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02-20-2013 at 8:26 PM
nicoleh55
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how is your sex life?

how is your sex life since you got pregnant? Ours was terrible in my first tri. because i was so sick. second tri got better, even great during a few weeks. but now I'm almost 30 weeks and i don't feel sexy, my belly is in the way, i'm tired and i am really just not in the mood. I thought i would surprise my hubby when he got home from work on V-Day, but i fell asleep :(

does anyone else feel this way?

or do you have any ideas on a way to spice up things in the bedroom?

 
02-20-2013 at 8:30 PM
tmsgrl
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It is non-existent and will be that way until my postpartum check up.  No desire on my part.  I am way too tired and sore...and grouchy.  Maybe that would make me less grouchy though.
 
02-20-2013 at 8:32 PM
RussianMom...
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foreplay and dont lie on your back - think of other positions

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02-20-2013 at 8:37 PM
JSS1002
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We were averaging about once a week since I got pregnant, and a few hot weeks in the second tri, but lately I have just been so sore and achey that it isn't appealing at all.  However, I am a bit frustrated because I feel like DH waits to initiate until the end of the day, when I'm exhausted, rather than in the morning or mid day when I've got energy and am feeling good. 


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02-20-2013 at 8:47 PM
Anne Mommy
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Sex life? I think I remember that...

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02-20-2013 at 8:48 PM
mammamia24
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Nonexistent. I think we've had sex  times since I became pregnant. It doesn't help that for four months I was on pelvic rest.

Alexander 03/13/2008 Jace 03/20/2013 My boy's are my whole world, I'd be lost without them. 
02-20-2013 at 9:45 PM
Luckey4
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that was one thing I was kinda curious about when I first found out we were pregnant. Im like great will we ever have sex again? but shockingly it hasnt changed really. I only had 1 morning of morning sickness in the 1st trimester so that was a bonus. We usually go for 3-4 times a week and Im 33 weeks. I think only one or two of those weeks it was 1-3 because I had such horrible sinuses but DH definetely understood! what a trooper! I just wonder how we're going to make it the 6 weeks partum... i dont think very well Sad

 
02-20-2013 at 9:50 PM
maymomNY
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This is my first post here because I realized I'm officially in the 3rd tri.  Yay!  So this answer may change for me in the coming weeks...

Lately we have both been exhausted but kinda forcing ourselves to have sex about once a week.  I am usually not in the mood before we get started, but once we do it is the best sex of my life every time.  I don't know if it's extra bloodflow or what, but it's seriously amazing.


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02-20-2013 at 10:08 PM
24ladybug
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Anne Mommy:
Sex life? I think I remember that...

Ditto! Any time we have tried its been only ok for me. Just too much work right now. I'd rather take a nap.

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02-20-2013 at 10:57 PM
happywife2...
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It changes every few days. Like OP I was sick all 1st tri so no sex. Ugh. Then I got super horny in 2nd tri. Now approaching 3rd tri and ambivalent on sex. One day I have.to.have.it, and the next day I don't want to hear a thing about sex. Tomorrow is my birthday and what I want most is not to be asked for sex. But when I wake up I may feel totally different!

I am also experiencing a major resurgence in mood swings and nausea these last few days. Hormones. Love them.

 
02-21-2013 at 12:04 AM
Charlotte0...
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With my first we had a very good sex life with pregnancy. This time between preterm labor and everything hurting from the c-section scarring, it's been terrible! I can't wait tell after my healing period to feel intimate again.

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02-21-2013 at 1:02 AM
KrissyandE...
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First and second trimester were great....about 3-4x/week...but into the third trimester i'm so exhausted and feel so unsexy. He or I initiate it at least once per week even if we know neither of us are in the mood.  Why you ask?? Because honestly, once we start, it's SO worth it!! We get in the mood very fast and are always happy we did it. It does help keep us intimate and connected.

So my advice to you is....even if you don't feel up to it, do it and see how you feel after :)

 
02-21-2013 at 1:35 AM
AFBTB
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I have the opposite problem: our sex life is non-existent because of DH. Though I carry the blame for our non-existent sex life in 1st tri, but I was very sick. But during my 2nd tri DH had back surgery, and the pain and the meds they have him on really killed his libido, where as mine is back to what it was before. It really sucks. And the vivid sex dreams I'm having because of my high libido is not making it any easier.

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02-21-2013 at 4:19 AM
TallPregMa...
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my husband refuses to have sex with me for fear that my water will break while it's happening. My libido is sky high, so it's frustrating for me as well.
 
02-21-2013 at 4:20 AM
TallPregMa...
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Anne Mommy:
Sex life? I think I remember that...

 

This ^ 

 
02-21-2013 at 5:27 AM
tashadee75
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Nonexistent. I don't want it physically. I miss it in my head but I've been miserable throughout this pregnancy so my body is just not up to it. Because this is DH's first...all things baby freaks him out and amazes him at the same time so he feels he'd just rather wait. I mean he doesn't even want BJs. It's like we both turned off our "switches"(as he calls it).

But we both agree that postpartum...even with a baby...we're really gonna take advantage of the hours that LO is sleeping to make up for lost time! 

 
02-21-2013 at 5:37 AM
BrilliantB...
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It is non-existent... 

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02-21-2013 at 6:11 AM
tig594
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*snort*

Sex life?  What's that?

