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02-22-2013 at 7:16 PM
TMaggie042...
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Etiquette Question - NBR

This is a general etiquette question although it could certainly apply to a baby shower.

Suppose a host invited 20 or so people to a function.  The host proceeds to cancel said event the morning of the day the event was supposed to take place.  The host then proceeds to still have the event later that night but didn't invite all of the people back that he/she canceled on and only told a handful to come back and proceeds to post pictures of said event all over facebook for everyone to see. Would this be poor etiquette?  How would you react to the host doing this if you were one of the people excluded from the re-invite the same night?

ETA:  Event was canceled because host said GOH was not feeling well.  GOH posted photos and host was tagged in photos. 
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02-22-2013 at 7:19 PM
1026pumpki...
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Yes, that is terrible.  Even assuming that the reason for cancellation was an illness or something where the host felt up to seeing a few people, it should definitely have been kept off Facebook.  If I were one of the uninvited, I would assume the host didn't feel close to me and would back off on the friendship.
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02-22-2013 at 7:21 PM
Estwd2
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Um, yeah, completely bad etiquette. That's horrible! I'd expect a personal apology from the guest of honor, assuming it's not the hostess. I'd then proceed to think of the hostess as a horrible human being and curse her existence.
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02-22-2013 at 7:40 PM
brittbronk...
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This is terrible etiquette and a failure of being a human being (the host of course). I'd be pissed and incredibly hurt. I'd definitely tell the guest of honor how I felt.  
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02-22-2013 at 8:22 PM
PrimRoseMa...
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That's really rude and kind of mean. Gross.
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02-22-2013 at 8:57 PM
BallSox
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That's a real jackass move, honestly. 

"Hey we're cancelling the party, Susie is sick" means there is no party, period.

 
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02-22-2013 at 9:40 PM
ELauren88
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What a terrible thing to do!! I'll add, though, that I must disagree with PP. I would also be pretty pissed at the GOH. They obviously knew what was up, and did nothing to stop it. It may have been their idea.

I'd be having some very serious talks with both of these people, calling them out. 
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02-22-2013 at 9:41 PM
milkergirl...
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I was uninvited from a birthday party several years ago, and it's an awful feeling.  I still hold a grudge against this person.  I was invited by one person to a birthday party, only to be told by this other person that there were too many people going and I couldn't go-so I didn't.  I later found out from the goh that there was plenty of room and the person that uninvited me really wasn't hosting anyway. 

It's terrible that they only reinvited a few of the people, but even worse that they spread it on Facebook.   
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02-23-2013 at 8:09 AM
Michelle N
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This is terrible! Coming from a quiet, non-confrontational person, even I would say something. They both the host and the GOH are assholes.. they both knew what was going on.
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02-23-2013 at 11:08 AM
blush64
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Estwd2:
Um, yeah, completely bad etiquette. That's horrible! I'd expect a personal apology from the guest of honor, assuming it's not the hostess. I'd then proceed to think of the hostess as a horrible human being and curse her existence.

This. Even with an appology things wouldn't be the same.
 
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02-23-2013 at 12:59 PM
rhubarb123
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Michelle N:

This is terrible! Coming from a quiet, non-confrontational person, even I would say something. They both the host and the GOH are assholes.. they both knew what was going on.

I tend to go along with this one as well, although agree with all the other posts to some degree.  It is poor etiquette, but I feel it goes even beyond that.  By posting it on Facebook the GOH actually rubbed it in the face of the non-reinvited guests and actually showed (by doing so) that she could care less about hurt feelings.  I would definitely drop that friendship like a hot potato because obviously you (and others not-reinvited) are not as close to her as you thought you were.  I'd also not be mailing or taking the gift you got (if you did) even after the baby is born.  I'm not one to keep silent so I'd make sure BOTH the hostess and the GOH know that what they did was seen by many of the non-reinvited guests and it was a shiitty thing to do.  If this is a family member there would be some drama going on even though I'm not one to usually cause family-drama.
 
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02-24-2013 at 1:58 PM
TMaggie042...
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Thank you everyone for your responses.  Although I perhaps have a tendency to be a little sensitive I don't believe I was off-base in my feelings of being hurt over this particular situation which is why I asked the question.
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SO THRILLED DELINO'S SWEET BABY GIRL IS HERE! 
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