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02-19-2013 at 2:58 PM
greenteabe...
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shower, and then a meet the babies party?

okay so I said my mom wants to throw me a shower, and I'm gonna go along with it, tell her to keep it really small and just close family/friends. I'd like to have a bigger meet the babies party were co-workers, family friends, etc can come meet them in the summer time, a big co-ed bbq type thing. Is that tacky to have both, especially because the boys will be at both? What if I say gifts not necessary? Should I say no gifts, or gifts not necessary?
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02-19-2013 at 3:04 PM
MandJS
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Don't mention gifts. A shower is intended for gifts. Your mom is throwing it. Etc. A meet the baby party is NOT about gifts. People may bring them, but it's not necessary. You won't be opening gifts at the MTB party. Etc. 

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02-19-2013 at 3:28 PM
526SadieSa...
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Honestly, I wouldn't do both.  If I were invited to two parties for the same children within a couple months, I'd side-eye. 

If the shower was before the birth, I'd feel differently but two parties close together with the babies in attendance can seem gift-grabby.

Rather than do both of them, ask your mom to help you with the Meet the Babies party.  People (myself included) feel obligated to bring gifts to parties for children. 

I agree not to mention gifts on the invite at all.
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02-19-2013 at 3:31 PM
Helenahhan...
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I think it's fine.  Just call it a BBQ. 

If you got an invite to a BBQ, you wouldn't feel obligated to bring a gift, right?

Anyone who decides to come to the BBQ that wasn't at your shower and wants to bring you something might still do so, though if they know the babies are going to be there.

 

Congrats on your boys, BTW!

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02-19-2013 at 3:33 PM
526SadieSa...
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Helenahhandbasket:

I think it's fine.  Just call it a BBQ. 

If you got an invite to a BBQ, you wouldn't feel obligated to bring a gift, right?

Anyone who decides to come to the BBQ that wasn't at your shower and wants to bring you something might still do so, though if they know the babies are going to be there.

 

Congrats on your boys, BTW!

If you don't call it a MTB party and it's just a BBQ, that's entirely different. 

 
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02-19-2013 at 4:03 PM
discobelle
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I would just stick with a shower with close friends and family.
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02-19-2013 at 4:31 PM
EastCoastB...
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I agree- if you want to have a BBQ, then just call it that.  A BBQ.  Don't make it about the kids.  Clearly they'll be there and people will be able to meet them.  But I feel if you make it a "Meet the babies' party", people MAY feel they need to bring a gift and if they were also invited to a shower.... it could be off putting.

While I do feel Meet the baby parties are NOT gift giving events, often times anything baby related is automatically "oh, I need to bring a gift".

So, take the baby out of the party and jsut have a party.

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02-19-2013 at 4:53 PM
1026pumpki...
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I agree with PPs- I would have your shower and then have just a regular BBQ in the summer for a larger group of friends....no need to call it a "meet the baby" even if that's when people will be meeting the baby for the first time.

If people ask you when they'll get to meet them, you can just say you're planning a big get together when the weather is nicer and the babies are a little bigger. 
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02-19-2013 at 4:57 PM
TX-Bride
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1026pumpkin:

I agree with PPs- I would have your shower and then have just a regular BBQ in the summer for a larger group of friends....no need to call it a "meet the baby" even if that's when people will be meeting the baby for the first time.

If people ask you when they'll get to meet them, you can just say you're planning a big get together when the weather is nicer and the babies are a little bigger. 

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02-19-2013 at 9:03 PM
tilsonc
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I would not do two events UNLESS you have two different guests lists for each. i would not invite the same people to both parties as it will look tacky and is too much with both events being so close together.
 
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02-19-2013 at 9:34 PM
rhubarb123
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If you are waiting until the babies are older and inviting a lot of people that are not invited to the shower then I wouldn't have a problem with it.  I had a meet the baby party but didn't have a shower.  I'd say just over 1/2 the guests brought a gift (mostly diapers/wipes and outfits).  I would not mention gifts at all. 
 
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02-20-2013 at 1:33 AM
guilletski...
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1026pumpkin:

I agree with PPs- I would have your shower and then have just a regular BBQ in the summer for a larger group of friends....no need to call it a "meet the baby" even if that's when people will be meeting the baby for the first time.

If people ask you when they'll get to meet them, you can just say you're planning a big get together when the weather is nicer and the babies are a little bigger. 

All of this. And if people want to bring a gift because they want to give you one and haven't met the babies yet, then they can do so then. I've taken baby gifts to different kinds of events when the MTB didn't have a shower and if I hadn't seen them before the event.

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02-21-2013 at 8:24 PM
julienoe
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ill have both since id rather have a bbq have people in and out of the house id rather have a time for everyone that wants to meet the baby to gather at one time

and yea don't mention gifts usually people who didn't attend the baby shower will be the ones bringing gifts.
 
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