The first tri I was also ordered by the OB not to partake.  I've honestly had no desire, though.  I'm huge, exhausted, hormonal & grumpy, and my SO just pisses me off lately.  We've managed maybe 6-7 times in the last 33 weeks and it was ok but not something I'd initiate myself.  Like a PP, he also always waits until bedtime when I'm half asleep to initiate.  I've made suggestions to him of ways to light the fire a little bit but he never does them.  He lifts weights and has a nice body so if he'd just show me some skin once in a while or splash on a little of my favorite cologne my libido might just perk up a little bit.


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02-21-2013 at 6:22 AM
OhBaby+201...
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Here is some unsolicited advice from a FTM with a 4 week old baby.  HAVE LOTS OF SEX NOW!!!!!  We had sex 5 or 6 times the week my son was born but not much in the weeks before that.  I'm now 4 weeks PP and had a traumatic vaginal delivery which means it will be MONTHS before I am cleared for sex again.  I miss the intimacy so much with my DH and look forward to being better, but I wish we had of had lots more sex, even on the days I just wasn't into it or feeling huge.
 
02-21-2013 at 6:31 AM
oliversmom...
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I have been very lucky bc it hasn't changed at all. Even though these days I am exhausted, I still make time. I'm hoping it helps the baby come sooner too. lol Have you tried buying something sexy or even toys that you guys can enjoy together? 

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02-21-2013 at 6:43 AM
KateRN08
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Non existent thanks to a placental abruption at 20 weeks.

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02-21-2013 at 6:45 AM
genepoolpe...
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maymomNY:

Lately we have both been exhausted but kinda forcing ourselves to have sex about once a week.  I am usually not in the mood before we get started, but once we do it is the best sex of my life every time.  I don't know if it's extra bloodflow or what, but it's seriously amazing.

This exactly. Ripening the cervix.


                
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02-21-2013 at 6:53 AM
Kimber517
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TallPregManda:

Anne Mommy:
Sex life? I think I remember that...

 

This ^ 

 

totally... first and second tri were fine, but now- I just cant.. My DH is a saint. I want it in my head, but my giant belly and sore hips and tired self just cannot do it. I cannot wait to get my body back to myself.. LOL


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02-21-2013 at 7:05 AM
MT-Head
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Maybe once a week.  I just feel like such a hippo and am so uncomfortable that I don't really want it.  Plus, with a 2 year old, it is hard to sneak away even for a 10 minute quickie.

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02-21-2013 at 7:45 AM
KrisM86
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Eh, it's okay. We're only having sex once or twice a week at this point. I am so uncomfortable and exhausted all the time that even when I'm in the mood, it seems like too much work. Me on top was working well for a while but now I'm too big to really move very well up there.

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02-21-2013 at 7:46 AM
KrisM86
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TallPregManda:
my husband refuses to have sex with me for fear that my water will break while it's happening. My libido is sky high, so it's frustrating for me as well.

Ugh, that sucks. I don't understand all these men with so many ridiculous and irrational fears about sex during pregnancy. Have you tried reminding him that it will be at LEAST 4-6 weeks after the baby comes that you'll be able to have sex again? And that you'll have a screaming newborn waking you up constantly and interrupting you every time you have sex? He should really get it while he can! 


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02-21-2013 at 8:21 AM
dalzien
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nicoleh55:

how is your sex life since you got pregnant? Ours was terrible in my first tri. because i was so sick. second tri got better, even great during a few weeks. but now I'm almost 30 weeks and i don't feel sexy, my belly is in the way, i'm tired and i am really just not in the mood. I thought i would surprise my hubby when he got home from work on V-Day, but i fell asleep :(

does anyone else feel this way?

or do you have any ideas on a way to spice up things in the bedroom?

Our sex life hasn't been changed at all. I guess I am one of the lucky ones that never experienced morning sickness, and while I definitely don't feel sexy this late in the game with all of the weight I've gained (almost 40lbs now), DH constantly makes me feel beautiful.

TMI part: 

We have excellent communication, which really helps. As far as being this late (I am just over 35 weeks and feel like I am the queen of sea cows) we find it is most comfortable to do things doggy style with a blanket and pillow under my bump for the best support and comfort.

Also to keep my sex drive up (sometimes it gets really low) we have sex just to keep things going, even when I am really not in the mood. While it sucks at the time (and it does), it actually makes him feel better and I find it makes the next time easier and I "want it" more. 

I hope everything works out for the two of you, and just remember that communication is key. If you just cannot have sex try foreplay. This way you'll both feel satisfied and loved, and not ignored. 

 
02-21-2013 at 9:49 AM
brrkrrs18
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Ha! Hardly existent. Every time we try it hurts me really bad down there for some reason. Just isn't a very good time for me. :/

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02-21-2013 at 10:31 AM
kimberlyk9...
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1st trimester I always felt nauseous...2nd trimester was great!!....and now in the 3rd I get heartburn so I have to make sure and pop some tums first lol. We are going on our babymoon this weekend so hopefully we can get it on.

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02-21-2013 at 11:54 AM
PansyPants
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My what? 

 

Yeah, we're barely having sex and although I would like to have sex my body isn't feeling up tho it most days. Last pregnancy we had tons of sex but this time I've had a lot of low pressure and soreness, it makes me really uncomfortable even trying. We do other things to stay intimate.  


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