Jennifer as a MN if I ever have a daughter. It doesn't flow well with much, but I could care less. I miss them both still every single day & I think it would mean a great deal to my aunt & uncle. 

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01-29-2013 at 9:45 AM
ShoeFanati...
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Definitely not weird. I think most posters here are on board with passing down family names. It is very important to us that our children all have at least one family name. We gave DD the mn Jane after my grandmother. Our boy middle name is either going to be Edward (my H's grandfather's name) or James (my FIL's middle name). Our girl middle name (or first; we can't decide) is Alice, H's grandmother's first name. She died a few months ago. They all mean a great deal to us.

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01-29-2013 at 10:59 AM
kriskelly8...
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I dont think its weird at all. personally i think every kid should have their own identity, so i want them to have a first name that is just for them. my son will have 2 middle names. one is a family name on both sides- Michael, and  the other is Henry in memory of my great grandpa Hank.
 
01-29-2013 at 3:43 PM
janneann11...
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I think it's awesome. We plan to honor my recently deceased grandmother by naming our daughter her name, if we have a girl.

we love our wild child!
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01-29-2013 at 7:52 PM
Iloveshane...
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My DD is named after family with her FN and MN!

Carly
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loss of her twin 11/06, m/c 1/09, m/c 2/13

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01-29-2013 at 8:50 PM
Amanda&Eri...
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My  mom passed in December 2011 and I will be using her middle name for this LO.

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01-30-2013 at 11:55 AM
MandJS
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My kids first and middle names are in memory of deceased loved ones. That's our tradition, but I also like that their names have special meaning. I don't necessarily think you have to use the same name. E.g., Tamar is named for my aunt Susan, who was a strong woman, a feminist, a fighter for what was right, a loyal wife, a family person, etc. The Biblical Tamar has these same attributes. 


AngelSmitty: This reminds me of something my college Human Sexuality professor used to say in class. "Sex is between the legs. Gender is between the ears."
 
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